[MBTI General] ISFPs: What do you think of xSTJs?

[kätzchen0812]

I'm an ISFP and the people who irritate me the very most are ESTJs and ISTJs.

What do the rest of you think of xSTJs?

 

[Quinlan]

There are plenty of good ones but if there was an unhealthy type that I like the least they would be right up there. I think it's natural really.

 

[kätzchen0812]

I just discussed it with an INFJ friend. He thinks it's because they are so rigid and directly contradict our FP functions; he said they also can't think for themselves most of the time. They tend to be exceedingly judgmental, arrogant, and self-absorbed as well, in my opinion. ESTJs can be extremely manipulative as well, but they are much more capable of being empathetic than ISTJs.

 

[Unique]

I just discussed it with an INFJ friend. He thinks it's because they are so rigid and directly contradict our FP functions; he said they also can't think for themselves most of the time. They tend to be exceedingly judgmental, arrogant, and self-absorbed as well, in my opinion. ESTJs can be extremely manipulative as well, but they are much more capable of being empathetic than ISTJs.

Judgmental - Depends on your meaning of the word here, but if its how I think you are using it than no
Arrogant - Not a characteristic that can be placed on an MBTI type
Self-absorbed - Not a characteristic that can be placed on an MBTI type
Extremely manipulative - Hmm I'm starting to see a pattern of blatant type bashing here

What did you expect? ISFPs to swarm into this thread to have a go at SJs? It's a well known fact that the artisan way and the guardian way are very very different but you need to learn how to embrace peoples differences and be constructive

Oh and just so you know around 20%+ of the population are xSTJs so in effect you are saying that ALL of these people are the above

Do I get along with xSTJs personally? Not generally no, but that doesn't mean they are arrogant or manipulative, some of them may be... and that something thats particularly hard to deal with if you are an SP but there are some bad ISFPs out there as well, you may of even met a bad ISFP but it was much easier for you to relate so the flaws were not as obvious

 

[kätzchen0812]

Not exactly, I was merely weighing in on other ISFP's opinions. I noticed a trend with the 3 ISTJs (a former best friend, ex boyfriend, and my father) and 3 ESTJs (a friend, my grandmother, and a very close former teacher) I am close to or have been close to in the past. I did not open this thread to "bash" any types, just discussing how other ISFPs perceive them- I know their good sides as well as their bad ones.

 

[Clonester]

My close ESTJ friend is dating an ISFP. They can literally talk for HOURS about different things that seem totally trivial to me but hey, communication is communication. I would think it is a really good combo, especially since the ESTJ is the guy. Not sure how well it would work the other way around. The two of them just click.

 

[NewEra]

Oh and just so you know around 20%+ of the population are xSTJs so in effect you are saying that ALL of these people are the above

Bingo. Haha, you better learn to deal with us!!! Hahaha.

 

[Quinlan]

I think STJs will naturally want to impose on an SFPs freedom, and will have (what we perceive as) strict expectations of them and will naturally want to define/label them. There is nothing inherently wrong with any of these things but they are likely to bother ISFPs on some level.

"The people I tend to dislike are STJs" ≠ "I dislike all STJs". There is a clear difference.

 

[totallypsycho]

can esfps respond??

ummm i havent really got a chance to know many XSTJ on a personal level(thought i can definitely smell them from a mile away). mainly because i havent really opened myself to them because im intimidated by strong personalities and i dislike having my every little action judged and/or controlled.

i will be cordial to them though because i do that with at least everyone.

 

[Eagle]

I just discussed it with an INFJ friend. He thinks it's because they are so rigid and directly contradict our FP functions; he said they also can't think for themselves most of the time. They tend to be exceedingly judgmental, arrogant, and self-absorbed as well, in my opinion. ESTJs can be extremely manipulative as well, but they are much more capable of being empathetic than ISTJs.

I think you need to meet some more people and stop stereotyping.
Things you might see as issues, arrogance for example, might just be them stating facts and stating them as facts or things that aren't to be argued with. It's not that they are arrogant or what not, it just that those are things set in stone. People are different. Not everyone is going to get along with everyone. It's just a part of life. I personally strive to get along with and please most people. Not because I feel that I necessarily have to fit in but because it's polite. We might only come across as that because we are stubborn. Everyone is bull-headed in their own way. In a way, it defines us. In a way, it defines you. Enjoy your feeling and your flexible life style, It's not necessarily bad, but a balance between both sides of the issue is best. In a way, your preference for lack of structure is a structure.

Bingo. Haha, you better learn to deal with us!!! Hahaha.

Haha.

can esfps respond??

ummm i havent really got a chance to know many XSTJ on a personal level(thought i can definitely smell them from a mile away). mainly because i havent really opened myself to them because im intimidated by strong personalities and i dislike having my every little action judged and/or controlled.

i will be cordial to them though because i do that with at least everyone.

I think you need to meet some new people too. You judge everyone's actions just like everyone else, it's not possible to not make judgments. Some people like control. I like power. But power is simply influencing people and events. I can have power over my friends, I can have power over my family, I can have power of a lot of things. It doesn't mean that I have to have that power or use that control. STJ's like structure. That much is accurate, but I think people blow it out of proportion how much we/they like structure and why. Some of us like it because it makes us comfortable. Others like it because it helps them think, etc. There are many reasons. One reason why me might like structure is because we know what's expected, what needs to be done, how to act. There are many reasons. I think you might just need to take a step back and let the people define the types rather than let the types define the people. Typology is only a theories. Theories are only there because we think they might explain how things work. It doesn't mean they work that way. And in the case of people, everyone is unique.

 

[/DG/]

I'm sorry you think of me that way. D:

 

[Jeffster]

I am usually fine with STJs unless one is my boss. I don't like them as bosses.

 

[Eagle]

I am usually fine with STJs unless one is my boss. I don't like them as bosses.

I prefer the term LEADER.
But that's cause I try to do it right.

 

[Unique]

I prefer the term LEADER.
But that's cause I try to do it right.

Probably not the best thing to say in a thread saying STJs are arrogant mate lol even if it was a joke

 

[ilovetrannies]

I have quite a few family members that are ISTJs and ESTJ and they can be be somewhat difficult to get along with. Don't get me wrong, I love them very much and they are very good to me. Only I am very, very liberal and they are very, very, very conservative, so we tend to clash sometimes. I enjoy the discussions but they are so structured into what they believe is right, I mostly just smile and nod and respect their opinion than start an argument.

 

[/DG/]

Liberal powaaa!!

 

[BlackCat]

They are either really cool or they are narrow minded and boring.

 

[Unique]

I like SJs that don't impose their ways onto others unfortunately there are a lot of SJs that do and give the rest a bad name

 

[Sidewinder]

They are decent people, but we don't have much in common, so I don't hang around with them much. However, I work with several and have a few in my family, and I definitely feel they don't deserve the bad reputation they have. They have many good old-fashioned qualities, like honesty and dependability and helpfulness. I get along the ISTJs better, as I find the extraverted ones can be too loud and dominate everything. Some ISTJs can be a bit bland/boring. My uncle just likes to play golf, and that's all he likes. But some ISTJs are very thoughtful and good at more traditional arts like wood carving or playing the fiddle.

I am usually fine with STJs unless one is my boss. I don't like them as bosses.

I've found the same thing. They are goal directed and put all else aside to get to that goal. They put in crazy hours and expect everyone else to do the same. Some may sacrifice their personal lives and even their health and relationships to meet their work goals. :steam:

 

[stellar renegade]

I have too much of a varied opinion. I've kinda hated them in the past but because of a huge stereotype and the actions of a few. I love the ones I've come to know as friends. It can be really hard being under them as managers, though. Some of them can be too strict. Although we have a manager right now who simply has to be a XSTJ, and he's really surprisingly cool, as much as he goes by company policy.

Or maybe he's actually a XNTJ, seeming to go more by principle. hmmmm, never really thought about that before.

I work with an XSTJ, though, and he's really cool. He knows how to have fun even though he commits himself to the job. He's also disgruntled about the higher-ups just like the rest of us.