[NT] Problems with "drawing Attention"?

[GargoylesLegacy]

Okay so I posted this here, because I THINK it might has to do with the NTs. But let's find out.

So, somehow I started to feel very weird when posting Stuff lately.
Normally, a Forum is here to exchange Opinions, compare, discuss and Stuff like that, right? But lately I have been *feeling* (evil Word) like I would draw Attention on me when doing. I know it is stupid, because that's what a Forum is here: post your Opinion. Still.
I don't have that on any other Board, just here. Also I started to feel oddly uncomfortable to post in Threads like the Photoshop Member Thread or the MBTI Avatar Analyze one. Because - even if only for a short Time - I draw Attention on me. It's freaking weird. Never had that before.
So I wonder if Anyone of you Guys *feels* the same sometimes?
(Or is there really Someone who is bothered by my Posts? Tell the Truth! Cuz I can sense such Stuff. )

 

[Darjur]

The means by which attention is drawn bases whether it's bad or not.

The way you do it, I feel nothing. If you would have come here going "I hab cancer, blarb." Then I'd personally want to finish you off.

 

[blanclait]

"you fear drawing attention, because that will lead to..."
find that out

personally, i dont have a problem with drawing attention to myself. The only worry i have is have similar thread been posted recently? or is my question stupid and no need for a thread?

 

[Kalyrn]

I usally don't mind drawing attention as long as I know what I am talking about or can bullshit my way around a topic. Or if I need to know the answer to something.

 

[GargoylesLegacy]

The way you do it, I feel nothing. If you would have come here going "I hab cancer, blarb." Then I'd personally want to finish you off.

Gee, yeah that is a very f***d-up Way of drawing Attention. That is all "emo" and lowest Level. I hate People who do that actually so NO FREAKING WAY I would do that. Brrr.

"you fear drawing attention, because that will lead to..." find that out

Hm, yeah I tried to ask myself that, but there is no *logic* Answer really. At least not yet. I will stay on Track tho.

The only worry i have is have similar thread been posted recently? or is my question stupid and no need for a thread?

Oh yeah, I know that Feeling. I ALWAYS ask myself that. And I also wonder if People will think of it as stupid (yeah I know, odd for an INTJ). Well but for that I know the Reasons. For the other Thing not (yet).

I usally don't mind drawing attention as long as I know what I am talking about or can bullshit my way around a topic.

Yeah true. It's kind of an odd Feeling when you just post without knowing Anything about the Topic. It's like...embarassing or something like that.

 

[digesthisickness]

it's only natural as an N to project into the future and attempt to view things (like how you could be seen by others) from other perspectives, and then begin to try analyzing it.

seems perfectly normal to me. my only advice is to try to stay focused on what is really going on, what you're really doing, so that you don't confuse it for being a truth (in this case, that others are actually feeling/thinking a certain way about you) that may not be real at all.

 

[kuranes]

The term "attention whore" that gets thrown around on these forums, and is maybe what the OP is getting at. I think that there is a difference between quality posts and posts that lack quality ( although there are a multitude of opinions on what Quality is ) , so that it is not the sheer number of posts that a person makes, but how good they are that matters to me. It's not likely that one could make 30 posts per day that were all quality posts, but technically it is possible. So a person that wasn't making very many posts might still get noticed unfavorably, if the few they made were stupid ones.

People come to boards like this for different reasons, too, and also may expect to encounter different age groups. Some are here just for things like "academic" discussions, career or market tips, and other "serious" talk. Others are here partly to socialize and meet people who may be closer to their wavelength than those not of their type.

The word "quality" can even apply to silly posts, IMHO, though. There are some kinds of playfulness that I like more than others, which often involves the intelligence behind them.

There are some people who do little but point out errors they see in others' posts. That becomes their "quality contribution".

People who come here only for what they define as "serious" may not like posts or threads that are obviously socially oriented. Even if one stays "on topic" they may feel that a personal experience that relates to the OP is "anecdotal" versus exemplifying a legitimate "trend" across the country or for some other notable reason. Or they may feel that jokes in a thread derail the thread.

As far as derailing goes, this is a mixed bag, as sometimes threads are improved by derailment, and sometimes they are diluted. IMHO it is the responsibility of people interested in topic X to bring it back to life, if a derailment occurs. They can also PM people that they think are derailing a topic, if those people aren't picking up on their efforts to bring it back OT. That said, I understand that sometimes it is too late to try and salvage a thread due to the short attention spans of many members. It can be hard to get them to look at a thread even once, let along come back for a second try. Also, people sometimes don't realize that their "one little joke" will inspire other members to make "just one joke", so that the jarring is not so trivial.

Sometimes a thread may be scrolling down into limbo, and be revived by a "joke post" and thus come to the attention of someone who wishes to continue on topic, which might not have otherwise occurred. This is something else that is often forgotten when considering these matters. People rarely use the search function to bring up a thread on a subject they want to talk about. They just create a new thread, unless they remember an old one. Sometimes "out of sight" is also "out of mind".

 

[GargoylesLegacy]

it's only natural as an N to project into the future and attempt to view things (like how you could be seen by others) from other perspectives, and then begin to try analyzing it.

(Wha, I am normal? <-- sorry, had to do that)
In any Way, thanks for your Advice. I try to stay focused, even tho sometimes it is kinda hard. Guess I need to improve my Skills a Bit there. =)

The term "attention whore" that gets thrown around on these forums, and is maybe what the OP is getting at.

OMG, there is even a Word for that? Okay, learned something New then. And that Word even describes it very well, I'd say.

I think that there is a difference between quality posts and posts that lack quality ( although there are a multitude of opinions on what Quality is ), so that it is not the sheer number of posts that a person makes, but how good they are that matters to me.

Oh yeah I see what you mean. Basically you are saying that even if Some1 has (let me exaggerate) 200 Posts a Day it doesn't mean he / she is an "Attention Whore", if they write *good* Posts and not only "Look at meeeeeh!". Yeah that's actually a good Input!
Personally I dun do those "Look at meh, I am soooo awesome" Posts. I mean I do joke sometimes but yeah uh, who doesn't (and if I ever seem to act like an "Attention Whore", please shot me? Err I mean...please tell me. *cough*)

 

[kuranes]

Personally I dun do those "Look at meh, I am soooo awesome"

Yeah, but there are shades of grey as to what constitutes a "look at me !" post, or ( looked at from another viewpoint ) a "bad" "look at me" post.

For example, right now there is a thread on "Nymphomaniacs" on the site. If someone were to post, "There are groups like Alcoholics Anonymous that are designed for people addicted to sex" and the next post was "LOLZ, sign me up for th Sex Addicks club then !" this would be seen as an obvious ( and therefore dumb ) joke, and so lacking in quality as to be little more than a "look at me" post, even though the words themselves were not actually used.

Less obvious - Person A creates a thread titled "Things I dislike" and Person B posts "Threads like this" in it, as an example of what they don't like. The person who posted "Threads like this" was bringing up the the kind of humor that points out recursiveness, and hoping it would be seen as clever. Maybe it would be clever on some boards, but...not so much here IMHO.

Even less obvious - The person who invariably posts "Define X" any time a thread about "X" comes along, and then asks the same of the words used to define "X", continually splitting hairs, and thus preventing the thread from ever getting off the ground. I'm not saying that one should never try to get some understanding of how an opposing viewpoint sees things ( I do it myself ) but it's like a religion for some people. Their main focus seems to be saying "since everything is relative, why should we ever discuss any subject seriously ?" It's their way of seeking attention.

 

[Willfrey]

Is it stressful worrying about what people think (or feel?) about your posting habits online? I find comfort in the anonymity of forums, I can say things and ask questions here that I probably wouldn't otherwise in real life. Sure you can over time develop a persona but I'm a firm believer the person you are online is much different then who you are in reality.

I suppose what I'm getting at is so long as you adhere to the forum rules, who cares what people think of you? I am pretty easy going and can keep it to myself if I find one person irritating or annoying, it is almost effortless to scroll past offending posters rather than be a tough guy and call them out on such indiscretions.

 

[GargoylesLegacy]

Yes, I can see your Point, kuranes.
It's always a thin Path between the two Extremes, isn't it?

In any Way...what I mean is that I do not try to make those bad "look at meeeeh" Posts. I mean Every1 has bad Days sometimes but uh, yeah you get the Point.
Oh and I must say, since I started this Thread that disturbing Feeling went back quite a Bit. That's great. =)