How to find direction?

[SwimmerGal97]

In short, I feel lost, want to work out where to go from here but don't know how to figure that out. I'm halfway through my a levels and as the summer holidays started today, it seems like a good time to decide on what my next step will be now I can think clearly away from school stress and pressure. Right now, I feel very pressured time wise into making a decision- yr13 starts in 7 weeks and we are all expected to apply to uni and in order to enrol into the year, besides the required as grades, you need to present your personal statement. I would love to go to uni, but for the independence and experience as opposed to any study. As I don't know what I want to study, I wouldn't be 100% committed to my studies so it seems like a waste of £40,000+. Ive considered gap years, apprenticeships, employment and I just don't know. The more I'm pushed into a decision the more I pull away and put it off, I hide behind 'masks', saying I want to do this or that because not knowing isn't an option. I've seen careers advisors and whilst lovely, there's a limit to what they can do and I find myself lying to them. Not deliberately or anything, but I think I struggle to be honest with myself sometimes, I find it hard to accept that I'm not a perfect well rounded student and that my ideal day is sat in bed binge watching TV shows and yes, tv and film watching is possibly my biggest 'hobby :/ '. I'm doing a levels in chem, bio, maths and art with further as levels in English literature and history, and even with all that breadth I still don't feel inspired or driven or fulfilled. I know its okay to not know, and its fine to just go with the flow but, to continue that metaphor, my 'river of life' has no flow. It feels stagnant. This has turned more into a stream of consciousness than anything but it helps to get things out of my head. What do I do? Do I just need to get out more and find a hobby? How do I start being truly honest with myself about what I want?

 

[Coriolis]

In short, I feel lost, want to work out where to go from here but don't know how to figure that out. I'm halfway through my a levels and as the summer holidays started today, it seems like a good time to decide on what my next step will be now I can think clearly away from school stress and pressure. Right now, I feel very pressured time wise into making a decision- yr13 starts in 7 weeks and we are all expected to apply to uni and in order to enrol into the year, besides the required as grades, you need to present your personal statement. I would love to go to uni, but for the independence and experience as opposed to any study. As I don't know what I want to study, I wouldn't be 100% committed to my studies so it seems like a waste of £40,000+. Ive considered gap years, apprenticeships, employment and I just don't know. The more I'm pushed into a decision the more I pull away and put it off, I hide behind 'masks', saying I want to do this or that because not knowing isn't an option. I've seen careers advisors and whilst lovely, there's a limit to what they can do and I find myself lying to them. Not deliberately or anything, but I think I struggle to be honest with myself sometimes, I find it hard to accept that I'm not a perfect well rounded student and that my ideal day is sat in bed binge watching TV shows and yes, tv and film watching is possibly my biggest 'hobby :/ '. I'm doing a levels in chem, bio, maths and art with further as levels in English literature and history, and even with all that breadth I still don't feel inspired or driven or fulfilled. I know its okay to not know, and its fine to just go with the flow but, to continue that metaphor, my 'river of life' has no flow. It feels stagnant. This has turned more into a stream of consciousness than anything but it helps to get things out of my head. What do I do? Do I just need to get out more and find a hobby? How do I start being truly honest with myself about what I want?

Well, that's a handful. Where to start? At the end, of course.

Item one: How do you start figuring out what you want? Play God. Ignore all constraints of reality (money, skills, location, age, etc.) and imagine what you would do if you could do anything at all. Fantasize. Picture it in as much detail as you can: where would you be? what sorts of things would you do all day? with whom would you work? what would you be trying to accomplish? what would you have the chance to learn? Now and only now, start to bring back those constraints. Would you need to move? Get more education? Deal with objections from family or friends? Spend more money than you have? Are there any real show-stoppers? If so, can you tweak your fantasy to bring it a bit closer to reality.

Iterate this, and you will come close to what you really want.

Item two: stop lying to career advisors, or stop going to them. Why lie? They are there to help you but cannot do so if you don't tell them the truth. Did you run into advisors who were trying to pigeonhole you into their idea of what you should want?

Item three: If you are still floundering, and especially if item one yields several diverse ideas, just choose one and do something in that direction. Choose something that is a real break from what you have been doing, to minimize the chances of your falling back into loafing/TV habits. Not sure what you mean by a "gap year", but if it is a short-term job, internship, or volunteer activity, that might be just the thing, as long as you can: (1) learn from it, and (2) leverage it to take the next steps in your future. Wen I was in a similar situation some years ago, I joined the military. Didn't end up making it a career, but it gave me great experience and helped me on the path to my actual career.

Good luck!

 

[Destiny]

In short, I feel lost, want to work out where to go from here but don't know how to figure that out. I'm halfway through my a levels and as the summer holidays started today, it seems like a good time to decide on what my next step will be now I can think clearly away from school stress and pressure. Right now, I feel very pressured time wise into making a decision- yr13 starts in 7 weeks and we are all expected to apply to uni and in order to enrol into the year, besides the required as grades, you need to present your personal statement. I would love to go to uni, but for the independence and experience as opposed to any study. As I don't know what I want to study, I wouldn't be 100% committed to my studies so it seems like a waste of £40,000+. Ive considered gap years, apprenticeships, employment and I just don't know. The more I'm pushed into a decision the more I pull away and put it off, I hide behind 'masks', saying I want to do this or that because not knowing isn't an option. I've seen careers advisors and whilst lovely, there's a limit to what they can do and I find myself lying to them. Not deliberately or anything, but I think I struggle to be honest with myself sometimes, I find it hard to accept that I'm not a perfect well rounded student and that my ideal day is sat in bed binge watching TV shows and yes, tv and film watching is possibly my biggest 'hobby :/ '. I'm doing a levels in chem, bio, maths and art with further as levels in English literature and history, and even with all that breadth I still don't feel inspired or driven or fulfilled. I know its okay to not know, and its fine to just go with the flow but, to continue that metaphor, my 'river of life' has no flow. It feels stagnant. This has turned more into a stream of consciousness than anything but it helps to get things out of my head. What do I do? Do I just need to get out more and find a hobby? How do I start being truly honest with myself about what I want?

Take this advice from a person who didn't know what to study and ended up dropping out of school twice (it wasn't my choice to enrol into those schools, I only went to those schools to please my control-freak family and of course it didn't turn out too well because my depression and anxiety was triggered over there and I ended up dropping out )

If you don't know what to study, then you should postpone your studies and go work for a few years. The answer will come to you naturally after working for a few years. And if you feel like you want to further your studies, make sure you use your own money and avoid using your parents' money, because when you are using your own money to pay for your school fees, this would make you feel more motivated to do well in school.