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Thread: Fi Doms & Subs

  1. #31
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    ^ insightful post sim

    One of my best friends is ISFP. When her feelings are predominant, she paints, gardens or plain old jumps around and screams to the sky. She does ecstatic dance and yoga and all of these physically grounding activities. At work, one afternoon the person closing the lunch room was going to throw out all the knives and forks because someone left all these dirty dishes in the sink. As an environmental activist, she was ready to literally hit him - I had to stage an intervention right there! (And I saved the cutlery too, no worries there.)

    To me there is this general, inaccurate assumption that INFP dumps emo all around the world and I feel compelled to publically reject that view. Because my life personal experience is very contrary to this representation; I am very private and hold my feelings even closer to me. You may never know what I really feel because I keep any external expression tightly reigned in; like a delicate flower or crystal vase, emotions don't react well to rough handling. So I tend to their care myself. And trust only a very very select few to even see these precious glimpses into my soul.

    On the forum though, when someone seems accusatory on Fi, I do rush to defend it, because if I don't, it seems like no one else will. My feelings are a part of me that I have had to learn to love whether I like them or not. So I feel like no one else has the right to attack them, or anyone else's feelings for that matter.

    I can only speak for myself of course.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

  2. #32
    Freshman Member simulatedworld's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    I am very private and hold my feelings even closer to me. You may never know what I really feel because I keep any external expression tightly reigned in; like a delicate flower or crystal vase, emotions don't react well to rough handling. So I tend to their care myself. And trust only a very very select few to even see these precious glimpses into my soul.
    INFP type 9 ftw!

    It's the 4s that cause most of the trouble
    If you could be anything you want, I bet you'd be disappointed--am I right?

  3. #33
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    I don't know if this has been mentioned yet (as I'm posting while doing stuff around the house) but a lot of times the threads on Fi or Ti (or Fe or Te) are located in the NF or NT subforums, which facilitates talk about N in conjunction with those functions as opposed to recognition of those functions in Sensors as well

    I know I'd appreciate more plain discussions on the topic since Fi is one of those functions I have issues with and would like to develop a better understanding of, but Fi in an NF isn't exactly what I'm looking for!
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  4. #34
    Vaguely Precise Seymour's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by simulatedworld View Post
    EDIT: Yes, as tesla notes, there is also the interpreting negative intentions where none exist problem. I've seen SFPs do this occasionally, but not nearly to the extent INFPs do.
    My close ISFP friend tends to make different kinds of unwarranted leaps than I do. From my perspective, sometimes he'll pin his entire interpretation of an event on one detail in a way that seems odd to me. Also, sometimes it seems like his tertiary Ni will latch onto a couple of details and build a weird conspiracy-ish theory around them (this is especially true if he feels frustrated or stymied about something). His mood also seems more up or down moment to moment based on recent experiences than mine does.

    On the plus side, he's much more able to enjoy the current moment, and I like that he both can live in the present (more so than I can) and still has lots of Fi-based emotional awareness.

    I don't know how many of qualities are individual quirks vs. typical for ISFPs, though.

    As far as INFP vs ENTP conflict online.. I seems like a combo of both INFPs reading things in that aren't there, and ENTPs using emotionally charged language (either unintentionally or for comic, intensifying and/or pot-stirring effect). INFPs know they wouldn't use such language unless there was corresponding feeling behind it, so impute those feelings to the ENTP. The ENTP reacts negatively to that, which just gives the INFP more negative verbiage to analyze and project into. Zany hilarity ensues.

    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    To me there is this general, inaccurate assumption that INFP dumps emo all around the world and I feel compelled to publically reject that view. Because my life personal experience is very contrary to this representation. I am very private and hold my feelings even closer to me. You may never know what I really feel because I keep any external expression tightly reigned in; like a delicate flower or crystal vase, emotions don't react well to rough handling. So I tend to their care myself. And trust only a very very select few to even see these precious glimpses into my soul.

    On the forum though, when someone seems accusatory on Fi, I do rush to defend it, because if I don't, it seems like no one else will. My feelings are a part of me that I have had to learn to love whether I like them or not. So I feel like no one else has the right to attack them, or anyone else's feelings for that matter.

    I can only speak for myself of course.
    I relate a lot to that, including rushing in to defend Fi (or other people's feelings). I also tend to keep a lot of my emotional state to myself (not that I've always kept my cool on here).

  5. #35
    morose bourgeoisie
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    Disneyland had a cool sub.

  6. #36
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seymour View Post
    It seems like a combo of both INFPs reading things in that aren't there, and ENTPs using emotionally charged language (either unintentionally or for comic, intensifying and/or pot-stirring effect). INFPs know they wouldn't use such language unless there was corresponding feeling behind it, so impute those feelings to the ENTP. The ENTP reacts negatively to that, which just gives the INFP more negative verbiage to analyze and project into. Zany hilarity ensues.
    Haha, so true.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

  7. #37
    Freshman Member simulatedworld's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seymour View Post
    As far as INFP vs ENTP conflict online.. I seems like a combo of both INFPs reading things in that aren't there, and ENTPs using emotionally charged language (either unintentionally or for comic, intensifying and/or pot-stirring effect). INFPs know they wouldn't use such language unless there was corresponding feeling behind it, so impute those feelings to the ENTP. The ENTP reacts negatively to that, which just gives the INFP more negative verbiage to analyze and project into. Zany hilarity ensues.
    +10
    If you could be anything you want, I bet you'd be disappointed--am I right?

  8. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    To me there is this general, inaccurate assumption that INFP dumps emo all around the world and I feel compelled to publically reject that view. Because my life personal experience is very contrary to this representation; I am very private and hold my feelings even closer to me. You may never know what I really feel because I keep any external expression tightly reigned in; like a delicate flower or crystal vase, emotions don't react well to rough handling. So I tend to their care myself. And trust only a very very select few to even see these precious glimpses into my soul.
    Agree. Maybe it's an INFP 9w1 thing.

    Also-I think enfps can have a very terse Te bite in text and we shoot off at the mouth-or the keyboard-thus perhaps you guys Fe-read anger/hostility/combatitiveness into the situation sometimes? I dunno, just a suggestion.
    Yes. Te in any situation shoots off at the mouth, and that could definitely be the cause of the interpretation problem. Fe gets aggressive and raises its voice because they feel threatened and have some drive to win (in my experience, Fe leading older brother admitted to the feeling the need to win by shouting). Te on the other hand raises its voice when it thinks something is really important, and somehow being loud about it will make you understand. Like people who yell at foreigners in English as if being loud will suddenly teach them the language. Seeing as NTPs are more fit to understand Fe due to the Fe/Ti dynamic I've heard of, Ti probably interprets the ENFP tertiary Te raised voice/shooting of at the mouth the way it would Fe raised voice/shooting off at the mouth.

    That's all supposition and theory...

    It seems like a combo of both INFPs reading things in that aren't there, and ENTPs using emotionally charged language (either unintentionally or for comic, intensifying and/or pot-stirring effect). INFPs know they wouldn't use such language unless there was corresponding feeling behind it, so impute those feelings to the ENTP. The ENTP reacts negatively to that, which just gives the INFP more negative verbiage to analyze and project into. Zany hilarity ensues.
    Fact.

  9. #39
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    It's interesting, because I don't see any other types having a similar issue like this. NTJs and NFJs get along great (and usually prefer each other for romance). SFPs and STPs are fine, STJs and SFJs are fine, etc. But why would NTP and NFP turn out this way so commonly? Those other types *should* have similar issues, similar perception but judging it different. Yet the NPs are the only ones who conflict from it.

    It really must be Ne. As you said, Fi with Ne assumes emotional implications. And that's because Ne is all about thinking out of context (while Se is thinking about the current context). And Fi would react to the NFPs perception of the implication, which when Ne is given room to wander, it will. And that's where the problem lies. With someone's blunt style, they will think that the person is trying to be hurtful. You know, all that jazz.



    Yup!

    What people don't get is that TPs and FPs can get together just fine, but ENTP + NFP doesn't usually work out as well as the others. So when ENTPs experience this, their immature Si and their Ne makes them assume that all FPs are going to be bad partners (just how I see it work out on here anyway). It's not Fi that causes problems, it's Ne. And it's really obviously that too. When NFPs and ENTPs talk about what they don't like about each other, they label it "Ti" or "Fi" and then start talking about NeTi or Fi + Ne. You'd think that these hardcore rationalists would be able to notice that obvious fact.
    ha! oh wow...for real... shit! it all makes perfect sense! damn...that sucks tho!
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  10. #40
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chaolioe View Post
    Agree. Maybe it's an INFP 9w1 thing.
    Well, I can only speak to what I know.

    I think it's better to look at individual situations and people and cease the generalizations. Makes for a better experience.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

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