I was reading another thread in this forum which mentioned the possibility that ENTP's might underestimate the importance of Ti, while INTP's might tend to underestimate the importance of Ne.
I don't think that I underestimate the value of my Ne (I know it's my way of connecting with people and the outside world, and it's also good to get out of my own head). But, one of my problems seems to be actually being able to CONNECT with people when I do use my Ne. I have found that when I'm talking to another primary or secondary Ne user, we usually connect extremely well - but that only includes 4 of the 16 types (and not a large percentage of the overall population). With the other 12 types, I don't connect very well. I want to connect with people more often, but I find that instead of my Ne "connecting", it feels more like the other person is "missing" what I'm saying - or I'm "missing" my target. I can almost use the analogy of swinging a baseball bat. When I use Ne with other Ne users, I connect with the baseball and the baseball goes far. When I use my Ne with others, it's like I just can't quite seem to hit the ball. I've learned to not care as much. If I feel that I "missed" in a given situation, then I just move on and not let it bother me too much (there are times, when I choose to actually reflect on it, that it seems a bit sad, pathetic, and depressing) - basically, I've learned to live with it.
But, I think that I have gotten to a point where I more or less "expect" to miss - I might think, "I'd like to join in and conversate with that group" (whether it be friends/acquaintances/or a business situation), but then I'll just think, "95% chance it will be awkward or they won't get me, so I'm just going to go on my way".
So, the question is: how do you use your Ne to connect with "the masses"? In particular, the 8 "S" types? When you know that you don't have much in common with a group or an individual, but it's still important (or otherwise desirable) to connect with them, how do you do it? Tips? Pointers? What if you start to use Ne and you get the vibe that they aren't getting you or they think you're eccentric? Do you continue to use your Ne or do you try to mix in some other function(s) to meet them half way?
I'll paint this picture using my limited knowledge about cognitive functions, and my experiences with interacting with people in ventrilo:
Ne is an extraverted function, and as such, it is a function well suited for interacting socially with other people. In fact, I'd say all extraverted functions do this so well, that when they are in the dominant position (like with an ENTP high on Ne), their primary purpose is in interacting with and connecting with MULTIPLES of people, not individuals. Introverted functions are just the opposite in social orientation, and focus more in depth and quality than on breadth and quantity of personal relationships.
For me, when I go into ventrilo, I've learned quite a few things about how to temporarily alter behavior to better interact with the group. I am able to converse with the group on their level of discussion (sometimes) WITHOUT having to focus on any one person and instead generating my responses based upon the group dynamic and not upon factors related to specific individuals within the group. I can converse with everyone without having to pre-analyze what I'm saying, and still illicit a positive response (most of the time). This, as far as I can tell, is the process of temporarily shifting function order from Ti > Ne to Ne > Ti. In this way, I can use my Ne to better deal with a plurality of people.
On the other hand, when I'm not using that process, and my Ti is taking the lead, dealing with groups of people can be very tiresome for me, difficult, annoying, and fruitless (as I perceive it). This is just the opposite of when I really shift into a state of apparent Ne dominance. When I'm in my normal state, I'm very selective about what types of conversation I'm interested in, the main requirement being that they have to be intellectually stimulating or my brain will throw a fit. With Ti in the lead, I still like to talk to people, but on an INDIVIDUAL level. Normally I absolutely love to have great deep conversations with people I'm closer to. Doing this allows for my Ti and Fi to lead in a constructive way that is not a social hindrance, directing my Ne in a pattern specifically geared towards that individual. It's a much more rewarding experience, whether I'm in a Ti or Ne state of mind though, mostly because the Ne dominance process is underdeveloped for me as a natural Ti user. Thus, I can adapt to social situations where Ne can be useful (and Ti a hindrance), but I will truly shine where I can make use of my real dominant function Ti, which would be privately in close 1 on 1 interactions.
This pattern of behavior and perception, for me, also takes place irl. Groups of people are much harder for me to relate to and interact with unless I'm in that specific state/mood of Ne dominance, or at least to the point where Ti is about level with Ne, and is not trying to choke it out.