[ENFP] ENFP+INTJ=Disasterous Combo o' love

[garbage]

The other night, I asked this girl if she wanted to dance, and she accepted.

Now, the nature of this dance is that someone "calls out" the moves that we're going to do, often in real time. And I'm pretty new to this particular form of dance.

She asked me if I could handle it. She rolled her eyes at me every time I screwed up. She told me that the terminology and phrasing I used in my dance-related suggestions were "weird."

She also told me to stop smirking. I mean, I can't help but have a little natural smile, and it had nothing to do with her--it's like my default facial expression! :steam:

From her overall demeanor, I'm virtually positive that that was her way of flirting--something along the lines of playful teasing. I dunno, I could just sort of tell what she was going for. Regardless, she poured it on way, way too thick.

I didn't feel like I should ask her out; I felt like I should knock her down a peg or two.

I could tell the difference between someone who was trying to correct my technique--which did happen, of course--and that.

Suffice it to say, I didn't ask her to dance again.

And that's my story.

 

[Qre:us]

^ My INTJ ex flirted through playful insults and telling of unlikely stories. Delivered in stoic dead-pan format, just to watch the other's reaction and falling for such lines.

I would usually respond with no reaction, just seeming acceptance of the bull he was trying to feed, yet, take it up a notch more, and give it "actual serious consideration" by rationalizing the position even further.

To his utter horror.

And, then I could say, "gotcha! Joke's on you, bud."

I didn't feel like I should ask her out; I felt like I should knock her down a peg or two.

Knocking them down means a game of taking it to more extreme than they chose to do.

 

[onemoretime]

^ My INTJ ex flirted through playful insults and telling of unlikely stories. Delivered in stoic dead-pan format, just to watch the other's reaction and falling for such lines.

I would usually respond with no reaction, just seeming acceptance of the bull he was trying to feed, yet, take it up a notch more, and give it "actual serious consideration" by rationalizing the position even further.

To his utter horror.

And, then I could say, "gotcha! Joke's on you, bud."



Knocking them down means a game of taking it to more extreme than they chose to do.

"What, it was your suggestion"

 

[Poki]

The other night, I asked this girl if she wanted to dance, and she accepted.

Now, the nature of this dance is that someone "calls out" the moves that we're going to do, often in real time. And I'm pretty new to this particular form of dance.

She asked me if I could handle it. She rolled her eyes at me every time I screwed up. She told me that the terminology and phrasing I used in my dance-related suggestions were "weird."

She also told me to stop smirking. I mean, I can't help but have a little natural smile, and it had nothing to do with her--it's like my default facial expression! :steam:

From her overall demeanor, I'm virtually positive that that was her way of flirting--something along the lines of playful teasing. I dunno, I could just sort of tell what she was going for. Regardless, she poured it on way, way too thick.

I didn't feel like I should ask her out; I felt like I should knock her down a peg or two.

I could tell the difference between someone who was trying to correct my technique--which did happen, of course--and that.

Suffice it to say, I didn't ask her to dance again.

And that's my story.

So did you have problems determining your right from left when she said "you put your right foot in, you pull your right foot out..."

 

[garbage]

^ My INTJ ex flirted through playful insults and telling of unlikely stories. Delivered in stoic dead-pan format, just to watch the other's reaction and falling for such lines.

I would usually respond with no reaction, just seeming acceptance of the bull he was trying to feed, yet, take it up a notch more, and give it "actual serious consideration" by rationalizing the position even further.

To his utter horror.

And, then I could say, "gotcha! Joke's on you, bud."

Haha, awesome.

I understand that a large part of that mindset is a test. A 'vetting' of sorts.

I would have failed if I had 'tried too hard' to prove her wrong, to convince her that I was actually good with this kind of dance.

I couldn't tell exactly, but I think it slightly screwed with her that I was nonchalant about the whole thing. I kept doing exactly what I was doing, smirking and all.

Knocking them down means a game of taking it to more extreme than they chose to do.

You're exactly right. That's why I chose not to be 'mean' in any way. I mean, I knew what she was going for, even if it wouldn't be how I'd communicate.

I couldn't help but be negatively affected by it.. but that didn't mean that I had to fly off the handle or get back at her.

So did you have problems determining your right from left when she said "you put your right foot in, you pull your right foot out..."

this is a stereotype about iNtuitives' lack of coordination and I won't have any of it

 

[Kalach]

Haha, awesome.

I understand that a large part of that mindset is a test. A 'vetting' of sorts.

If you're talking about what Q is talking about, then you're both assholes.

Telling outlandish stories deadpan is for entertainment. It is, I will hazard to speak for all INTJs, almost never merely an outlandish story, rather it will be a gigantic perspective shift that has at its core something that is still true.

Seems to me it's only vetting in the sense of "Do you play like I play?"

 

[Mr.Time]

Deleted b/c people can't handle the "truth" (whatever that is, of course).

 

[uumlau]

LOL. How can u expect that? Now I don't mean to be rude, but I am going to say it like it is. INTJs (statistically speaking) are intellectually superior to ENFPs. Now we can go into the definition of "intellect" here, but both in the traditional definition of classroom performance and in the definition of (worldly) strategical superiority, INTJs are superior. You want us pretend that you are our equals in these arenas?

In my opinion, all of the problems in the INTJ-ENFP relationship stem from an ENFPs inablility to stop lying (and exaggerating, which in my opinion is the same as lying).

An an intellectually superior INTJ, you wouldn't seriously cast aspersions based on type, would you?

I think you might be exaggerating.

 

[Litvyak]

LOL. How can u expect that? Now I don't mean to be rude, but I am going to say it like it is. INTJs (statistically speaking) are intellectually superior to ENFPs.

Now I don't mean to be rude, but I am going to say it like it is: you're a retard.
Strictly statistically speaking, of course.

ETA: Oh wait, you're the guy who got pwned by that ENFP chick, right? Get over your Weltschmerz, comforting yourself won't help a thing.

 

[garbage]

If you're talking about what Q is talking about, then you're both assholes.

Telling outlandish stories deadpan is for entertainment. It is, I will hazard to speak for all INTJs, almost never merely an outlandish story, rather it will be a gigantic perspective shift that has at its core something that is still true.

Seems to me it's only vetting in the sense of "Do you play like I play?"

Are you trying to imply that we're assholes because we don't play that way or respond as the INTJs would have us respond? From my perspective, the "asshole" thing to do is to make such disparaging comments in the first place. Even still, I didn't particularly judge her very harshly at all--I just left her alone.

I don't like playing that way. I chose not to do it. That was most of my point.

LOL. How can u expect that? Now I don't mean to be rude, but I am going to say it like it is. INTJs (statistically speaking) are intellectually superior to ENFPs. Now we can go into the definition of "intellect" here, but both in the traditional definition of classroom performance and in the definition of (worldly) strategical superiority, INTJs are superior. You want us pretend that you are our equals in these arenas?

In my opinion, all of the problems in the INTJ-ENFP relationship stem from an ENFPs inablility to stop lying (and exaggerating, which in my opinion is the same as lying).

So should I make the point that I want to make here by refuting your terrible logic or correcting your terrible spelling and grammar?

 

[Kalach]

Are you trying to imply that we're assholes because we don't play that way or respond as the INTJs would have us respond? From my perspective, the "asshole" thing to do is to make such disparaging comments in the first place. Even still, I didn't particularly judge her very harshly at all--I just left her alone.

I don't like playing that way. I chose not to do it. That was most of my point.

Q was talking about the outlandish stories, you're talking about something else, something about different ways of managing the physical world and whatever over-compensation the various people used. The asshole could be anyone in that story, maybe the DJ.




*sigh* No one's an asshole. Our Difts Giffer.

 

[Poki]

Q was talking about the outlandish stories, you're talking about something else, something about different ways of managing the physical world and whatever over-compensation the various people used. The asshole could be anyone in that story, maybe the DJ.




*sigh* No one's an asshole. Our Difts Giffer.

*sigh* Your a pretty fart smeller

 

[Kalach]

LOL





(But it took me a minute. Hassole)

 

[SillySapienne]

*sigh* No one's an asshole. Our Difts Giffer.

Bullshit, I think there are scenarios/circumstances where one can say, with utmost confidence, that person x, y, or z was, in fact, being a complete asshole.

It's called accountability.

Sometimes, I make mistakes, when in a bad mood, or oblivious, and guess what, sometimes I hurt people, and when that becomes clear to me, I OWN UP TO MY WRONG-DOINGS, AND APOLOGIZE.

Ugh, there is NOTHING WORSE, than someone who REFUSES to ACCEPT ACCOUNTABILITY FOR THEIR ACTIONS!!!

Nothing.

:rolli:

 

[Qre:us]

If you're talking about what Q is talking about, then you're both assholes.

Pretty much, I'm trying to out-asshole the INTJ, at that point, though - for entertainment. He set the level of assholishness, I'm gonna one-up that....for fun. He wants reactions from me, I'm going to turn it on its head and make him the reactionary.

Telling outlandish stories deadpan is for entertainment. It is, I will hazard to speak for all INTJs, almost never merely an outlandish story, rather it will be a gigantic perspective shift that has at its core something that is still true.

That's the formula for pretty much all jokes, the hint of truth masked in other layers. That doesn't mean I should give the joke only serious consideration (I see beyond the dead-pan); it would be disrespectful to the joke. And, we can't have that. No, sir.

Seems to me it's only vetting in the sense of "Do you play like I play?"

The other can play any way they like, but, shouldn't expect me to therefore, play by their rules, or they cry about it, when I don't. My mode of playing is, if they're trying to make the joke on me, I'm going to turn it, to be a joke on them.

joke for JOKE.

Don't get all hurt feelings over it, you started it. And, I'm gonna finish it.

(there's a place for jokes, and serious conversations....knowing the difference is key. When it's "joking time" - all bets are off.)

 

[uumlau]

Bullshit, I think there are scenarios/circumstances where one can say, with utmost confidence, that person x, y, or z was, in fact, being a complete asshole.

It's called accountability.

Sometimes, I make mistakes, when in a bad mood, or oblivious, and guess what, sometimes I hurt people, and when that becomes clear to me, I OWN UP TO MY WRONG-DOINGS, AND APOLOGIZE.

Ugh, there is NOTHING WORSE, than someone who REFUSES to ACCEPT ACCOUNTABILITY FOR THEIR ACTIONS!!!

Nothing.

:rolli:

Agreed. There's a difference between people of two different MBTI types having a misunderstanding due to different ways of processing the same info, and ubiquitous immaturity on either party's part.

The useful part of MBTI is that you can resolve a misunderstanding, but it still won't help much for getting along with real jerks.

 

[Thalassa]

Are you trying to imply that we're assholes because we don't play that way or respond as the INTJs would have us respond? From my perspective, the "asshole" thing to do is to make such disparaging comments in the first place. Even still, I didn't particularly judge her very harshly at all--I just left her alone.

I don't like playing that way. I chose not to do it. That was most of my point.

Being an asshole can be funny (as long as its funny). I actually prefer someone with a dark sense of humor. If you can't play around that way, then you're right to stay away from someone like that, because they'll just hurt your feelings and you'll irritate them by not getting their jokes, and possibly even hurt their feelings by striking back too harshly.

 

[Poki]

Being an asshole can be funny (as long as its funny). I actually prefer someone with a dark sense of humor. If you can't play around that way, then you're right to stay away from someone like that, because they'll just hurt your feelings and you'll irritate them by not getting their jokes, and possibly even hurt their feelings by striking back too harshly.

Being an asshole works when the other person knows that thats not how you really are. Now if you joke in a way you are then it can get extremely confusing. So if you really are an asshole, you are gonna have a hard time playing an asshole as a joke. Your better off playing sweet, because you will then really throw people off.

 

[Laurie]

Can I get cliff notes?

 

[Poki]

Can I get cliff notes?

Fight...Argue...Fight...Argue...Sucker Punch...Jokes...Derail...Jokes....Fight....Tension....Argue....Jokes

edit: oh were you wondering about the ENFP-INTJ thing? I got hung up on the NFP-ENTP thing.