Riddle for advanced typers

[poppy58]

Hi everyyone! Thanks for coming in!
My mother tounge is not english so my descriptions might be too general or not precise enough. Please ask for details and clarification!

Soooo, I'd like to type my sister so I understand how she works. I can't feel that she connects to me at all emotionally. She doesn't reach out to me (or probably we just "speak a different language"). I'd like to become more sensitive to her "language". Because I keep attacking her with emotions and she doesn't seem to be reacting.

I don't know much about how she works cognitivly (she doesn't talk to me much), so I'll try to describe her behaviour as objectively as I can.

She's a perfectionist.
She works as a PR person. But according to my mom she'd like to do something more creative.

She's very good at winning arguments and poking holes into my logic. She can "manipulate" people into seeing things her way, convince them to do what she wants.
I get the feeling that she's observant of/understands people's behaviour. Like, she's attentive when she chooses birthday gifts, she personalizes them.

She has a good sense of style. She likes cloths, she has a lot of them....half of them on her bed or floor......

She used to study photography and still take good photos. She always captures the detailes. She knows how to make a good composision.
She likes literature. Probably wrote poems/stories in her teens.

When she's overwhelmed, she breaks down emotionally. She goes into child mood, she wants cuddles and attention but wants to be left alone in the same time. And she doesn't accept any advice. When I saw her this way, it was because she got some job to do and she didn't have enough information on it or it involved other factors, that she couldn't calculate or didn't have time to do a perfect job. Maybe she didn't feel in control...

When she had a paper to do in university she always started last minute and worked on it till morning.

She sometimes "imagines" how it would feel/taste like before she decides if she wants to eat more or when trying out new food. I don't understand what's happaning when she does this. And according to her, food can have either "deep" or "high" flavors.

I thought she wasn't sporty, but now that she has a sporty boyfriend, she bikes, runs, hikes...
She can sulk and hold a grudge for a long time.

 

[bibliobibuli]

First of all, lmao, you scream so much Fe it hurts. I am pretty certain you are a Fe dom. Just an observation. Stereotypically, your sister sounds xSTP, but I don't think typing on behaviour leads to reliable results, which is why I usually avoid doing so. You seem ESFJ and I can't find your typing, so I am going with that. I think your main clash is her higher stack Ti and your dominant Fe. She might dispict you as illogical and find that frustrating. It could be possible this is keeping her from reaching out to you. Perhaps she is a bit underdeveloped and doesn't have a good grasp of Fe, which makes it very likely you tire her. As I said before, it's pretty hard to point out the problem based on superficial descriptions and not knowing yours. Could you explain what you observe using the functions? And perhaps enneagram and your type? That would make it a bit easier to assume.

 

[poppy58]

First of all, lmao, you scream so much Fe it hurts. I am pretty certain you are a Fe dom. Just an observation. Stereotypically, your sister sounds xSTP, but I don't think typing on behaviour leads to reliable results, which is why I usually avoid doing so. You seem ESFJ and I can't find your typing, so I am going with that. I think your main clash is her higher stack Ti and your dominant Fe. She might dispict you as illogical and find that frustrating. It could be possible this is keeping her from reaching out to you. Perhaps she is a bit underdeveloped and doesn't have a good grasp of Fe, which makes it very likely you tire her. As I said before, it's pretty hard to point out the problem based on superficial descriptions and not knowing yours. Could you explain what you observe using the functions? And perhaps enneagram and your type? That would make it a bit easier to assume.

Well I'm an introvert for sure. I was thinking ISFP or INFJ. Based on your observations maybe not ISFP.... I don't know the enneagram system.
When we are together I like to annoy her, and try to get a rise out of her. Just to get a connection with her.

It's hard to observe anithing for me with her. Because I'm tuned in to observe feelings and body language. She just seems slippery, I can't find a hold on her.
I was thinking her outbursts could be low Fe...
She spent a week in hospital when she was a baby, and after that my parents spoiled her.... I think that's when she learnt to use people.... and not to trust them.
The only time I remember she asked for advise was when she couldn't decide which picture to post on instagram. I was so proud of myself. And with english translations. So you're right about her respecting knowledge.

Do you have any suggestions what to look for with intuition and sensing?
I think she's more like a finish one thing first and when that's perfect she moves on to an other. Is that Ni?
Is holding a grudge Si or low Fe? She only brings up past events when she remembers, that my dad lost her toy or when she touched a snail....
She used to be clueless about her surroundings, like orienting harself in town. Where north was, where we were on the map, what country were we travelling to. She didn't care. She's better now. On the other hand when it comes to taking pictures she can be observant, she notices interesting details, colors, shapes, textures.

 

[bibliobibuli]

Well I'm an introvert for sure. I was thinking ISFP or INFJ. Based on your observations maybe not ISFP.... I don't know the enneagram system.
When we are together I like to annoy her, and try to get a rise out of her. Just to get a connection with her.

It's hard to observe anithing for me with her. Because I'm tuned in to observe feelings and body language. She just seems slippery, I can't find a hold on her.
I was thinking her outbursts could be low Fe...
She spent a week in hospital when she was a baby, and after that my parents spoiled her.... I think that's when she learnt to use people.... and not to trust them.
The only time I remember she asked for advise was when she couldn't decide which picture to post on instagram. I was so proud of myself. And with english translations. So you're right about her respecting knowledge.

Do you have any suggestions what to look for with intuition and sensing?
I think she's more like a finish one thing first and when that's perfect she moves on to an other. Is that Ni?
Is holding a grudge Si or low Fe? She only brings up past events when she remembers, that my dad lost her toy or when she touched a snail....
She used to be clueless about her surroundings, like orienting harself in town. Where north was, where we were on the map, what country were we travelling to. She didn't care. She's better now. On the other hand when it comes to taking pictures she can be observant, she notices interesting details, colors, shapes, textures.

She actually sounds like she uses higher stack Ne, rather than Se. I can pick out the Si and some Ne and she seems to use higher Ti/Pe. I am not certain, because I am just going with what you are telling me. Regarding your typing, you really seem Fe dom XDDDD I could see INFJ, but I would go with ENFJ because I see more Fe and Se, rather than dominant Ni, which is usually more apparent. IF she is xNTP and you are xNFJ, you can connect with her using Ne if the case of INFJ (in Socionics they can use Ne very well, they just don't value it) or try to understand how she processes and judges information. One tip I can give you for certain is to not confront her or try to talk about how you feel to her, it would probably shut her down even more, avoid you or plainly take that information in and use it against you if she is unhealthy and you don't get along well. Maybe someone else can also provide their insights? I am just one person. You can percieve this in many directions, so I am curious about what others might have to say on the matter.

P.S. I don't know you. You could be ISFP. Solely based on this I would say higher Fe, but I am not in your brain. I can't tell how you process things. Take my typing with a pinch of salt.

 

[poppy58]

She actually sounds like she uses higher stack Ne, rather than Se. I can pick out the Si and some Ne and she seems to use higher Ti/Pe. I am not certain, because I am just going with what you are telling me. Regarding your typing, you really seem Fe dom XDDDD I could see INFJ, but I would go with ENFJ because I see more Fe and Se, rather than dominant Ni, which is usually more apparent. IF she is xNTP and you are xNFJ, you can connect with her using Ne if the case of INFJ (in Socionics they can use Ne very well, they just don't value it) or try to understand how she processes and judges information. One tip I can give you for certain is to not confront her or try to talk about how you feel to her, it would probably shut her down even more, avoid you or plainly take that information in and use it against you if she is unhealthy and you don't get along well. Maybe someone else can also provide their insights? I am just one person. You can percieve this in many directions, so I am curious about what others might have to say on the matter.

P.S. I don't know you. You could be ISFP. Solely based on this I would say higher Fe, but I am not in your brain. I can't tell how you process things. Take my typing with a pinch of salt.

Thanks so much! I'll concentrate on non emotional information and try to listen to her more. It's hard to observe something other than emotions for me.
Can it be that we don't share any functions? and that's why I don't recognize any of her functions?

I've been trying to type myself for months and I'm still not sure about Fe-Fi....I was brought up to be the bigger person, to be helpful. And I didn't have much of an identity untill I moved out. (My mom was like two steps ahead of us figuring out what we wanted/needed.) My sister always came first in my family though. So that might have streightend my Fe or disabled my Fi.....does this make sense?

 

[Frosty]

1w2? Mbti... Unsure. Esfj maybe.

Only read the first post.
[MENTION=23915]Hawthorne[/MENTION]? I miss when we used to do this. Any ideas?

 

[poppy58]

1w2? Mbti... Unsure. Esfj maybe.

Only read the first post.

[MENTION=23915]Hawthorne[/MENTION]? I miss when we used to do this. Any ideas?

Thanks for sharing your opinion. What made you think ESFJ
I think if she is a Fe dom, she must be really unhealthy, because she's not warm and cuddlie at all. She has more of a non-trusting/awkward/distanced/polite feel to her when it comes to interacting with new people.
Somehowe I see my whole family as introverts.

 

[Frosty]

Thanks for sharing your opinion. What made you think ESFJ
I think if she is a Fe dom, she must be really unhealthy, because she's not warm and cuddlie at all. She has more of a non-trusting/awkward/distanced/polite feel to her when it comes to interacting with new people.
Somehowe I see my whole family as introverts.

Yeah, I actually was sort of debating between that and ISFJ. Because this-

She sometimes "imagines" how it would feel/taste like before she decides if she wants to eat more or when trying out new food. I don't understand what's happaning when she does this. And according to her, food can have either "deep" or "high" flavors.

Sort of a very undefined- practically based- probably even slightly foreign to the individual- Ne.

to me- sounds sort of inferior Ne ish. But this


She works as a PR person. But according to my mom she'd like to do something more creative.

Sounds tert Ne ish... Child like Ne.

Fe doms arent always... Warm and cuddly. They just see the world through a Fe gaze. Also, a Je gaze. Meaning that- everything external is met with a 'should'- and with Fe, those shoulds can be objective. Ill see if I can find something online that explains this better--- ok? I would try but it would be hazy.

 

[poppy58]

Yeah, I actually was sort of debating between that and ISFJ. Because this-

She sometimes "imagines" how it would feel/taste like before she decides if she wants to eat more or when trying out new food. I don't understand what's happaning when she does this. And according to her, food can have either "deep" or "high" flavors.

Sort of a very undefined- practically based- probably even slightly foreign to the individual- Ne.

to me- sounds sort of inferior Ne ish. But this


She works as a PR person. But according to my mom she'd like to do something more creative.

Sounds tert Ne ish... Child like Ne.

Fe doms arent always... Warm and cuddly. They just see the world through a Fe gaze. Also, a Je gaze. Meaning that- everything external is met with a 'should'- and with Fe, those shoulds can be objective. Ill see if I can find something online that explains this better--- ok? I would try but it would be hazy.

Thanks!
I think she's good at understanding how people work and what makes them tick. For example she notices when my mom needs help and she is really good at affecting my conscience so I go help her. Like saying: "ohh poor mom is so tired, she would be so happy if someone would help her making dinner". She knows what to say to get her way. It can be manipulative....Is this Fe?

 

[poppy58]

Any more ideas? She really seems like a thinker to me.....

 

[yoliyoli]

Yo, I'm going with ISFJ or INFJ for her, probably more ISFJ. If she only brings up past events as she remembers them, that's totally an Si-dom thing to do. I do it, and I'm an ISTJ. It's like you have so much information in your head that you can't store it all and it slowly becomes sensory overload. That's why Ne takes over and reminds you of it, like hey, remember this? It's really similar to this time when... But I could totally see the INFJ too, with the manipulativeness and all. Not that INFJs are manipulative but they have a particular style to them. ISFJs are more likely to cause drama, if that helps. It's that Fe. Moralizing. And ISFJs aren't always clean, or dirty necessarily. Like her room, I'm saying. Si can make you a bit of a mess in that you know where everything goes, you just can't find a place to put it. Mentally.

It might help to analyze her poetry. What did she write about? Did it use the senses? Or was it more about abstract concepts? (I know as an Si-dom it's mostly about memories mixed with feelings and experiences, which is senses. Abstract concepts is more about love and what is love and why are we here. They're two distinct kinds of poetry, both equally great.)

You kind of seem like an Fi person to me, because Te has a tendency to 'test' things. Does it work? How? And that's exactly how you play with your sister. Fe would be more like, "yo, let's go, pay attention me because you like it and I like it and everyone likes it and - aha! Betcha didn't see that hit coming, did you? Oh wait, are you crying?" Ti knows the theory but wants to test it out, Te doesn't know the theory and has to figure it out. But that's just my two cents.

 

[poppy58]

Yo, I'm going with ISFJ or INFJ for her, probably more ISFJ. If she only brings up past events as she remembers them, that's totally an Si-dom thing to do. I do it, and I'm an ISTJ. It's like you have so much information in your head that you can't store it all and it slowly becomes sensory overload. That's why Ne takes over and reminds you of it, like hey, remember this? It's really similar to this time when... But I could totally see the INFJ too, with the manipulativeness and all. Not that INFJs are manipulative but they have a particular style to them. ISFJs are more likely to cause drama, if that helps. It's that Fe. Moralizing. And ISFJs aren't always clean, or dirty necessarily. Like her room, I'm saying. Si can make you a bit of a mess in that you know where everything goes, you just can't find a place to put it. Mentally.

It might help to analyze her poetry. What did she write about? Did it use the senses? Or was it more about abstract concepts? (I know as an Si-dom it's mostly about memories mixed with feelings and experiences, which is senses. Abstract concepts is more about love and what is love and why are we here. They're two distinct kinds of poetry, both equally great.)

You kind of seem like an Fi person to me, because Te has a tendency to 'test' things. Does it work? How? And that's exactly how you play with your sister. Fe would be more like, "yo, let's go, pay attention me because you like it and I like it and everyone likes it and - aha! Betcha didn't see that hit coming, did you? Oh wait, are you crying?" Ti knows the theory but wants to test it out, Te doesn't know the theory and has to figure it out. But that's just my two cents.

Thanks for your answer!
Yeah, I kindda like to poke her and see how she reacts...
I think no one has seen her poetry. She just hinted that she wrote some.
I saw her last weekend. And she'd just broken up with her boyfriend. She was even more focused inwards than she usually is. When I talked to her, she just shut down, got annoyed with everything, she was irritable. I've only seen her being emotional when she "looses it", when she is stressed out. that's why I think she's a lower feeler. I was debating dom Si, Ni or Ti for her.

 

[entropie]

I'ld go with ENFJ, its difficult cause she is described thru a sensor lense, very on the surface and factual not much about her character or what moves her on the inside. Since between sister 1 and sister 2 miscommunication appears, I'ld type her N.

 

[poppy58]

I'ld go with ENFJ, its difficult cause she is described thru a sensor lense, very on the surface and factual not much about her character or what moves her on the inside. Since between sister 1 and sister 2 miscommunication appears, I'ld type her N.

Thank you!
That's exactly my problem, I only see the surface and I wanna understand the inside....