You, my dear, ask the best questions in this thread.
Let's just hope the response to this one doesn't get lost to the ether...
How does inferior Se manifest in INTJs?
Inferior Se manifests in many different ways. Some of which I'm aware of:
- Compulsive need for sensory stimuli when stressed. When I'm stressed, I feel the need to take a hot shower. Many people might say a similar thing, but I doubt it manifests as consistently, strongly, and compulsively as it does in me. I will take a hot shower, get out, and then want to get right back in. I don't want it to stop. As long as I'm feeling soothing hot water rolling over my head, I'm not trippin about whatever's going on. Often times it actually allows me to look at the matter in a clearer light, clear my head, get back into a more productive zone. (A similar thing might happen with sex or masturbation, depending on what's easy/available at the moment. This isn't as consistent as the shower thing, though.) (Other INTJs, I believe, might also report something similar with substance use, whether alcohol, tobacco, or other drugs. This has never been much of an issue for me. I [have] use[d] all these things in moderation, at some time in my life, but have never had much of a compulsive use or abuse problem. I've seen, though, that INTJs are the third most likely type to get help for a substance abuse problem.)
- A high sensitivity to unpleasing sensory phenomena., whether a sight, sound, a smell, a taste, a temperature, a texture, a position, having someone touch me, etc. This one can be pretty bad, cuz it's highly uncontrollable, can rear its head in relationship situations, wherein the other person is trying to cuddle, or is touching me in a certain way, or a number of other things, and, I dunno, I can have just a really visceral reaction caused by frustration over the other person not realizing how uncomfortable/displeased they're making me. It's not uniform, either; something that I'll enjoy at one time will be something that will bother me at another. There's something disgustingly immature, imo, about expecting the other person to realize the discomfort they're causing you, but, at the same time, part of me says that the person should be attuned to such a thing. The thing is, then my rational brain kicks back in and recognizes how absurd it is to expect the other person to always "just know". I'd say this is one of the uglier manifestations of it.
- Information addiction.
- Unusual/inordinate attention to details. This one is well-covered in Naomi Quenk's
- Pervasive sexuality. I'm kind of just generally a hornball. It's like part of me will always be a 23-yr old SP. My ENFP ex used to get pretty annoyed when we would walk around a video store and I'd always stop and check out (every single one of) the C-rated boob flicks. With Se in the demonic position, I don't think she appreciated my conundrum. I can't really help myself. If the cover is enticing, I'm gunna pick it up, look at the back to see if there's any more eye candy, and there's really no two ways about it. I don't see anything wrong with it either. These are my urges. Why the fuck should you care? Sexually, this manifests as a willingness to explore, which is probably why INTJs have a reputation for being phreaks in the bed.
- INTJs' oft-noted obsession with anime. Anything else explain this oddity?
Are you aware of accessing it in the moment, or with later reflection?
Well, I mean, first off, does one have to know what Se/inferior Se is in order to be aware of accessing it?
I've always been aware of the above-mentioned attributes to some degree, and recognized them as being due to something inside me, and I'd say I've steadily become more aware of it over time. Some people who I'm close to, throughout my life, have commented on my... uhm... strong sexuality. I'm not sure if it's because I'm an sx dom, or inferior Se, or both, or what, but I would lay at least some of the blame on the Se. Even if it's our 4th function, it's kinda always there, subconsciously, underlying everything.
I'd say, now, with a strong theoretical backing in typology, I'm pretty aware of it most of the time. That doesn't mean I necessarily do or can do anything about it. Frankly, I like those C-rated boob flick covers (I mean, it's not like I've ever actually rented one or anything [I'm not a frickin SP]); I like taking showers when I'm stressed; rubbing one out or fucking my girlfriend can be a great stress reliever; and, well, I like (good) anime). I do want to be able to handle displeasing sensory phenomena better. I try to, and I succeed to some extent, but I don't find my current type/level of response acceptable.
Do you see yourself using it in a negative, immature way?
I think I've already covered this.
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I'm kinda done with my first crack at this.
Ima keep adding to the above over the next few days.
Feel free to ask follow-up questions; I'm pretty sure I've got more to say about it.