INTPs are supposedly the jack of all trades, master of none, right? I find this true about myself except for one thing... I'm the master of lies. I lie all the time, to myself and others; I weave fabricated stories with such conviction until they become absolute truth, and even I can't always remember where fact ends and fiction begins. I lie all the time about the most inconsequential things, and I lie pretty often to weasel my way out of trouble. I think this might be a reason I've managed to coast so easily through academia at 2nd level - teachers are compelled to trust and believe me, and they usually like me because I'm good at their subject when I want to be. Other people might get scolded for failing to hand in homework time and again, but I spin my lies and the teacher instead gently chides me and advises me to be more focused. Unfortunately, 3rd level is so different, so impersonal and tutors/lecturers so unapproachable that the only way they know me is through my work, not my lies. Essential for me to cop myself on - yes. Annoying as fuck - certainly.
I'm annoyed that I am so amazingly adept at this, but have never yet managed to put such a powerful skill to a positive use. I weave myself a story about being a big-ass failure, and make excuses for being a big-ass failure that I'm completely convinced I'm a big-ass failure. Why haven't I given myself a good story, spun tales of my being amazing and successful etc and allowed myself to whole-heartedly believe that I hold incredible powers of change?
Grrr, stupid brain. Be more co-operative >_<