I can talk about abstract values, theories and such-but my personal values? I'd have to be very careful and logically pick them out. I could debate my old grad school buddy about most anything-say how to treat the mentally ill abortion, or a if we should feed homeless people and so on. But if it was an argument about something specific I did or said it might be really messy to tease apart. Although I am still unclear on values vs emo, so I may be useless here.
Our personal values are very simple. It's a series of questions. They are as follows:
Is this right?
Does this make sense?
Will I be able to handle this when I wake up tomorrow? (the one other types characterize as "will I be able to live with myself tomorrow?")
Does this harm me?
Does this harm anyone else?
If I were in their shoes, would I want them to do this to me?
That's it. Those are our personal values. They're impersonal as all hell, and that's why I'm fairly confident that I'm not making a huge generalization here - because there's no need for them to shift from person to person. They apply to practically every situation imaginable, and can inform fairly solid decision-making.
Of course, what may be interpreted as emotional pain is often one of these questions going haywire (such as when you're wrong when you think otherwise, when a situation has all of a sudden become nonsensical, when a task balloons to unforseen proportions, when inadvertent harm comes from your actions, and when you succumb to baser instincts, like the reproductive instinct, the one that gets us in trouble most often).
That's why it's very easy for us to discuss these things without becoming too emotional - if any emotion comes, it's an activation of the Fe feeling of connection with the other person for having shared this information.