I agree that it is better for you as an individual to
not ask for help - because while ever you believe that no one can really help you, you are just going to drive other people insane and they will irritate the heck out of you!
While I am a great believer in self-repair, I like to keep in mind that when it comes to solutions:
me:not me ratio is
1:6.73 billion
The odds are that there can be useful and effective help out there...when you go
looking for it rather than when it is imposed on you.
You also sound like you need a hug to me.