Misty_Mountain_Rose
New member
- Joined
- Jul 21, 2008
- Messages
- 1,123
- MBTI Type
- INTJ
- Enneagram
- 4w5
My Mom is an ISFJ. All throughout my childhood, holidays were a BIG deal. She went all the way... and often over the top... but we all looked forward to each and every one.
As a parent, I often feel guilty because I don't seem to have the same excitement (Ok, it's non-existent most of the time) and I struggle with making ANY kind of deal at all of it for my daughter. It's a chore and a burden. For me, most holidays are just like any other day. This is made worse by the fact that most of my family doesn't live anywhere near us so we often have no one to celebrate with. Lets face it, making a big turkey dinner for 2 is a little depressing.
Yet, I still manage to make some kind of effort. The result though is disappointing in my mind when I think of all the things my Mom did, and its done out of a sense of obligation (my child should know what it's like to have a Christmas tree and how to color easter eggs) rather than a true sense of enjoyment on my part. I have to fake the smile and the excitement.
Maybe its just part of growing older... maybe my parents faked their asses off too. Maybe its the INT selfishness that bogs me down.
Whatever it is... I wish it wouldn't dog me so frequently. :sad:
Does anyone else experience this?
As a parent, I often feel guilty because I don't seem to have the same excitement (Ok, it's non-existent most of the time) and I struggle with making ANY kind of deal at all of it for my daughter. It's a chore and a burden. For me, most holidays are just like any other day. This is made worse by the fact that most of my family doesn't live anywhere near us so we often have no one to celebrate with. Lets face it, making a big turkey dinner for 2 is a little depressing.
Yet, I still manage to make some kind of effort. The result though is disappointing in my mind when I think of all the things my Mom did, and its done out of a sense of obligation (my child should know what it's like to have a Christmas tree and how to color easter eggs) rather than a true sense of enjoyment on my part. I have to fake the smile and the excitement.
Maybe its just part of growing older... maybe my parents faked their asses off too. Maybe its the INT selfishness that bogs me down.
Whatever it is... I wish it wouldn't dog me so frequently. :sad:
Does anyone else experience this?