FemMecha
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- Joined
- Apr 23, 2007
- Messages
- 14,068
- MBTI Type
- INFJ
- Enneagram
- 496
- Instinctual Variant
- sp/sx
Trying out this blog feature which is more recent than my blogs of yore which I am not able to find anyway.
I guess what's on my mind today is a lot of wishful thinking. My employment recently had their big student recitals which was a happy and darling time except that it really hurt my heart to pick up on a lot of criticisms. A few teachers were really criticizing each other and mortified when their students used music or made a mistake. I believe in high standards and working hard, but after that letting go and being happy and supportive. Even one of my parents was visibly upset discussing the events of the recital being afraid one child played too slow and the other played wrong notes. I reassured her that I was proud of their performance. In classical music there is a lot of judgmental attitudes that border on the neurotic. When immersed in those environments I pick up on the signals empathetically and I try to expend energy pushing back against it by trying to make people feel more secure and respected. I've been a bit sad to see once again just how early on that thinking gets started.
For the most part I find competitiveness, judgmentalism, and fighting to be destructive even to the people who are caught up in it. I wish there was a way for people to accept themselves and each other and realize that it is okay to risk being nice to someone mean, missing out on a criticism, or even being willing to be "wrong". The older I get the more it makes sense to err on the side of being too nice and too laid back.
I guess what's on my mind today is a lot of wishful thinking. My employment recently had their big student recitals which was a happy and darling time except that it really hurt my heart to pick up on a lot of criticisms. A few teachers were really criticizing each other and mortified when their students used music or made a mistake. I believe in high standards and working hard, but after that letting go and being happy and supportive. Even one of my parents was visibly upset discussing the events of the recital being afraid one child played too slow and the other played wrong notes. I reassured her that I was proud of their performance. In classical music there is a lot of judgmental attitudes that border on the neurotic. When immersed in those environments I pick up on the signals empathetically and I try to expend energy pushing back against it by trying to make people feel more secure and respected. I've been a bit sad to see once again just how early on that thinking gets started.
For the most part I find competitiveness, judgmentalism, and fighting to be destructive even to the people who are caught up in it. I wish there was a way for people to accept themselves and each other and realize that it is okay to risk being nice to someone mean, missing out on a criticism, or even being willing to be "wrong". The older I get the more it makes sense to err on the side of being too nice and too laid back.
