[MBTI General] ISFJ Females vs. ISTJ Females

[d@v3]

Okay, I know someone answered this before, but I think we need to have a thread about it. How do you tell them apart? After all, I think a lot of ISTJ females feel they need to "pretend" to act a little "F-ish", no? (And by "F-ish" I mean more concerned with the people around them.)

Post your thoughts.

 

[FallaciaSonata]

This is all speculation on my part, but wouldn't a female be naturally inclined (or perhaps socially pressured to some degree, great or small) to act more "F-ish", because (again, I've only heard this) most other women are F?

The above is a total guess. Slightly educated, but mostly guess. I equate it to the....you know that old phrase, "Men don't cry"? That social stereotype that men are mostly "T"? Wouldn't the same, or something similar, apply here?

Perhaps we can get a couple of women with those types on here to explain. Interesting thought you've got here, d@v3.

 

[/DG/]

This is all speculation on my part, but wouldn't a female be naturally inclined (or perhaps socially pressured to some degree, great or small) to act more "F-ish", because (again, I've only heard this) most other women are F?

Not all females are F. I consider my self to be an ISTJ, and the last time I check, I am a female. There are many social pressures to be more "F-ish," but those sort of things are usually out of my comfort zone.

@ d@ve - Do you mean just in general, or are you trying to type someone?

 

[simpleamazement]

ISFJ females are more sensitive and take things personally.

ISTJ females are not as sensitive and usually takes things less personally. They tend to take on more responsibility in the workplace. They're not as concerned with feelings as ISFJs.

 

[Habba]

I know an ISTJ female and an ISFJ female. Somehow they are actually rather similar. They both appear to be quiet and peaceful sort of people. They never openly insult anyone, but behind the scenes they might say couple of bad words about certain people. I think both o them are avoiding conflicts quite a lot.

However, they do differ. The ISFJ talks a lot more when she's in a smaller group, while the ISTJ is content just listening to people talk. Actually, the ISTJ once told me she enjoys watching and observing other people, rather than interact with them. The ISFJ is quite contrary, she's always interested in what's new in everyone's life.

They both have somewhat pessimistic views of the world, but the ISTJ says the world is full of morons and dumb people, and that she's the one true perfection (jokingly). The ISFJ on the other hand says that the world of is full of people that are weird or unconventional. She's confused at why they are not acting normal.

The ISFJ seems to be questioning her abilities to succees at something a lot more.

 

[hommefatal]

The ISFJ on the other hand says that the world of is full of people that are weird or unconventional. She's confused at why they are not acting normal.

While ISTJs tend to talk to weirdos because they could find an advantage there.

 

[Grungemouse]

Ah, I have a case study for this thread. I think I've mentioned that I spent high school sandwiched between an ISFJ and an ISTJ, more than once.

Habba's post rings true actually. The only thing I have to add is that the ISTJ had a stronger work ethic. Whenever we exchanged the occasional "How do you does" the main topic on her agenda was finding a job, or complaining about the current one she had. The main topic the ISFJ loved to discuss was gossip, "You'd never guess what happened to so-and-so!", things like that. Also, the ISTJ was less concerned with maintaining social relationships. She was loyal, but in a more hidden, underlying way. The ISFJ seemed to make an active effort in maintaining ties, even a year after I moved away.

If an item of reading was to personify an ISTJ in general, it would be a broadsheet newspaper: informative, detailed and more concerned with current issues.

An ISFJ would most likely be an entertainment magazine: concerned with interpersonal affairs, style & fashion, and celebrity gossip.

I'd say humour was another thing that separated them. The ISFJ was cynical and out-right sarcastic, or quoting inside jokes between herself and another. The ISTJ was more dry and subtle, and focusing more on observations. It was a bit more ruthless and cutting than the ISFJ's. Both of them loved quoting lines from their favourite SitComs and films. Referring to Habba's post, the ISTJ's humour stemmed more from the stupidity of everyone around her, whilst the ISFJ's humour stemmed from social oddities.

As would be expected, the ISTJ was more logical. During a group dispute, she would stand up for the one who was genuinely in the right, whilst the ISFJ would support the one who was upset. Both were generally passive in these matters, unless they were dragged into it.

I'm trying to remember other things about them. Specific questions in distinguishing the two would be more helpful.

 

[Shadow]

As an ISTJ, I know a lot of people are put off me because I don't conform to the "emotional female" stereotype. But I don't feel pressured to be more F; well, sometimes when I'm in an all-female group (which is rare now), but I can't seem to do it even then. I know I seem awkward when I try to be emotional, and it's embarrassing.

I think the ISFJ is more accommodating than the ISTJ, who might be a bit more cautious, a bit slower to form a connection. Observation is our watchword.

On the other hand, I think when an ISTJ female is aware of what a situation is like, she can adapt to it easier than the ISFJ. I'm kind of going on what my ISFJ boyfriend is like here, so not female, but I know I'm usually more scared before going into unknown situations with lots of people, but then when we're there I'm the one who wants to stay longer and my bf quickly tires of it, never quite relaxing into it as much as me.

I know an ISTJ female and an ISFJ female. Somehow they are actually rather similar. They both appear to be quiet and peaceful sort of people. They never openly insult anyone, but behind the scenes they might say couple of bad words about certain people. I think both o them are avoiding conflicts quite a lot.

However, they do differ. The ISFJ talks a lot more when she's in a smaller group, while the ISTJ is content just listening to people talk. Actually, the ISTJ once told me she enjoys watching and observing other people, rather than interact with them. The ISFJ is quite contrary, she's always interested in what's new in everyone's life.

Yeah, or the ISTJ might talk but not really be listening to what the other person's saying... I know I'm guilty of that one and I'm working on it.

They both have somewhat pessimistic views of the world, but the ISTJ says the world is full of morons and dumb people, and that she's the one true perfection (jokingly). The ISFJ on the other hand says that the world of is full of people that are weird or unconventional. She's confused at why they are not acting normal.

The ISFJ seems to be questioning her abilities to succees at something a lot more.

True, true. ISFJs seem less sure of themselves than the ISTJ, that's a key difference. Maybe we're more likely to dismiss people's opinions and criticisms than the ISFJ too?

Also, the ISTJ was less concerned with maintaining social relationships. She was loyal, but in a more hidden, underlying way. The ISFJ seemed to make an active effort in maintaining ties, even a year after I moved away.

Think that's true.

I'd say humour was another thing that separated them. The ISFJ was cynical and out-right sarcastic, or quoting inside jokes between herself and another. The ISTJ was more dry and subtle, and focusing more on observations. It was a bit more ruthless and cutting than the ISFJ's. Referring to Habba's post, the ISTJ's humour stemmed more from the stupidity of everyone around her, whilst the ISFJ's humour stemmed from social oddities.

As would be expected, the ISTJ was more logical. During a group dispute, she would stand up for the one who was genuinely in the right, whilst the ISFJ would support the one who was upset. Both were generally passive in these matters, unless they were dragged into it.

Agree with all that too.

 

[Totenkindly]

ISFJ females are more sensitive and take things personally.

ISTJ females are not as sensitive and usually takes things less personally. They tend to take on more responsibility in the workplace. They're not as concerned with feelings as ISFJs.

I know an ISTJ female and an ISFJ female. Somehow they are actually rather similar. They both appear to be quiet and peaceful sort of people. They never openly insult anyone, but behind the scenes they might say couple of bad words about certain people. I think both o them are avoiding conflicts quite a lot.

However, they do differ. The ISFJ talks a lot more when she's in a smaller group, while the ISTJ is content just listening to people talk. Actually, the ISTJ once told me she enjoys watching and observing other people, rather than interact with them. The ISFJ is quite contrary, she's always interested in what's new in everyone's life.

They both have somewhat pessimistic views of the world, but the ISTJ says the world is full of morons and dumb people, and that she's the one true perfection (jokingly). The ISFJ on the other hand says that the world of is full of people that are weird or unconventional. She's confused at why they are not acting normal.

The ISFJ seems to be questioning her abilities to succees at something a lot more.

Some good observations here.

I do see ISFJs really being timid about their capabilities, they are usually far better at their tasks than they allow themselves to believe and just try even harder to be perfect/faithful in their duties. ISTJ women do seem more aware of the "objective" assessment of their skillsets and are less flustered by contrary judgments, nor do they always need to make peace or ensure their role in the social environment.

The ISTJ = sees moron/dumb vs ISFJ = weird/uncoventional is something I recognized as soon as you said it. I guess it's the rational dichotomy captured by Te vs. Fe.

 

[Eiddy]

I have to say I agree with most of this, but not the part about being concerned with others. Especially not with fashion magazines or celebrity gossip. This is the first time for me to refer to MJ's death or any other famous persons death, except my younger brother.

Not being sarcastic to my own type at all, but it's more like do you know how it makes me feel, if I feel overworked or slighted. Whatever goes on around me doesn't really affect me. Also I hate listening to gossip about others because it colors the perception I see of others and we can't hide how we feel. Once a coworker was pissed with the principal, she was known to be a complainer and I didn't want to be tainted as a black sheep along with her. I told her the best thing for her to do was to go and talk to him about it, since there isn't much I can do for you. Not that I wasn't feeling bad for her, but I would rather see solutions and not more problems.

If she happens to be my best friend, well I would tell her to wait till we go back to my house or her house. Then she can talk until she gets it all out of her.

So maybe that ISFJ was like that, but not all of us react the same in similar situations. There is experience, knowledge, upbringing, and so many other things that play a major factor in our actions or reactions.

This is not against any other person's opinions, we have our rights to our own thoughts and opinions, hopefully it will help to clarify some points.

Grungemouse this hits the nail on the head at least for me. The ISFJ's humour stemmed from social oddities. As would be expected, the ISTJ was more logical. During a group dispute, she would stand up for the one who was genuinely in the right, whilst the ISFJ would support the one who was upset. Both were generally passive in these matters, unless they were dragged into it.

 

[d@v3]

Not all females are F. I consider my self to be an ISTJ, and the last time I check, I am a female. There are many social pressures to be more "F-ish," but those sort of things are usually out of my comfort zone.

@ d@ve - Do you mean just in general, or are you trying to type someone?

I'm talking about in general. Not anyone specifically. What do you mean out of your comfort zone?

 

[/DG/]

I'm talking about in general. Not anyone specifically. What do you mean out of your comfort zone?

If we're talking about cultural stereotypes, women are "supposed" to use Fe a lot. Disclosing my emotions and feelings is definitely out of my comfort zone. I dislike doing it in front of others.

 

[EJCC]

The ISTJ girl that I know (my cousin) doesn't fake Fe at all.
Between here and the one ISFJ I know irl, here are some of the differences I notice:

1. The ISTJ I know is pretty stoic usually (her two extremes are "Relatively Cheery" and "Sulking"), which the ISFJ is pretty moody (her two extremes are "ROTFL" and "Completely Emo").
2. The ISTJ's humor is pretty dark - more so than the ISFJ's.
3. The ISTJ isn't as likely to care what people think of her. I get the impression from the ISFJ that she'd do almost anything for the acceptance of her peers.
4. The ISTJ is very, very blunt. Not as much with the ISFJ, unless it's a sensitive topic.

Not sure how good an example of an ISFJ the one I know is (she's got some issues, and is very insecure), but... yeah.

 

[d@v3]

Where would you be likely to spot ISFJ's and ISTJ's out and about? Would they be likley to be hanging around eachother? Let's say... in a university setting.

 

[d@v3]

It seems I have stumped everyone!

 

[Grungemouse]

Well, oddly enough, my ISFJ and ISTJ seemed to gravitate towards one another. But that may be little to do with compatibility, but more with the higher population of the two types. Their cynical humour definitely seemed to cement the two, though.

They both frequent social networking sites. In honesty, I don't think you'd see them out and about that often at all. Maybe places that feed their Sensory needs, like music stores and cinemas (preferably with their Extraverted friend who coaxed them out of their house).

 

[runvardh]

Hmmm, from this and some annecdotal data I'd probably prefer the ISTJ over the ISFJ as I'd rather be called stupid, told why, and how to fix it than called wierd and begrudged over it behind my back. But that's only based off of stereotypes.

 

[Shadow]

The strange thing is, I love 'weird' people. My friendship group is an assortment of slightly oddball and eccentric characters. I think a lot of 'normal' people are stupid, and that's why I can't connect to a lot of people. Probably.
Not like an ISFJ. I don't think my ex-housemate (ESFJ) could handle anyone slightly out of the norm either.

 

[Eiddy]

I love eccentric characters Jeff Goldblum is one I would love to meet.

Runvardh nah if an ISFJ doesn't like you, she will not say it behind your back. We hate to have words bite us in the ass, if anything you just might not see us around. Of else you will feel a big emotional barrier go strait up, kind of like a lock down in a prison except for it would be emotional. We can overcome it, but once bitten twice shy.

Who knows with an ISFJ you might must make a very loyal friend. We don't turn our back on friendships very easily. We can take a lot of crap way before we snap. Only one person has ever reached that level with me. Anyhow that is how I see it, not sure about other ISFJ's. *looks around*

 

[runvardh]

Shadow: My best friend from high school is an ISTJ. Running around at night scaring druggies and drunks was one of our favourite activities.

Eiddy: I've found that most ISFJs in my real life either already grew up with wierdos and was used to it or are family members who know me. The rest keep their distance.