I don't think the projection we're talking about is associated with taking things personally. The projection to which I'm referring is the NFP's insistence upon how others seem to be feeling, and if you don't agree that this occurs, just look at the first page of this thread.
Maybe it's not purely a result of projection, but projection occurs because it's the easiest way to figure out feelings when the issue is emotionally puzzling. It seems like some times NFPs look for emotional connections when there really aren't any (and I bet many NFPs would argue that there are *always* emotional connections, even when others don't see them, but most other types would argue that that's not the case). You guys care about being empathetic and figuring out feelings, so maybe you just look too deeply for emotional signs. Therefore, in cases that are impersonal and emotionally neutral, you find correlations that aren't really there, and the easiest correlation to find with other peoples' feelings (or in this case, create?) is the one that you'd personally feel yourself. Thus the phenomenon of "projection."
Well, I can easily accept someone coming from a neutral angle when it's true. I'm actually not that interested in figuring out people's feelings. I usually only examine what is thrust on me and solicited from me. I prefer to remain untouched, not to have empathy stirred - that is tiring.
However, when there is a
pattern of denying any emotion in the moment and then
later admitting the Fi person was correct, then it's hard to take that person's denial seriously if they exhibit
that very same behavior in the future. This is why I don't project - If I don't know someone well, I have no sense of who they are and cannot pretend to know; I can only go by what they express. If I know someone very well, that is the only time I may trust my instinct over their claims, because it's based on a
consistent pattern of behavior I have noted. That's still rare because I don't push confrontation, and if someone says, "I don't feel that way", then I am content to leave it there. I've never seen an NFP
insist that someone feels something they do not, so I imagine I am pretty typical. The
insistence that we do that is tiring and needs to be dropped.
Then there is the issue of expression. Word choices, phrasing, vocal tones, facial expressions, etc, DO have clear connotations in every culture. I'd argue these are often Fe and Si determined, because I sure get grief for not always following them also. So if you exhibit behavior generally considered "angry" by the majority of people, you shouldn't be so surprised when people see you that way, even if it's not true. It is your responsibility to communicate yourself clearly and be aware of how you come across to others. Everyone has to do that, of any type.
Can someone please answer why Fi users (actually NFPs because SFPs aren't claiming this) want to claim so badly the Empathy Prize. Fi does not have a monopoly on empathy, Fi is not more predisposed towards empathy. These are character traits, these are learned traits, the are developable traits, not traits inherent to a cognitive function. Sometimes when people describe Fi it's like they just touch a person and this searing emotional pain just overwhelms them and they pass out on the floor from the power of it. It's comical! It doesn't even align with real life at all.
I've never heard anyone make these claims, especially your ridiculous description of how a Fi user feels empathy. No one is saying
only Fi empathizes anyway. I disagree that certain functions are not predisposed to certain strengths though. Everyone can develop empathy, yes, but MBTI profiles note patterns in types, and that's why NFPs get tagged as being empathetic. There is a predisposition for certain traits in certain types, whether it is true of every individual of that type or not. How else would you type people?
Why the insistence on denying every positive attribute ascribed to Fi? Do you have anything positive to say about it? I think that's more of a challenge for some people here. Say something positive about NFPs directly related to their Fi usage - I dare you.
Can we have a discussion about functions without people getting all defensive and teary-eyed? What good does it do to only discuss the positives of a function and never the negatives?
It was going great til the ENTPs barged in. Back and forth discussion from Fe & Fi users, acknowledgment of weaknesses, etc. I personally don't feel a discussion has to be void of emotion to be valid anyway.
bolded part = win
If INFPs are not projecting their own emotions when they erroneously attribute everyone else's behavior to hidden emotional trauma, where are they getting this from?
Metaphorical application through Ne. It's called imagination and making very abstract connections, not direct comparisons. It's common for an INFP to trust theory over their own experience for the same reason. We prefer to look at the numerous possibilities over past experiences.