well i was just saying that to me the only people who would really label us as difficult would be those who thought they could control us or do as they expected...people really shouldn't be doing that anyway. how is that immature to expect someone not to?
It's all semantics. The threshold ENFPs have for the word control is very different than most people, too.
It is not immature per se, but it is naive to not expect people not to "control" us. And by controlling I don't mean that which is regarded as controlling by everyone out there, but the things we ENFPs see as controlling and other types just see as normal.
Think of it as a mother and child. The mother loves her child very much, she might even be the most uncontrolling mother of all time...that won't save her from feeling sad if her son makes bad decisions in life and is completely inconsequential ... she won't try to control because that's not the kind of person she is, but she might feel sad to see that her son doesn't seem to give a crap about the hurt he is causing his mother by his actions ( I consciously avoided any concrete example, because what I'm trying to illustrate is abstract anyway, but I'm sure everyone can think of an example for themselves).
Btw, I wasn't directly replying at you. I just used the word control because that is I think, how a lot of ENFPs feel, and what the concept around which our apparent "difficulty" seems to revolve.
I think if all us ENFPs had our way, we could do any and everything without anyone judging us and we'd always be loved and well liked by all. Is that good? I don't think so. We could depend on others to help us, but no always be in the mood to help other people (even if we have a big heart) because we are just too lazy and hedonistic. etc etc
Because all of this is tied to caring. When one doesn't care, it's pretty easy to just do what one wants. But when other people are involved...we are prone to forgetting other people ARE involved.