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[Tonitrum]

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[Earl Grey]

@Charus What is the purpose of this thread? Open discussion? Vent?

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

I'm an ISFP Enneagram 4 wing 5.

As the title says it all, I strongly dislike my personality type. Why you ask? It feels like nothing is special about my personality.

I envy the other personality types because they all have qualities for them; The INTJ is very good at planning, organising and is highly disciplined, he is the mastermind. The ENTJ is powerful, driven and hardworking, who runs the company with his henchmen in his gang. ESTP is assertive, a life of the party, a literal warrior.

Then what the ISFP is? A directionless piece of crap that is only good with art and music? Thats extremely lame.

Yeah, I know. Thats the whole point and drama the revolves around the Enneagram 4, the fear of lacking identity, which exactly manifests in this thread, and I hate it.

When I discovered Personality theory, I was hoping to find out that I am something cool and awesome, discover something magical, instead I discovered that I am just a piece of turd with no personality and identity whatsoever, at this point I just want to forget about MBTI and Enneagram and return to what I was before I discovered personality theory, because I hated myself way less when I didnt knew what is my personality type and the knowledge that I am just a piece of turd.

I'm also a guy, a male, so that makes it much worse. Like when I am next to a woman who happens to be something like an INTJ, ESTP or ENTJ, I just feel inferior to her, like I have little masculinity, like I am some effeminate boy standing next to a powerful ENTJ woman who can probably beat me, I envy those women so much, they have something that should be mine, It's like my masculinity card is being taken away. I am a guy, I am supposed to be assertive, a charmer and be the one providing for a woman, but instead it feels like I have the personality type of a little girl.

type is irrelevant to masculinity and strength. Not to beat the same old tired trope, but there's something to the "bro, just lift" memes. It's not about achieving a comical level of physical strength and being some idea of a social alpha with a bulky physical frame, but working on self-improvement and self-discipline go a long way. Type is irrelevant. What is important is that you are someone who can learn to set boundaries and not take unnecessary shit from others. That will make you sexy to a lot of women, some ENTJ ones included. ExTJ women I've known actually hate pushover men. They may act like they want that, but nothing closes legs faster than being a pushover who goes along with everything she says. It's not about dominating or being some archaic red pill ideal of masculinity though. Just be firm in your own boundaries and respect your self. My wife used to talk shit about overly controlling, dominant men, so I mistakenly took that to mean I should be a yes man, agree with her on everything, and be submissive all the time. I started setting boundaries and expressing my own opinions. Sure, she doesn't always agree, and sometimes it leads to arguments, but more importantly, she respects me and I get more sex and affection than I did when I was pushover nice guy man.

Look at some famous examples of high achieving ISFP males. Those are some potential role models you can learn from. Many are considered quite masculine and attractive.

You want to be something cool and unique, work on yourself, pursue the hobbies and interests you love unapologetically. Don't expect to just be cool or unique or attractive by virtue of the type you were born as. There's plenty of INTJ and ESTP people who are unemployed losers with no interesting achievements--the ones who achieve and are seen as cool and unique also had to work to get to that stage. Believe yourself to be a powerless little child and that's how you will be seen by others. You have to make yourself the protagonist in your own story instead of waiting for life to hand you what you wish you had.

Your journey begins now. Good luck.

 

[Maou]

I'm an ISFP Enneagram 4 wing 5.

As the title says it all, I strongly dislike my personality type. Why you ask? It feels like nothing is special about my personality.

I envy the other personality types because they all have qualities for them; The INTJ is very good at planning, organising and is highly disciplined, he is the mastermind. The ENTJ is powerful, driven and hardworking, who runs the company with his henchmen in his gang. ESTP is assertive, a life of the party, a literal warrior.

Then what the ISFP is? A directionless piece of crap that is only good with art and music? Thats extremely lame.

Yeah, I know. Thats the whole point and drama the revolves around the Enneagram 4, the fear of lacking identity, which exactly manifests in this thread, and I hate it.

When I discovered Personality theory, I was hoping to find out that I am something cool and awesome, discover something magical, instead I discovered that I am just a piece of turd with no personality and identity whatsoever, at this point I just want to forget about MBTI and Enneagram and return to what I was before I discovered personality theory, because I hated myself way less when I didnt knew what is my personality type and the knowledge that I am just a piece of turd.

I'm also a guy, a male, so that makes it much worse. Like when I am next to a woman who happens to be something like an INTJ, ESTP or ENTJ, I just feel inferior to her, like I have little masculinity, like I am some effeminate boy standing next to a powerful ENTJ woman who can probably beat me, I envy those women so much, they have something that should be mine, It's like my masculinity card is being taken away. I am a guy, I am supposed to be assertive, a charmer and be the one providing for a woman, but instead it feels like I have the personality type of a little girl.

Then change. The personality typing is a theory, not a fact and a destiny. If you don't like something about yourself, then change it. You applied those labels to yourself, they don't have to be your reality.

You need to look at yourself outside of the perspective of MBTI.

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

I've been identifying as INFP with Enneagram 4 and think it's great. I feel creative, autonomous, quietly unusual, and not that dependent on what other people think.

As far as male ISFPs go, I personally think Kurt Cobain was one in spades, and he was plenty awesome.

 

[Vendrah]

I'm an ISFP Enneagram 4 wing 5.

As the title says it all, I strongly dislike my personality type. Why you ask? It feels like nothing is special about my personality.

I envy the other personality types because they all have qualities for them; The INTJ is very good at planning, organising and is highly disciplined, he is the mastermind. The ENTJ is powerful, driven and hardworking, who runs the company with his henchmen in his gang. ESTP is assertive, a life of the party, a literal warrior.

Then what the ISFP is? A directionless piece of crap that is only good with art and music? Thats extremely lame.

Yeah, I know. Thats the whole point and drama the revolves around the Enneagram 4, the fear of lacking identity, which exactly manifests in this thread, and I hate it.

When I discovered Personality theory, I was hoping to find out that I am something cool and awesome, discover something magical, instead I discovered that I am just a piece of turd with no personality and identity whatsoever, at this point I just want to forget about MBTI and Enneagram and return to what I was before I discovered personality theory, because I hated myself way less when I didnt knew what is my personality type and the knowledge that I am just a piece of turd.

I'm also a guy, a male, so that makes it much worse. Like when I am next to a woman who happens to be something like an INTJ, ESTP or ENTJ, I just feel inferior to her, like I have little masculinity, like I am some effeminate boy standing next to a powerful ENTJ woman who can probably beat me, I envy those women so much, they have something that should be mine, It's like my masculinity card is being taken away. I am a guy, I am supposed to be assertive, a charmer and be the one providing for a woman, but instead it feels like I have the personality type of a little girl.

I know you don't like me although that's from personality cafe (on one of my very few appearences there), so I will be brief.
I don't think I said earlier, however, per big five there are the facets 'competency' from conscientiousness and facet 'modesty' from agreeableness. Modesty you know what is, competency is actually not how competent you are - that's not measured by self-report - but rather how competent you believe you are. Low Modesty and High Competency implies a person with high self-esteem while High Modesty and Low Competency implies with low self-esteem. This impacts directly what you're going to read on MBTI and indirectly on the enneagram. High Competency and Low Modesty is ENTJ and tends to be a 3 or 8 on enneagram, that's exactly what is voted on personality database for 'best type' or something like that. High Modesty and Low Competency does converge to ISFP on MBTI and one enneagram diverges a bit, have E4 and E9 as the best candidates as far as I remember, which hits what you typed yourself today.

So, if you "loath" yourself in a sense, you are going to fall to the same type until the day you won't. Now, a good bunch of your life outcomes - intelligence, job performance, etc... - not only are not heavily dependent but also are surprisingly not well predicted by Competency and Modesty facets. So, for example, on Hogan the type with highest job performance is surprisingly translated roughly by RCUAN on popular similar mind's SLOAN terms, which actually is expected to have a lower self-esteem to some degree (and its a hundred miles away for ENTJ - ENTJ RCUAN are not even compatible unless average type/all-close-to-average scores). Or in another sense the smartest type on MBTI is not ENTJ, yet INTP which is close to the INFP (which have people who a lot of times don't see themselves as smart and even at times as dumb).


THat's it in resume with me NOT wasting time to find the links and explain in depth where the statitics of what I said comes from.

 

[ceecee]

I'm an ISFP Enneagram 4 wing 5.

As the title says it all, I strongly dislike my personality type. Why you ask? It feels like nothing is special about my personality.

I envy the other personality types because they all have qualities for them; The INTJ is very good at planning, organising and is highly disciplined, he is the mastermind. The ENTJ is powerful, driven and hardworking, who runs the company with his henchmen in his gang. ESTP is assertive, a life of the party, a literal warrior.

Then what the ISFP is? A directionless piece of crap that is only good with art and music? Thats extremely lame.

Yeah, I know. Thats the whole point and drama the revolves around the Enneagram 4, the fear of lacking identity, which exactly manifests in this thread, and I hate it.

When I discovered Personality theory, I was hoping to find out that I am something cool and awesome, discover something magical, instead I discovered that I am just a piece of turd with no personality and identity whatsoever, at this point I just want to forget about MBTI and Enneagram and return to what I was before I discovered personality theory, because I hated myself way less when I didnt knew what is my personality type and the knowledge that I am just a piece of turd.

I'm also a guy, a male, so that makes it much worse. Like when I am next to a woman who happens to be something like an INTJ, ESTP or ENTJ, I just feel inferior to her, like I have little masculinity, like I am some effeminate boy standing next to a powerful ENTJ woman who can probably beat me, I envy those women so much, they have something that should be mine, It's like my masculinity card is being taken away. I am a guy, I am supposed to be assertive, a charmer and be the one providing for a woman, but instead it feels like I have the personality type of a little girl.

Start developing your weaker traits. I personally prefer enneagram as it looks at personality as a whole, the good and the bad. The other positive is that it shows your weakness so you can look at ways to strengthen them. But you need to get away from this version of masculinity you have in your head. It's not only untrue, it's terribly destructive to you. If left to fester, it can become destructive to others as well. People also grow and change throughout life, with more experiences and more knowledge. Plus nothing I read in from any enneagram site said 4w5's lack identity.

Enneagram 4w5 - Enneagram Universe

Enneagram 4w5 -The Bohemian- Enneagram type 4 wing 5: The Bohemian is a subtype resulting from the encounter of types 4 and 5. This means that to the amazing ability to create that exists in 4s inner atmosphere we add 5's limitless speculation. The Bohemian is described as being less outgoing...

enneagramuniverse.com

 

[Tonitrum]

Welp, even worse now. I figured out I am actualy an INFP instead of an ISFP, this is honestly worse.

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

Start developing your weaker traits. I personally prefer enneagram as it looks at personality as a whole, the good and the bad. The other positive is that it shows your weakness so you can look at ways to strengthen them. But you need to get away from this version of masculinity you have in your head. It's not only untrue, it's terribly destructive to you. If left to fester, it can become destructive to others as well. People also grow and change throughout life, with more experiences and more knowledge. Plus nothing I read in from any enneagram site said 4w5's lack identity.

Enneagram 4w5 - Enneagram Universe

Enneagram 4w5 -The Bohemian- Enneagram type 4 wing 5: The Bohemian is a subtype resulting from the encounter of types 4 and 5. This means that to the amazing ability to create that exists in 4s inner atmosphere we add 5's limitless speculation. The Bohemian is described as being less outgoing...

enneagramuniverse.com

I have my issues with enneagram but I do appreciate that it looks at potential for growth. That's a big shortcoming in the 4 letter systems. They're too focused on presenting rigid archetypes for each type and then people get hung up on identifying with those archetypes instead of using the system for its original intended purposes.

I think OP needs to take a break from looking at typology systems altogether and just focus on self improvement and self love.

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

Welp, even worse now. I figured out I am actualy an INFP instead of an ISFP, this is honestly worse.

Why? Perhaps you need to take some time away from reading about the systems and just focus on doing you. Find your passions, pursue them, and focus on being the best version of you. Stop feeling like a victim and start aspiring to be the protagonist in your life.

 

[Tonitrum]

I have my issues with enneagram but I do appreciate that it looks at potential for growth. That's a big shortcoming in the 4 letter systems. They're too focused on presenting rigid archetypes for each type and then people get hung up on identifying with those archetypes instead of using the system for its original intended purposes.

Yes, thats the thing. The cognitive functions of INFP match me the best, but the 16p stereotypes and maskot just doesnt suit me at all, they trying to portray my personality type as this helpless little naive girl thing which makes me cringe to hell on how it feels infantilising.

No, I'm not a crybaby, no I am capable of using logic and I'm not on my emotions 24/7 hours a day, I'm independent and not a helpless; "Naive" and/or "Wimpy" as how INFP's are depicted as. It's the reason why I never really identified with the stereotypical INFP archetype and instead identified myself with INTx, because most of It's descriptions and stereotypes felt very revolting for the INFP.

Why do ENTJ's get a mascot that feels like it could literaly beat everyone? Why INTJ's get a 16p mascot that is literaly a mysterious guy who is excelent in strategizing? Why is the INFP portrayed as some helpless little naive cutesy girl?

Why? Perhaps you need to take some time away from reading about the systems and just focus on doing you. Find your passions, pursue them, and focus on being the best version of you. Stop feeling like a victim and start aspiring to be the protagonist in your life.

I can't feel secure about having the personality type of a little girl, sorry not sorry. Doesnt help that INFP's also have a shitty representation in fiction and media, we are always some sort of helpless outcast that gets bullied or something, easy for you to say that when you are not an INFP yourself, try to be the most weakest and most useless personality type ever.

 

[GoggleGirl17]

As an ISFP 4 myself, what I'm hearing from you when you say that 1) you felt better about yourself before you started worrying about typology and 2) you don't like the way your type is portrayed, is that fundamentally you don't really believe these things are true about yourself, and that the real issue is you have a fear of how others perceive you and are letting that influence your perception of yourself based on how you assume others are judging you. People are not tropes. If you know you're not the stereotypical IxFP mascot, then you're not. Personally I don't think you want to be someone you're not. I think you want to feel seen and appreciated for who you are while still being given room to grow on your own terms, but you think that nobody will want or respect you unless you fit some idolized trope to the T. Nobody is really like this. Every human is different. When we genuinely aspire to be something, part of us believes we are already that thing, and it's just a matter of changing our reactions to line up externally with our own self-image. When we say we envy someone else, we're just wanting what we think we can't have unless we are like them. Stop idolizing. This is an issue that transcends personality theory; that is just your current fixation.

 

[KurtCobain]

Get some bloodwork done, including cholesterol, B vitamins, Vitamin D, Testosterone, Magnesium, Zinc, blood sugar, and a full metabolic panel. You may be lacking something essential a doctor can help with.

 

[Vendrah]

Why do ENTJ's get a mascot that feels like it could literaly beat everyone?

I almost literally explained it in my post earlier.

easy for you to say that when you are not an INFP yourself, try to be the most weakest and most useless personality type ever.

I already explained earlier either, whatever you have a self-report pattern you will feel weak, useless, etc... This is going to be translated and passed on your self-report on any system basically yet the real life outcomes hardly ever correlates with levels of self-esteem, there are a bunch of people who overestimate their capabilities for example.

 

[ceecee]

I can't feel secure about having the personality type of a little girl, sorry not sorry. Doesnt help that INFP's also have a shitty representation in fiction and media, we are always some sort of helpless outcast that gets bullied or something, easy for you to say that when you are not an INFP yourself, try to be the most weakest and most useless personality type ever.

Do you actually think the other types don't get bullied or treated badly? You don't take any responsibility for your shit attitude or the way you talk to others, even ones that were trying to help you but you expect to keep receiving the help by acting like a total ball lick. Go pound sand.

 

[Tonitrum]

I think much bigger issue here is not developing the stronger traits. It sounds like overt focus on Te and Si if INFP.

I dont really believe in function loops or inferior grips, even if grips may be a thing, they happen during stress, and even so It's episodic and not something chronic. An INFP still prefers to use Fi and Ne over Si and Te, it doesnt make sense for INFP to neglect their Fi and Ne when It is their stronger functions anyway. If someone thinks they are an INFP and they have stronger focus on Si or Te, then they are not INFP, simple as that, It's called mistype.

Even so, I've choosen INFP because of Fi - Si alone, I may not be so sure about being aux Ne because I dont feel as if my Ne is strong, I even think that my Ni and Se is stronger than Ne, I think my functions is something like this; Fi = Ti > Si > Se = Ni > Te > Ne > Fe. (Fi and Ti are equaly strong because I seem to have preference for both, sometimes I conflate my own logic and sense with personal feelings, which sometimes I think I may be an Ti dom, which I am not sure).

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

personally, I envy INFPs and ISFPs. It boggles me that someone would be ashamed of being either.

 

[Tonitrum]

personally, I envy INFPs and ISFPs. It boggles me that someone would be ashamed of being either.

I just simply completely disagree with the way they are described online, as I simply cannot relate to those. Either the descriptions are really wrong, or I am mistyped and need to research my type again (Hopefully the latter).

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

I just simply completely disagree with the way they are described online, as I simply cannot relate to those. Either the descriptions are really wrong, or I am mistyped and need to research my type again (Hopefully the latter).

My advice is to avoid type descriptions. They all do a disservice to their types, even the ones that supposedly glamorize and build up types like ESTP and ENTJ.

Live your life, be the best person you can be, and in doing so, you prove all of those stupid descriptions to be wrong.

 

[Tonitrum]

My advice is to avoid type descriptions. They all do a disservice to their types, even the ones that supposedly glamorize and build up types like ESTP and ENTJ.

Live your life, be the best person you can be, and in doing so, you prove all of those stupid descriptions to be wrong.

Just in my opinion, I think the MBTI officials who make those descriptions need to realise that no one is gonna fit those descriptions 100%, my issue and concern with those online descriptions is how they can affect a person negatively when the descriptions of their personality type feels very unappealing and somewhat unfitting or negative, not only that, it creates this false narative about the types which massively influences the perception of the personality type by the community it'self, so thus more and more stereotyping and circle-jerking occurs, I dont think ignoring it will magicaly solve it, It's like an Ostrich putting It's head into the sand because it thinks it will help it to hide from danger; newsflash it wont, as it wont change the tbias that occurs in the typology sphere around the personality archetypes and eventualy bullying that would occur from the result, such as being called dumb because I am an INFP and my opinion does not matter because Fi cannot think.