[ISTJ] ISTJ father

[Lia_kat]

Hi, guys. Question for you -- what are some things I can do to connect with my ISTJ father? I love him dearly, he's always been there for our family and a great provider but we've never been emotionally close because he's very closed off and doesn't talk much. I find him boring at times too because he's so stuck in his ways and doesn't like to expand his views or seek any adventure in his life. He can very rigid and stubborn. I tend to be very opinionated and defend my views (Fi) and honestly sometimes it feels like I'm talking to a brick wall. I recently expressed how I feel about our relationship and he's been trying hard to be a part of my life more, which I appreciate. I'm just wondering how can I create a deeper bond with him and get him to open up? He has come to me to vent with things that have happened since his divorce but other than that, nothing else. Just looking for some insight. Thanks.

 

[Tellenbach]

I suggest a regular/routine lunch or dinner visit if you want to create a deeper bond, but I think you're going to be disappointed if you expect him to open up more or be less boring or be open to your views. Basically, spend more time with him and just enjoy who he is without trying to change him. Oh...and try to be happy when you're with him and if you can't be happy, then don't bother.