INTPness
New member
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2009
- Messages
- 2,157
- MBTI Type
- INTP
- Enneagram
- 5w4
I was reading another thread in this forum which mentioned the possibility that ENTP's might underestimate the importance of Ti, while INTP's might tend to underestimate the importance of Ne.
I don't think that I underestimate the value of my Ne (I know it's my way of connecting with people and the outside world, and it's also good to get out of my own head). But, one of my problems seems to be actually being able to CONNECT with people when I do use my Ne. I have found that when I'm talking to another primary or secondary Ne user, we usually connect extremely well - but that only includes 4 of the 16 types (and not a large percentage of the overall population). With the other 12 types, I don't connect very well. I want to connect with people more often, but I find that instead of my Ne "connecting", it feels more like the other person is "missing" what I'm saying - or I'm "missing" my target. I can almost use the analogy of swinging a baseball bat. When I use Ne with other Ne users, I connect with the baseball and the baseball goes far. When I use my Ne with others, it's like I just can't quite seem to hit the ball. I've learned to not care as much. If I feel that I "missed" in a given situation, then I just move on and not let it bother me too much (there are times, when I choose to actually reflect on it, that it seems a bit sad, pathetic, and depressing) - basically, I've learned to live with it.
But, I think that I have gotten to a point where I more or less "expect" to miss - I might think, "I'd like to join in and conversate with that group" (whether it be friends/acquaintances/or a business situation), but then I'll just think, "95% chance it will be awkward or they won't get me, so I'm just going to go on my way".
So, the question is: how do you use your Ne to connect with "the masses"? In particular, the 8 "S" types? When you know that you don't have much in common with a group or an individual, but it's still important (or otherwise desirable) to connect with them, how do you do it? Tips? Pointers? What if you start to use Ne and you get the vibe that they aren't getting you or they think you're eccentric? Do you continue to use your Ne or do you try to mix in some other function(s) to meet them half way?
I don't think that I underestimate the value of my Ne (I know it's my way of connecting with people and the outside world, and it's also good to get out of my own head). But, one of my problems seems to be actually being able to CONNECT with people when I do use my Ne. I have found that when I'm talking to another primary or secondary Ne user, we usually connect extremely well - but that only includes 4 of the 16 types (and not a large percentage of the overall population). With the other 12 types, I don't connect very well. I want to connect with people more often, but I find that instead of my Ne "connecting", it feels more like the other person is "missing" what I'm saying - or I'm "missing" my target. I can almost use the analogy of swinging a baseball bat. When I use Ne with other Ne users, I connect with the baseball and the baseball goes far. When I use my Ne with others, it's like I just can't quite seem to hit the ball. I've learned to not care as much. If I feel that I "missed" in a given situation, then I just move on and not let it bother me too much (there are times, when I choose to actually reflect on it, that it seems a bit sad, pathetic, and depressing) - basically, I've learned to live with it.
But, I think that I have gotten to a point where I more or less "expect" to miss - I might think, "I'd like to join in and conversate with that group" (whether it be friends/acquaintances/or a business situation), but then I'll just think, "95% chance it will be awkward or they won't get me, so I'm just going to go on my way".
So, the question is: how do you use your Ne to connect with "the masses"? In particular, the 8 "S" types? When you know that you don't have much in common with a group or an individual, but it's still important (or otherwise desirable) to connect with them, how do you do it? Tips? Pointers? What if you start to use Ne and you get the vibe that they aren't getting you or they think you're eccentric? Do you continue to use your Ne or do you try to mix in some other function(s) to meet them half way?