I don't consider myself to be easily hurt. I can usually just write potentially hurtful things people say off as their own problem or not very important, and don't get too hung up. As a person who uses Fi, I've often thought Fe users were more easily offended then Fi users (putting more weight into external feelings, etc.)
Why then are INFPs and ISFPs stereotypically so sensitive? I'm only a function flip away from being INFP. What's the big difference? What am I missing?
That's not really how I experience sensitivity.
Strangely enough, I find ExFPs to be more easily offended, or at least they react more loudly.
In person, it's hard for people to get reactions out of me.
If I react, it's to boundary violations usually or injustices. I don't start crying - I get PISSED.
I've never been sensitive in a soft way, which is almost unfortunate because that registers more as "caring" to others. Instead I've been called cantankerous or a prima donna, yet also told I have no feelings.
IxFPs also get misunderstood a lot more than ExFPs, & that can wear on you. There's an alienation & defensiveness that can develop.
My sensitivity is generally not specific to things people say/do to me much though. It's more like an awareness of all that falls short in the world & my life & the lives of others. It's a general feeling of disappointment & a longing sadness. INFPs are sensitive to imperfection, especially in ourselves. We're not nit-picky perfectionists - it's not about measurable standards. But it is sort of like the self is a fine-tuned scale for meaning, beauty, morality, etc, & so you must be sensitive to things to measure it correctly.
I might also be more sensitive than ExFPs to inconsistency in feeling-thoughts. I see it in others & it will annoy me. It's kind of how a Ti-dom responds to people being illogical. It can feel like you're one of the only people who makes sense. People around you can seem comically insincere, shallow, and fickle at times.