[MBTI General] ENFPs and INFJs. Why?

[SillySapienne]

Scurvy, it happens.

Eat your vitamin CC!!

 

[Little Linguist]

we do and are enthusiastic about doing silly/creative things. I tend to be cautious and quieter when first getting to know people or in class room settings but once I'm sure no one has a stick up their bum i'll let loose.

This is true. I do not know about the other ENFPs, but I am totally not the party gal, social butterfly kind of girl. That could be because my functions are very balanced, so I am not overly E, overly N, overly F, or overly P. My functions balance each other out, which means I am not an oh-my-god-I-have-never-seen-such-an-extroverted-party-girl-in-all-my-life kind of person. Or it could be that most ENFPs are like that.

My extroversion really shows itself when I am discussing with interesting folks and when I love the topic. After 8-12 hours of teaching, I am bouncing off the walls (totally extroverted, in other words). If I discuss something about which I am very passionate, I will also be lively, crazy and totally engaged - I can talk for hours, and the more I talk, the more fun it is (I will stay up til 5 a.m. talking if I have a good discussion partner and a good topic). Also, if you engage my imagination, I can tell crazy-ass stories. I am also the kind of person who will randomly aim her baby-blue umbrella in a firing position (like a rifle) towards people who drive too fast on a road in a residential area and scare the shit out of them. Things like that. Not exactly your introverted personality.

However, a day of teaching unmotivated, disinterested folks will drive me into quiet seething - I BOIL INSIDE. :steam: Also, talking about boring, superficial nonsense makes me feel like or :horor:.

I'm also usually quieter around people I know will not appreciate my extroverted, crazy nature. So I am quiet at first so I can suss out whether or not it is appropriate. I can "play" any type, really. So if I am around pole-up-the-butt academics, I will also act like a pole-up-the-butt academic. If I am around people who love to be silly and have fun, I will act like my "normal" self. If people are really into their sensing sides, I will try to adapt. Or thinkers - I will use my Te, though not as well as they do, obviously. With really competitive people, I will turn out to be the most competitive, perfectionistic person; among positive, friendly people, I am optimistic.

This can really turn against me if I am in a situation where I am not comfy. For example, I joined a political group in college, but they did more drinking than political discussion. Usual ranting and raving. Okay, I can rant and rave pretty well, so I had that down pat, but TRY TO GET ME TO BE THE PARTY GAL??? Gahhhh, I was so uncomfortable that I ended up getting really soused one night (although that was not my intention or my desire). So when I have to be the ESFP/ESTP kind of gal...nahhhh, that does not work, sorry folks.

For example, in the States I was quite "introverted" because I just did not "click" with the people, and it just did not "fit." No one had my interests; people did not appreciate my humor; people were put off by my directness; people were too superficial. So go to parties??? HELL NO!!!!!!!!! I'd rather be alone than be with people who do not help me to develop (my Te side?!).

On the other hand, if people talk about their feelings, experiences, and thoughts/ideas, I'm all in. I'm game. That's what I like to talk about, along with history, philosophy, religion, politics, economy (in a socio-political discussion), relationships, feelings, psychology, personal development - THINGS THAT MATTER.

But please, do not bore me with which actress is sleeping with what actor. Or the weather. Or who is dating whom. Or who put on weight. Or the local gossip (unless it involves me or I can learn about people or develop in some way). Dude, I don't care, and don't bother. Don't DON'T (oh god please DON'T) talk about sports - especially golf or football. Give them all a ball. Then they do not have to fight about it.

'Course, I might just be a "weird" (i.e. unusual) ENFP. But that is my input.

 

[Little Linguist]

yeah, um....i have too much fun with these. Yay.

HAHAHA!!! That's great!

I'm definitely the cat.

 

[Little Linguist]

Hey Mr. Random,

Just wanted to tell you, I often wait for my victim to tell me their feelings towards me before I say mine.

A couple of reasons

1. don't want to scare them off
2. don't want them to not return the feelings at the same strength I have them.

I think ENFP's (from my experience with myself :hi comes off a lot bolder and more articulate than it really is. I really just kind of play off the other person.

YES!!! I have learned this the hard way. Sort of.

 

[Little Linguist]

would it be best to say that ENFP's are zany
like an orange
their poignant, plentiful, full of Vitaman C for all that poison we have in our system
and........your turn

Who can look at that kitten and say it isn't cute?! Hmmm?

 

[phoenix13]

Who can look at that kitten and say it isn't cute?! Hmmm?

It's not cute. I HATE cats. I once had a dream that I bit into a cat like a hamburger. I can say that because this is an online forum so no one can put me away for it.

 

[runvardh]

It's not cute. I HATE cats. I once had a dream that I bit into a cat like a hamburger. I can say that because this is an online forum so no one can put me away for it.

*runs*

 

[phoenix13]

*runs*

Care for one of Mrs. Lovett's savory and sweet meat pies? Why, they're the worst pies in London!

Sondheim anyone?

 

[Hang]

Opposites attract? I like ENFPs is because they sort of understand my weird nature. And they can put up with me when I have one of those days. My ENFP friend and I had some what of a long term crush on one another. He liked playing hard-to-get (which of course got on my nerves). He always tried to impress me also. I have to say that's flatering. But it didn't work out. Usually he was self-centered, and that was a turn-off.

 

[Little Linguist]

It's not cute. I HATE cats. I once had a dream that I bit into a cat like a hamburger. I can say that because this is an online forum so no one can put me away for it.

DUDE!!!!!!!!!!! What is *wrong* with you?!?!!??!

Don't take it the wrong way...I normally like your posts a lot, but good LORD A MERCY!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Hexis]

I think it is safe to say, that, generally speaking, we make pretty strong impressions.

I find that people tend to remember me often, or rather more often than I necessarily remember them though I have a pretty decent memory of people whom I've encountered.

This I completely agree with, I dont know how or why but people seem to remember me. At first I thought this was cause of my septum ring (which now alot of people remember me just for that) but there are people who I meet who say they went to highschool with me and I swear ive never met them. And then they will recount something I did in highschool that I do remember. And I dont know what it is I do to leave such lasting impressions or even how I do it, but it definitely happens.

And as for the whole ENFP+INFJ= , im not so sure about. I do get along great with INFJ cause they at all times know when im serious even if im trying to pass it off as something else, and this really entertains me for some reason. But on a more general basis I get along with INTJ's alot better. But who knows, ENFPs might be great for INFJs but not visa versa.

Oh well those are my thoughts, now to go back to hibernateing for another month.

 

[CzeCze]

Pssht, we are AWESOME!!!!

Oh hell yes!

CA *highfive*

You summed it up right there Captain and in the very first reply too!

Damn, that is awesome-ness.

 

[Wyst]

I am still SOOO not buying into this yet.
I'm not one of the people that looks online to see what their good match-type is and then goes out to find one. That's the same as astrology BS.

Besides, "we're awesome" hardly amounts to an explanation unless you're 8 years old.
C'mon ENFPs. What's the big deal? Why are you so awesome?? Huh??

I wonder how the J and P would work out, though. Wouldn't the ENFP constantly be sick of the INFJ's planning tendencies and structure?

I guess a lot of it has to do with the fact that they share NF - but I don't know why it's good. I just know they're the same... or are they?

 

[SillySapienne]

I need a little J in a mate.

 

[phoenix13]

I wonder how the J and P would work out, though. Wouldn't the ENFP constantly be sick of the INFJ's planning tendencies and structure?

I'm tired, so I'll just answer one part of that (the first would require at least an hour of solid typing): You're a J, but your dominant function is perception, Ni. This makes you looser/ less stereotypically J than, say, an ENFJ, whose dominant function is a judging function, Fe. So, you'll piss us off, but not as much as an ExxJ

The end.

 

[sciski]

I'm also usually quieter around people I know will not appreciate my extroverted, crazy nature. So I am quiet at first so I can suss out whether or not it is appropriate. I can "play" any type, really. So if I am around pole-up-the-butt academics, I will also act like a pole-up-the-butt academic. If I am around people who love to be silly and have fun, I will act like my "normal" self.

Yay, we have this in common! Except my normal self fluctuates wildly between silly/fun and cynical/philosophical. It's annoying. I wish I could stabilise.

But please, do not bore me with which actress is sleeping with what actor. Or the weather. Or who is dating whom. Or who put on weight. Or the local gossip (unless it involves me or I can learn about people or develop in some way). Dude, I don't care, and don't bother.

We have this not in common! Trashy magazine gossip is my not-so-secret guilty pleasure... it's awesomely mind-destroyingly fluffy stuff! Love it! My INTJ girlfriend loves trashy mags too! We went on an outback camping trip a couple of years ago, and when we found ourselves back in civilisation (okay, a cafe on the outskirts of civilisation), we dove into the trashy mags like starved ants going for a lump of sugar dipped in honey. It was awesome! Brad and Ange, what would we do without you? Stars without makeup: Celebrity slimming secrets!!

 

[CzeCze]

Besides, "we're awesome" hardly amounts to an explanation unless you're 8 years old.

I told you - you're older than me, Niichan.

And we are. Awesome.

The theory of 'best match' is the same regardless of function or type. I can't explain it to you because I don't really get cognitive function preferences totally yet but I think 2 people did post quick explanations in the thread.

Basically, the idea is you share the same 'core' and are cut from the same cloth so to speak, but supports are flipped so basically you are on the same wave length yet complementary.

Or something...

So EnfP = InfJ

IstJ = EstP (whoa...whoa....is that right???)

Sometimes the 'F' and 'T' is also flipped to be complementary so

EnfP = IntJ

IstJ = EstJ (um...hmm...)


As far as 'p' and 'j' not getting along, the idea is in a 'perfect union', both people would again, supplement and compliment one another. So the 'perfect type pairings' keep in mind levels and focuses (focii? lol) of the "J" and "P", similar to what Phoenix said.

And I also think people will attest that IRL, the 'E' and 'I' can make a great pair when it works.

But really, Niichan, the proof is in the mochi. When you meet people IRL that find attractive, you could try to type them. Or break the down the functions 1 by 1 of what you want. I don't really believe in this though, because a person, and even a type, is much more than the sum of its letters.

Or observe self-professed ENFPs IRL and see what you think.

 

[Synapse]

I know an enfp and she was awesome.
But I just out flaked her and isn't interested.
P + J is better.

 

[findthejake]

Ahhh the elusive INFJ. How I love them. 8+ plus months away from the boards and this 10 page thread is the first one I dive into. I love it love it love it.

The only one in my life right now happens to be the one I've crushed on for 2 years and most unfortunately for me has a social anxiety disorder that pretty much guarantees she'll never be dateable. Super depressing. She won't take meds for it because they make her numb and unfeeling and what fun is it to be NF if you can't feel anything!

But loving her has shown me the joys of being with an INFJ, during her lucid times when she isn't ignoring the world for days on end, we've had the most amazing discussions and she's been the one person that I feel can feel totally connected with.

I think with us ENFP's we mask a connection with most everyone. We are chameleon and have the near super-power to instantly make people comfortable and get people to open up to us and trust us. BUT I think we do an even better job of getting people to believe we are opening up to them when really we are just playing off them to get them to like us or whatever. Confused yet? Me too.

With an INFJ, I don't feel that. I feel like I am really understood through all the layers of crazy that encompasses my enfpness.

INFJs, I love you and I wish there were more of you.

(and for those of you who doubt or mock. We are awesome. No other explanation needed.)

 

[CzeCze]

^^

Find The Jake??

Wow. You're back! Or not.

Good seeing ya again.

The forum has grown since you've gone -- for instance, we are amassing small armies of INFJs and ENFPs for the impending war.