Need to help type someone.

[Brylif]

My husband has typed as ISTJ and the description matches him fairly well, but I think he may be an ISFJ. There are a few reasons why I've come to that conclusion, but I won't deny that he can seem very Te-like in some situations. Here are the reasons I question his type:

First off, he's in management and enjoys it for the most part. While he does expect others to follow rules and do everything the "right" way, I've noticed that he seems very friendly to others (more so than the typical ISTJ). When I'm around him, there are even more time where he is much more socially engaging than me, whereas I won't force myself to be nicer than I want to be (which often leads me to wonder if I'm actually an INFP, but that's a separate story). There are a few people that we both don't really like and we both stay civil around them, but he actually engages with them and makes small talk while I'm just standing next to him awkwardly wondering "are you done?"

Before anyone asks, no he's not extroverted. He is 100% positive on that.

Another reason is because before he got his management position, he was often taken advantage of at work. Everyone would dump the jobs that no one else would do on him and he didn't argue because he was afraid of causing conflict that could lead to him having an even harder time at work or possibly even losing his job. Now that he is a manager, one of his biggest issues is actually being confident in his decision making (which he has repeatedly been told by his superiors). It all seems to make ISTJ seem very unlikely for him.

There are situations where he insists that a logical decision is always best and even states that he values being respected over being liked. There was one instance when his crew wasn't cooperating that he actually lost his temper in private and started punching something (which could very well argue the Fe-aux, but it seemed more like a tertiary Fi creeping up under stress, if that would actually happen). Yet while he's extremely goal oriented, his primary focus is to provide and take care of me and my daughter, which again points to Fe-aux. He's also told me in the past that he enjoys helping people.

What do you guys think? Does he sound like an ISFJ or just a really friendly ISTJ?

 

[Brylif]

Anyone?

 

[Chrysanthe]

Sounds ISTJ nuff to me.

 

[Brylif]

I figured he was, I just thought I'd look more into the ISFJ thing since he has some of those qualities too. Thanks for the reply.

 

[Xann]

Anyone?

Definitely within the realm of ISTJ from the sounds of it. There is such a thing as a socially charming and caring ISTJ, after all, there are many of them on this forum even. I believe if he actually were an Fe user there would be more concrete examples of its use rather than the generalized attitudes you've provided. Have you tried to enneatype him yet? Possibly a 6 or a 9, perhaps? 2 may indicate ISFJ hidden under a more masculine persona.

 

[Brylif]

I didn't mean to imply that I thought ISTJ's weren't friendly, so I'm sorry if it seemed that way. I only questioned it because the way he seems to be socially harmonious at times made me wonder if he might be a Fe user. And no, I haven't tried that yet, so I may mention it to him soon. Thanks!