INTPness
New member
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2009
- Messages
- 2,157
- MBTI Type
- INTP
- Enneagram
- 5w4
ESTP's, need your help!
A good friend of mine that I work with is ESTP. He is in his early 60's and is getting treated HORRIBLY at work. We have an ESTJ boss who is turning out to be a real piece of work - everyone hates him and people are talking about getting together and writing a letter to his boss - basically ratting him out because we don't know what else to do.
The ESTJ is basically trying to push the ESTP to quit/retire. He's treating him unfairly, calls him "an old man who needs to retire already", tells him he is slow, basically criticizes him really bad. Personally, I wouldn't want to mess with the ESTP - even in his 60's. He was in Vietnam and I don't think I'd want to see him when he's really mad. But, he just keeps tolerating it because he can't win in this situation. The supervisor has too much power. The only way he can win is to be a rat - and I think that goes against his moral code. But, he told me that he's seriously considering it.
But, the ESTP is so frustrated that he's now taking every single day off of work. He makes up lame excuses to not be at work and we all know that he's making it up - but it's maddening because it creates SO MUCH extra work for everyone else when he isn't there. I told him, "Look buddy, I understand your pain. I really do. But, I can't keep doing all of your work or else I'm going to go nuts and I'm going to quit. I just can't do your job AND mine every day." He just says, "I feel your pain, but I need to go to the doctor, I need to go do this and do that, blah, blah, blah." He just keeps missing work (he has a ton of vacation time saved up).
What do you guys think his frame of mind is right now? When you guys are extremely frustrated do you just say, "Screw everyone else - I'm going to look out for me, myself, and I and everyone else will just have to take care of themselves"??? I'm seeing a selfish side of him. I told him that I want a day off next week so he can't take every day off and he goes, "I don't care what you want. I'm taking it off!"
I feel for the guy, but I want him to suck it up like we all are and not screw us over.
Advice??? Anything I can say to him that might help him get through this? And what if I "get tough" with him and start saying things like, "you're going to have to suck this up like the rest of us. We need you at work! Stop whimping out on us and get to work!" Is that going to make him mad or do ESTP's respect it when someone shoots straight with them?
A good friend of mine that I work with is ESTP. He is in his early 60's and is getting treated HORRIBLY at work. We have an ESTJ boss who is turning out to be a real piece of work - everyone hates him and people are talking about getting together and writing a letter to his boss - basically ratting him out because we don't know what else to do.
The ESTJ is basically trying to push the ESTP to quit/retire. He's treating him unfairly, calls him "an old man who needs to retire already", tells him he is slow, basically criticizes him really bad. Personally, I wouldn't want to mess with the ESTP - even in his 60's. He was in Vietnam and I don't think I'd want to see him when he's really mad. But, he just keeps tolerating it because he can't win in this situation. The supervisor has too much power. The only way he can win is to be a rat - and I think that goes against his moral code. But, he told me that he's seriously considering it.
But, the ESTP is so frustrated that he's now taking every single day off of work. He makes up lame excuses to not be at work and we all know that he's making it up - but it's maddening because it creates SO MUCH extra work for everyone else when he isn't there. I told him, "Look buddy, I understand your pain. I really do. But, I can't keep doing all of your work or else I'm going to go nuts and I'm going to quit. I just can't do your job AND mine every day." He just says, "I feel your pain, but I need to go to the doctor, I need to go do this and do that, blah, blah, blah." He just keeps missing work (he has a ton of vacation time saved up).
What do you guys think his frame of mind is right now? When you guys are extremely frustrated do you just say, "Screw everyone else - I'm going to look out for me, myself, and I and everyone else will just have to take care of themselves"??? I'm seeing a selfish side of him. I told him that I want a day off next week so he can't take every day off and he goes, "I don't care what you want. I'm taking it off!"
I feel for the guy, but I want him to suck it up like we all are and not screw us over.
Advice??? Anything I can say to him that might help him get through this? And what if I "get tough" with him and start saying things like, "you're going to have to suck this up like the rest of us. We need you at work! Stop whimping out on us and get to work!" Is that going to make him mad or do ESTP's respect it when someone shoots straight with them?