Type my guy friend/guy I like

[CakeByTheOcean]

He just melts my heart... Anyway, some things about him.

• He says he doesn't show emotion, & that only things that have to do with his mom can make him cry
• He's protective of his mom & his little sister, & would risk anything to make sure they're ok
• He says he had anger issues when he was younger & used to get in trouble for fighting
• He's in the military & wants to be an officer
• He's majoring in sports management
• He used to play football
• He's very direct & even asked one of my guy friends that he suspected liked me how long he planned to be with me relationship wise
• He is huge on respect & accuses me of being disrespectful when I hurt his feelings
• He says that a girl has to have set goals in mind for him to be with her
• He already has a list of baby names he likes for his future child
• He is very logical & often tells me to think & says my logic's bad
• He likes to go down by the water to think, & opened up all about his past, his family, & his past girlfriends with me when I took a walk on the bridge with him
• He usually ducks off to his room, instead of hanging in the dorm lounge with the big group of us
• He sometimes gets a bit frustrated when I hold his hand, because he says it's a sign of a relationship(but I think this was only because I wouldn't tell him if I had feelings for him)
• He says that kissing is sentimental, & that he doesn't kiss many people
• He keeps a straight face a lot of the time, but I swear when he smiles his eyes light up(& he smiles quite a bit around me)

Thoughts on what his type could be?

 

[Estelia]

maybe ISTJ.

 

[Punderstorm]

IxTJ? S and N is unclear.

 

[Duffy]

I'm thinking Si-dom as well, but I lean towards ISFJ.

 

[Estelia]

I'm thinking Si-dom as well, but I lean towards ISFJ.

I was considering ISFJ too actually tbh

 

[Cloudpatrol]

I was thinking ISFJ (mebbe ISTJ...) also.

There are a several points from your description that make me lean toward thinking this is a QUALITY guy:

He's protective of his mom & his little sister, & would risk anything to make sure they're ok
He says he had anger issues when he was younger & used to get in trouble for fighting
He's very direct & even asked one of my guy friends that he suspected liked me how long he planned to be with me relationship wise
He is huge on respect & accuses me of being disrespectful when I hurt his feelings
He says that a girl has to have set goals in mind for him to be with her
He is very logical & often tells me to think & says my logic's bad
He sometimes gets a bit frustrated when I hold his hand, because he says it's a sign of a relationship(but I think this was only because I wouldn't tell him if I had feelings for him)
He says that kissing is sentimental, & that he doesn't kiss many people
He keeps a straight face a lot of the time, but I swear when he smiles his eyes light up(& he smiles quite a bit around me)

I have had a friend since childhood who shares many of these traits and is intensely loyal. He also gets hurt deeply, more so than his direct manner would seem to indicate. Girls sometimes play games with him (try to make him jealous by seeking attention from other guy's etc.) and these ploys always BACKFIRE immediately.

Is he social enough for you? Do you value when he encourages you to be more logical? Communicates that he feels disrespected?

It sounds like he trusts you and can be open about the things that matter to him

Did you not tell him that you had feelings because you aren't entirely sure of his? (Please ignore this question if it feels intrusive or beyond the scope of what you wanted to address )

 

[Annaifiwas]

IxxJ for sure. I'm thinking some Fi qualities, so... INTJ or ISTJ.
N/S is harder... IxTJ.

 

[CakeByTheOcean]

[MENTION=27162]Cloudpatrol[/MENTION]
Yes, he's social enough for me. We hung out for hours one on one almost every day of spring semester. Those are my favorite times with him, anyway. Sometimes I check on him when he ducks off, & he just says he's good & to go hang out with my friends.

I appreciate that he tries to push me to better myself. Sometimes our ways of navagating things are very different, but I know he's always coming from a good place.

Yes, I wasn't sure just what he felt for me. I mean, he told me quite awhile back that he liked me, but at the time I didn't really feel the same & told him we were just friends. I also wasn't entirely sure what I wanted us to be, so I didn't want him to take me saying I like him as that I want to be in a relationship with him. I ended up telling him that I like him during a long car ride after I had a few drinks (he drove & wasn't drinking).

 

[CakeByTheOcean]

More about him...

• He tells me to be more emotionally strong
• He expects me to be 100% honest with him about any other guys in my life right away, without him having to ask(which we sometimes clash on, because I remind him that we're not dating)
• He's always upfront about anything he does with another girl
• Funny story: For April Fools I played a pregnancy joke on him, & his first response was "welcome to the family" & was completely calm. He later whispered to me "if you ever were, that's exactly how I would react" (which I thought was very sweet )
• It's practically impossible to freak him out, & he thinks pythons & hyenas are cool
• While talking about the military, he told me he's not afraid of dying

 

[fetus]

ISTJ.

 

[hjgbujhghg]

ESTJ maybe... not sure why people here type him as I>E.

 

[Forever]

ESTJ maybe... not sure why people here type him as I>E.

I'm actually with you Mona. Extroverts can go to their room alone too.

 

[HongDou]

Seems like he has an In-Charge interaction style and fits the SJ temperament most so, ESTJ imo.