[MBTI General] INFJ or INFP or another Type?

[zarc]

I've been reading some contradictory things regarding INFJs on MBTIc/generally online and some other types labelling themselves any order of INXX (nvm other XXXX). A few things for INFJs as not disclosing information easily about themselves which I know to be what INFJs do easily and joyfully when emotionally healthy. Not something so personal to them of their feelings or about their ideals unless confident in sharing them but, one example, stories about themselves while trying to Fe connect/relate to others or helping them. What others may consider too personal may not be so for the INFJ in question. Or telling people what they think they should do or should be doing (I'm doing it right now....I know). Not to say we're all asses about it or intending to be so *ahem* When I read people saying they might be INFJ or INFP and put INFx, it really puzzles me as INFJs prefer 'closure' or being decided in knowing who they are or anything, really. Everything, probably. Yes, all. Paranoia is a word for others if so, but we just look paranoid...It's wanting to be always Prepared for ourselves and others, methinks.

Vicky Jo, an INFJ and Type Specialist (among other things) created INFJ or INFP? a closer look. I was able to understand better as to why there is such difference even though I was already sure I was INFJ. It wasn't due to uncertainty at that point but rather wanting to learn more as to why. Her INFJ.com is my Rosetta Stone as to Everything Holistically and Eerily Me, the Menu is accessible on the tiny Dolphin pic on the righthand bar side and then other submenus too as well as The INFJ Handbook from the original Menu page....). I've yet to see these sites referenced here so I thought I'd elucidate this for you all if not seen yet. If older members are aware and have mentioned it in a Thread (I couldn't find any), sorry! But there are always new members (and even old) who may not have seen it yet, so check them out if so, as they're great sites! (Even her husband's INTJ site is good too for anyone curious or wanting to know more of their INTJ friend/lover/enemy/themself)

I realise it's hard 'typing' people online, even with horribly done online tests, possibly biased info, and mislabelled people touting they're that type and confusing one into believing they've mistyped themselves of any type! It may be rude of me to insinuate that you, if thought INFJ or INFP, may or may not be that type-- or even any other type mislabelling themselves. Please forgive me if it seems I'm pointing you down and out of your type. I'm not trying to type anyone either nor will I as I'm not a Type Specialist in the slightest. Nor about any or all INFJs here (I'm very certain I've read of INFJs here and some not so certain). If you turn out to still be an INFJ or INFP, no worries, right? I'm largely griping about online info/others who flap all over the place excited b/c they got one online test and base their whole life on it-- I'm also just pointing someone who can better show an INFJ or an INFP (Vicky Jo in case you forgot ), who's far more proficient than I'll ever be (not that it wouldn't stop me from trying to figure out if asked...heh)

Even if you are secure in knowing your Type of INFJ or INFP, it's a great resource tool in learning more about yourself or why you're so different (and so amazingly, beautifully different too! ). For the INFJ.com site, at the least, it's a fun quest in discovering why you re/act, conform (to social ideals/appease others) or disconnect or seem so, direct or idealize even though you may feel it's pointless in this jaded world.

Much Later Edit: I continue highlighting differences b/w the two Types throughout this Thread . At times, there will be remarks on other types too such as ISTPs which can seem similar to INFPs which can show the difference b/w INFPs/INFJs. If any believed INFPs or INFJs, or those who feel they know these Types well, read all of my thoroughly detailed (Oiii! ) depictions of either or both and feel I've misjudged them or both, please tell me so as I like to take into account other's observations. Note, I am not a Type Specialist, though I fancy I'll come close to being one throughout the years of learning ALL Types + their Cognitive Processes, so it's wise not caving in to my powerful Ni when it struts itself out to the world or in this Thread!

In order of writing specifically on INFP and INFJ:
Here,
Here,
Here,
Here - Highlights Emotionally Healthy vs Emotionally Unhealthy
Here - My views on two chars I think might be INFP/INFJ in Pride & Prejudice with links my thoughts in greater detail)
Here - How INFPs and INFJs Evolve into becoming Emotionally Healthy by being Emotionally Mature and how they can become Emotionally Unhealthy by being Emotionally Immature by accessing the First Four Cognitive Processes in GOOD ways and BAD ways + analogy b/w Trees and Forests and which Type is likely to get blinded by one or the other...

My responses with regards to INFPs, INFJs and a few other types or misconceptions I tried highlighting out:
Here, Here, Here, Here, Here, Here, Here

 

[wedekit]

Yeah, I like the infj.com website. It can literally be like a bible I refer back to when I need some insight into my situations.

 

[zarc]

Yeah, I like the infj.com website. It can literally be like a bible I refer back to when I need some insight into my situations.

So, Vicky Jo would be your Goddess then. I prefer to think of it as an INFJ Rosetta Stone .

 

[Mort Belfry]

It can literally be like a bible I refer back to when I need some insight into my situations.

Literally a similie? Hmmmmm. I'll allow it.

 

[zarc]

Literally a similie? Hmmmmm. I'll allow it.

You are so kind. I think....

 

[heart]

It seems simple once one truly understands the difference between Fi and Fe which one INFP or INFJ. A cognitive function test still seems the best way to tell for sure to me, but that's just my opinion.

 

[zarc]

It seems simple once one truly understands the difference between Fi and Fe which one INFP or INFJ. A cognitive function test still seems the best way to tell for sure to me, but that's just my opinion.

Yea, your right. My gripe is that I don't see or read, anyway, of people who do that. From reading online, I largely find people just taking those quizes (which are somewhat fine. 70% correct?). Or just start asking largely about their 'new' type (w/e type) w/o having tried learning but have clearly labelled themselves and even admit so. Or do the XXXX.

I'm not against 'newbs' at all but an honest search into MBTI, if going to be taken seriously, should IMO, be looked at seriously and not just superficially. I don't mean to indicate that all newbs or people do this, just for those that do. It might not seem a problem. But I know that INFJs like to 'be what they're supposed to be like" or connecting w/ the group (it's their group too, which is pretty STRONG to be a part of if felt so isolated in life by being different!). It's not about lacking independence or orginality. But we like knowing we're displaying our type or our type explains us. And, though, we're all different (all types too), the cognitive processes are the same. If someone claims to be an INFJ (and is healthy emotionally) but exclaims they don't feel comfortable talking about their feelings with others or disclosing personal info it's a red flag from what I've learned (and Vicky Jo, INFJ specialist lol, has stated). <--even taking direction from someone I deemed proficient is an INFJ thing (not to say other types don't do it either but some more than others).

I've read that INFPs know their own feelings best and their values too. INFJs aren't so sure of their 'personal' feelings (generally, understood over time), they can point out other's feelings , and their values may be their own too...however, they largely adopt others' values if it seems apporpriate to them/appeals to them/or were raised with them. If it smells fishy/unauthentic/mean/etc, they can reject right away or they can reject at a later point. INFPs don't like telling people what to do as it seems rude to them and they don't like it whereas INFJs do like to (being nice about it! or not...).

I also have been very dismayed of the INFJ "special" "rare" "psychic" drivel that's perpetuated by others and Keirsey (Vicky's stated his wife has preferences for INFJ so there's some bias. I can't recall if she knows them personally but she knows Linda Berens so it's possible). People LOVE being told they're unique/special/rare. So it's a pitfall for people who desperately want that label (who mostly doesn't want to be special/rare?) INFJs are no less psychic than any other type! Rarest? Has this been varified? What thoroughly globalised testing has there been to determine this? Maybe it is the rarest, maybe not. I feel that to mark one group special in such a way than another is to incite that in someone who may not be that type but wish to be it. That isn't to say any INFJs claiming to be aren't truly INFJ or are psychic. I've certaintly had psychic experiences but it's not b/c I'm an INFJ. My INTJ is has, so has an ISTP friend and other's more outgoing than all of us. I just don't like the sterotype and want others to view all types as equally beautiful/special b/c they are!

 

[heart]

Yea, your right. My gripe is that I don't see or read, anyway, of people who do that. From reading online, I largely find people just taking those quizes (which are somewhat fine. 70% correct?). Or just start asking largely about their 'new' type (w/e type) w/o having tried learning but have clearly labelled themselves and even admit so. Or do the XXXX.

I took the real MBTI in college and I still came up like 50-50 between the P-J thing. The counsellor just told me to pick which was I "liked" better and go with it! It was not until I read much deeper about the difference between Fi and Fe that I finally understood which one I was.

 

[Kiddo]

I'm an INFX through and through. I picked my type simply based on hemisphere dominance. I'm left brain dominant which correlates with J.

 

[heart]

I have to say, I don't think it is possible to be INFx without throwing out the whole MBTI theory. I think it is possible that INFP for example, with stronger Te may mistake this for being J.

 

[Atomic Fiend]

That Vicky Jos website saved me a lot of stress when I was having my Identity crises a while back.

Now I'm free for other crises that come my way.

 

[zarc]

I took the real MBTI in college and I still came up like 50-50 between the P-J thing. The counsellor just told me to pick which was I "liked" better and go with it! It was not until I read much deeper about the difference between Fi and Fe that I finally understood which one I was.

That seems irresponsible of that counsellor to say. I would've told you to go to a Type Specialist (which I plan on doing anyway so I can learn more). However, as you chose to delve deeper, at least you didn't take that advice.

I'm an INFX through and through. I picked my type simply based on hemisphere dominance. I'm left brain dominant which correlates with J.

I wouldn't know which it correlates with but I wouldn't have picked it so easily based on that. Then again, as I don't know, I shouldn't say

I have to say, I don't think it is possible to be INFx without throwing out the whole MBTI theory. I think it is possible that INFP for example, with stronger Te may mistake this for being J.

It's like when I read that INFJs can look like INTJs because they are the most "Thinking" of NFs and whatnot or seem so cold/distant sometimes. That's silly to say be based on...what's it based on? lol

I don't think it correlates with a "J". That's the misperception with "J"s.. "J" being more organized or "P" being less so when that's irrelevant. From Vicky Jo's J/P Discussion speaks on it at length. A bit from her site:

While INFPs are considered perceiving types, in fact, their dominant function is a judging one. While INFJs are considered judging types, in fact, their dominant function is a perceiving one.So if you're poking around inside your head (instead of out in the real world) trying to discover what type you are, this detail can be very misleading. For introverts, the J/P scale is not about how you experience yourself! The J and the P in the code is meant to indicate which one of your functions gets used in the outer world, not your inner one.

I've read people claim Ps are disorganzied and not on time whereas Js are orgnazied and always on time when that's not necessarily so! Both can vary with them. INFJs can be 'consisently' messy w/ their space but know where everything is. INFPs may even go earlier to get to an appt. b/c they know they used to be late. INFJ may want to keep doing "one more thing and one more thing" which may make them late. "Linda Berens has said that NJ often looks like P." So we're not as seemingly orgnaized as other "Js".

And INFPs are SELF-centric whereas INFJs are OTHER-centric (paraphrased from Vicky Jo and it's the INFJ/INFP site). This is why initially, it's easier for INFPs to know their own values (Fi)while it's a bit harder for INFJs who focus on others primarly (Fe).

And the communication styles are vastly different. While both are responding types, INFPs are informing and INFJs are directing. While both do BOTH, they're most comfortable with their preferred one or they learn to become more graceful with the other style. An INFJ may latch on a few more "pleases" and "thankyous"but they are no less directive about it.

 

[zarc]

That Vicky Jos website saved me a lot of stress when I was having my Identity crises a while back.

Now I'm free for other crises that come my way.

Ah, yes, feel free to concentrate on your paranoias about the future too

 

[heart]

DD:It's like when I read that INFJs can look like INTJs because they are the most "Thinking" of NFs and whatnot or seem so cold/distant sometimes. That's silly to say be based on...what's it based on? lol

Male INFJ esepcially can look to non-initmates as INTJ, can be cold/distant to casual onlookers.

 

[hotmale]

Well the difference I've noticed is that INFJs are very analytical, good about discerning people dynamics, and are very helpful in group situations.

An odd coincidence I've noticed about ENFPs- is that they tend to engage in emotional eating and usually are overweight or extremely anorexic looking.

I'm sure I'll get my ass kicked by some ENFP reading this, lol.

 

[theshadow]

Well the difference I've noticed is that INFJs are very analytical, good about discerning people dynamics, and are very helpful in group situations.

An odd coincidence I've noticed about ENFPs- is that they tend to engage in emotional eating and usually are overweight or extremely anorexic looking.

I'm sure I'll get my ass kicked by some ENFP reading this, lol.

I know atleast one enfp like that. and my infj freind is very analytical and usufull in figuring things like the future out.. unlike infp's. I like them and all, I just dont see there purpose. oh look at me Im emo, how dare you make fun of me for being different im special, I dont belong in the world and so what If I am acting like a stereotypical emo kid, im special... on goes the nfp rant

 

[zarc]

I know atleast one enfp like that. and my infj freind is very analytical and usufull in figuring things like the future out.. unlike infp's. I like them and all, I just dont see there purpose. oh look at me Im emo, how dare you make fun of me for being different im special, I dont belong in the world and so what If I am acting like a stereotypical emo kid, im special... on goes the nfp rant

Generalising as you did is useless and mean spirited to do. Not all INFJs are good at being analytical if, for instance, they were treated badly in childhood/at the time or they're reacting in stress as they must 'react' in the moment and we like to think things in advance. Any Type not allowed to flourish naturally or by attentive and caring individuals likely won't develop good social skills (even the INTPs and INTJs w/e the 'least' likely type to do it CAN do it and do it well, it's about 'developing' oneself' as we grow).

INFPs have their purpose and it's rude of you to suggest otherwise. What if someone, other than an INFP, said that ENFJs held no purpose or they were so obnoxious to them? They would be 100% false as well. This is one thing I don't like hearing when any Type is put down as, say, a more vulnerable person who is depressed/unhealthy would then want to associate with the "better" types. Such as those INFPs who are 'emo' and read how "special" and "rare" the INFJ is or their counterpart ENFP is the better type they "should better" be. I don't really like the 'emo' Factory Cult any more than you do, or ANY "cult" group that's popularised by the media and consumers, but I realise that I too can be very "emo" w/e that is, I just don't show it to others and feel sorry all to myself lol. Being depressed occurs to everyone, how you display it is just different. I largely dissociate and turn within or maybe under less stress tell people "I'm okay. I'm doing better." or maybe disclose much more info than I should (it's an INFJ thing so we do it too!). If you want to look at one positive aspect of xNFPs who are 'emo', you could say they are openly demonstrating what was kept surpressed for so long in society or displaying it in a new way. How many people were raised to be 'tough' or 'girly' w/ no inbetween? They created another group from the schizoey punkers or the bubbly Valley Girls (which have made a comeback! ) or the gangsta wankers or Preppies or Ginos and a whole slew of others. People want to belong to w/e group appeals to them. To each their own poison. Even apathetic people who are 'individuals' aren't individual and unique as others are like them! However, we are ALL unique even amongst our own Types as we have different personal histories, observations and insights and interactions w/ or w/o others You are an ENFJ and there is no other ENFJ who will be exactly you. Maybe a twin but never you 100%.

I realise you did say 'rant' so you probably know xNFPs in real life who are very "emo' but please don't generalise them all. Even if you didn't mean for it to apply to all of them, what you say can be interpreted that way as you didn't say "not all xNFPs are like that". Think of those xNFPs who are susceptible to harsh criticism, they'll get hurt by your words and maybe loathe their type in their emo-fashiony way They hold a purpose as much as your Type or my Type does or they wouldn't exist as a Type at all and no Type is better than any other.

This is exactly why I made this Thread. I want to get rid of misconceptions that put down other types as anyone who is vulnerable at the time may become confused, disregard their type and either want to 'trick' themselves into a more praised "better" type or just ignore the whole thing as ridiculous. It's Threads which praise "ISTPs" and "ESFJs" and any other type which gives insight into those types which we may be unaware of or thought useless b/c we normally don't get along with them. But, what we know is ONLY what we know. We don't and can't know everyone or have access to every Type in RL. It gives a chance to realise not EVERYone acts this "___" + "____" or "____" way. Maybe you've met an ENFP/INFP w/o knowing they were and thought they were absolutely terrific. Maybe you've met ENFJs or INFJs who pissed you off or people who didn't like you either for w/e reason, right or wrong. Maybe I'm pissing you off and I'm an INFJ!

So, to INFPs, ENFPs and all Types!

Edit: I orginally had "INFPs" then changed it to "ENFPs" as I over analyzed and there's one example of INFJs overanalyzing and ignoring that first instinct! lolol Or maybe I foresaw that I needed to make that mistake or maybe I'm justifying it w/e. Such fun making mistakes!

 

[zarc]

Well the difference I've noticed is that INFJs are very analytical, good about discerning people dynamics, and are very helpful in group situations.

An odd coincidence I've noticed about ENFPs- is that they tend to engage in emotional eating and usually are overweight or extremely anorexic looking.

I'm sure I'll get my ass kicked by some ENFP reading this, lol.

Nope. You'll get ass kicked by an INFJ reading this Firstly, as I said to theshadow, INFJs can be great at things and bad at things, even their natural Cognitive Processes if not allowed to nourish and flourish them w/o harsh criticism (we're sooo sensitive, when unhealthy, even if we don't show it!). Though you didn't say 'all', it's implied or at least so to me. And you did warn other ENFPs will attack you sooooo....How do you know ENFPs tend to engage in emotional eating? Are they absolutely all obese, lethargic overeaters or are all anorexic-looking, lethargic starvers? You said this is what you noticed but what if you were wrong about their Type? What if they were an ESTJ! Tell me you know every single one on the planet who is verified ENFP and I might just believe you (or believe the facts were distorted in your favour !). Any number of reasons might make an ENFP become emotionally stressed into obesity or anorexia as it can happen to ANY Type!

They are Extroverts! Maybe people oriented but out in the world all the same (they gotta use up a lottaaa energy to do that! I couldn't even keep up if I tried!). Wouldn't it seem more likely that an Introverted Type would stay home depressed, on the couch and emotionally alter their bodies in the extremes or any inbetween? <--- Generalsing too. Why would it be more likely for an Introvert? I've read all sorts of misconceptions that ALL Introverts are SHY or like being indoors 99% of the time or are so emotionally fragile they collectively go to extremes. I read this one article How to Go From Introvert to Extrovert (as the author himself did! And now he's labelled by MBTI as an Extrovert. Please!) b/c of their shyness, inability to speak/be with people or play sports or get outside of their heads b/c they're afraid of the outside world---- Lots of other BS too. Lots of bashing from people, better believe some were Introverts. He believes you can't 'class' people into being I/E or typed. Yet an INFJ is supposed to be PEOPLE oriented and an ISTP (my best friend) are Sensers who are OUT and about, albeit not as much as an ESTP or other Extrovert. We move into more extroverted or introverted activites, modes of being, all the time. To imply that one should change to better themselves is wrong. Why not then write "How To Go From Extrovert to Introvert"? Ah, because it's entirely useless to do so, right? :steam: Generalising is normally just bad and leads to stereotyping which is the aim of this Thread. To dispell that about INFPs or INFJs. The good, bad and ugly of both beautiful types. Careful or I'll make one about ESTJs vs ESTPs!

In America alone, stats reach that 70% of people are overweight/obese. Are they all ENFPs? I'd wager they are a concotion of all Types w/ a slew of different reasons. Not all overweight people or anorexic people are emotionally damaged and cause these weights. It could be illness, hormonal imbalances (esp. for females now!) disease or nutrition that was thought healthy but isn't.

So, please more considerate of labelling one Type in such a way based off your own personal experiences. Saying this is what you've experienced so far in your life is fine but it'd be considerate to say you don't know or wouldn't think all ENFPs are like that. Or if you do, I'll 100% disagree with you and I'm sure ENFPs/other Types will as well.

 

[Ender]

I set INFP as my type since it's the only one I ever get when doing the tests and I've taken it I don't know how many times on dozens of different sites over the years.

In the end tho, the more I've been reading lately about the MBTI types the more I lean towards the fact I'm probably more IXXP since I seem to be split between INFP and ISTP. Observe me when I'm off on my own, and I'm an ISTP, stick me with other people and I'm an INFP.

 

[zarc]

I set INFP as my type since it's the only one I ever get when doing the tests and I've taken it I don't know how many times on dozens of different sites over the years.

In the end tho, the more I've been reading lately about the MBTI types the more I lean towards the fact I'm probably more IXXP since I seem to be split between INFP and ISTP. Observe me when I'm off on my own, and I'm an ISTP, stick me with other people and I'm an INFP.

I fancy myself an expert with ISTPs due to my very muchly ISTP best friend. ISTPs apparently have been touted the most "extroverted" introvert from what I've read. Seems highly likely to me so far. My best friend certainly fools people, unintentionally, into thinking she's more extroverted like them and they will be confused when she boots them out of her life or personal space (invade that, never!). Or when she becomes quiet, observatory or prefers to study a whole night at a time. Or just not care to talk to them. Or when she BLOWS UP! (RUN! Gather children! FLEEEEE!). Or misunderstand that she's happy one moment, criticising someone seemingly abruptly as they're not logically making sense (ISTPs love doing that, methinks) w/o worry of the person's feelings. They're generally very energetic, dissectingly analytical types. Can be fast paced, can be very blunt, unaware of how they come across to others and insenstive (if unhealthy) to care of "feelings" as feelings make them extremely uncomfortable. Fi is their DEMONIC and last process. They don't trust their own feelings anymore than they trust yours lolol Just as I don't trust my Si as it's my demonic process (I vaguely recall what I did ten minutes ago in detail! LOL) or an INFP who distrusts their demonic Ti until better developed. We all improve over time (and I have with my Si....somewhat )

There's a load of difference b/w INFP and ISTP. Have you yet looked at the Cognitive Processes? I don't think being alone would indicate you're an ISTP or being with others an INFP. It could just be you are an ISTP but you have become more aware of your feelings w/o distrusting them all the time and you learned to be aware of other's feelings (not unintentionally trampelling on them ). If relating to your/other's feelings was something you struggled to do or didn't care to do during childhood it may indicate you are an ISTP or maybe even another type. INFP's strongest (Heroic/Leader) CProcess is Fi. They will know their own feelings best, trust them best and no one is telling them otherwise. Not that they wouldn't know others' feelings as they can and will! but theirs is known BEST!! ISTPs LOVE , let alone trust, their Ti as it's their strongest (Heroic/Leader) CProcess (and INFPs weakest! INFP Ti causes :steam: )

Here's an INTJ site which has all the CProcesses neatly charted at the bottom. It has all the Types labelled with both Beebe's archetypal names and Beren's (IMHO better) terminology which makes it seem more 'realistic' to people who distrust archetypal names. Beren's notes a Positive/healthy and Negative/unhealthy name for each CProcess instead of just the 'healthy' 1. Heroic, 2. Good Parent etc. There is, at the top, descriptive info on each CProcess for INTJs (well, INTJ site lol). The site's author explains how both healthy range and unhealthy range shows for INTJs. However, you can apply it to INFP or ISTP as it explains what the order of processes mean, so adjust to both types for healthy AND unhealthy when viewing yourself. I was doing this today with my sis to help her understand her adorable INTJ-self. She was just as much fascinated how it was accurate and dismayed that other people might 'know' her now let alone ME. I've always known her, she has no choice and being 7 yrs older has an advantage! Then again, INxJs are CProcessed cousins so we are TOO similiar sometimes.

Si, being our weakest CProcess, think that we could remember what we said 5minutes ago? NEVER! We war with Si! War! Grrrr