Horney's neurotic coping strategies

[Economica]

Hmm, the Withdrawn coping strategy is supposed to be the rarest, but that vote is at 69% of 32 votes so far.

Think some Compliants and Aggressives are fooling themselves or is this to be expected from the respondents to such a poll on such an internet forum?

 

[Economica]

^ Was this a case of my Aggressive question causing Withdrawing from the thread?

 

[redacted]

withdrawn/compliant

I didn't read the descriptions...no need.

 

[garbage]

Withdrawn/aggressive. It was the only way I knew how to act as a child, and it's how I still act under stress. When I became depressed, I just withdrew from the situation, lest anyone see me as a flawed individual. When I suffered from panic attacks or was cornered and unable to withdraw, I lashed out at everyone around me in a very aggressive manner.

Oh, and how this has affected my relationships? Well, I recall getting invited out to a certain bar, comparing myself to other people, becoming self-critical and depressed, and then just leaving with little or no warning to my friends who invited me out. In another instance, namely my high school graduation, I had a panic attack and became aggressive toward my family and girlfriend at the time.. we broke up shortly after.

So, yeah.. major problems that I needed to solve.

 

[Gauche]

Hmm, the Withdrawn coping strategy is supposed to be the rarest, but that vote is at 69% of 32 votes so far.

Think some Compliants and Aggressives are fooling themselves or is this to be expected from the respondents to such a poll on such an internet forum?

Well, I think that you could expect that. Here are majorly Ns, Maybe Is as well, so this cannot be considered a general sample methinks

 

[Silent Stars]

withdrawn/compliant

 

[disregard]

What an interesting, insightful thread. Nice work econimica.~

 

[frenchkiss]

compliant/withdrawn.

 

[Athenian200]

I think I use all three of them.

I can't figure out which I use most...

Compliant/Aggressive, maybe? I figure I'm either that or Withdrawn/Compliant. I just can't seem to pick two. I'm far too aware of having used all of them. I don't have enough of a sense of proportion or instinct to say which I use more often, or more naturally. It sort of feels like I end up using whatever I think will work best.

 

[Kanamori]

I think I use all three of them.
...

I'm far too aware of having used all of them. I don't have enough of a sense of proportion or instinct to say which I use more often, or more naturally. It sort of feels like I end up using whatever I think will work best.

Ditto.

 

[miss fortune]

withdrawn/agressive...

I naturally withdraw from stressful situations- I'm the queen of ignoring things and pushing them to the side. I prefer to deal with things on my own in most cases. I guess anything less would make me feel "needy," like I must NEED other people instead of being enough of a person to do everything on my own.

Having been raised with an agressive sibling taught me to fight back in some cases instead of just escaping though, so I've learned to be more agressive thanks to that. You need to develop some agressive traits if surrounded by agressive people, or you start to think that you've ceased to exist...

 

[pippi]

This is interesting, when I first started reading about this I assumed aggression would at least be a backup, but I don't do any of those. So I'm withdraw(8)/withdraw(10) and in the rare case that there was no way to withdraw then compliance(1). Those three options were the only ones I could force myself to choose.

Hmm, the Withdrawn coping strategy is supposed to be the rarest, but that vote is at 69% of 32 votes so far.

Think some Compliants and Aggressives are fooling themselves or is this to be expected from the respondents to such a poll on such an internet forum?

Maybe it's a reflection of how strongly introverted the majority of this board is? Just a theory.

 

[Haphazard]

Probably withdrawn/aggressive?

I dunno...

 

[Economica]

Maybe it's a reflection of how strongly introverted the majority of this board is? Just a theory.

Introverts are probably more likely than extroverts to be withdrawn, but based on my own observation I don't think all or even most introverts necessarily prefer the withdrawn coping style. However, I'm willing to believe that most individuals who self-select onto an internet forum like this one do so, regardless of introversion. (Barring voting self-selection and/or people kidding themselves, the poll is kind of forcing me to. )

And on that note: All the other pure Aggressives are out pursuing power and recognition in the real world, aren't they?

 

[Haphazard]

Oh yeah! I figured out why I don't get it! There's no 'people are distracting! Get em away get em away!' option.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

I had a really hard time deciding the order there. Withdrawn/Compliant could be just as plausible as Compliant/Withdraw, really.

I tried to avoid letting my various other personality classifications alter my decision.

 

[sarah]

I think I have elements of both compliant and aggressive in me -- I definitey relate to this:

The need for affection and approval; pleasing others and being liked by them.
The need for a partner; one whom they can love and who will solve all problems.

and also this:

The need for social recognition; prestige and limelight.
The need for personal admiration; for both inner and outer qualities -- to be valued.
The need for personal achievement

I crave affection, and I don't really wish to stomp on others to get success for myself. However, I'm not at all self-effacing. I crave being admired by the very people I want affection from, and I admit I tend to be self-absorbed. So I voted "compliant/aggressive".

 

[Unique]

Does compliance actually work? I swear it doesn't...

Anyway I picked Aggressive/withdrawn

Aggression works extremely well with detachment making a good backup

 

[cafe]

Compliant/withdrawn and if people still don't get a clue, aggressive.

 

[nottaprettygal]

Aggressive/Withdrawn

When I am stressed, I initially feel a sense of superiority and the urge to prove people wrong and become successful. If the stress keeps amounting though, I usually need to pull away. This is usually due to self-doubt.