[ISFJ] Ask an ISFJ 1.0!

[incubustribute]

I have two questions for all ISFJ's:

What would be your motto in life?

Try to find what makes you happiest and stick with it for as long as possible.

and what do you stand by? (e.g. morals, values, principles)

Love unconditionally.

 

[Laurie]

It sounds like she did not know that a simple answer was best. She probably did not feel confident that you knew better and she felt obligated to inform you with all her words.

It's an always kind of thing. I guess I can apply that in a larger sense, it sounds right, actually.

 

[Little Laura]

Hi Giggly,

When you, an ISFJ, get mad at someone about something, do you cool off the next day and forget what you were mad about?

I know this wasn't directed at me....but....I do this ALL the time. I can't hold a grudge if my life depended on it. I have tried. It just takes so much more energy to focus on not being nice to someone. That being said, I can and will put people in their places if I need to. But usually apologize later if I felt it was a bit harsh. LOL

 

[Warm]

Why does my ISFJ mum insist on having her house so clean and tidy (to the point that it looks like no one actually lives there) when visitors are coming?

I reckon you lose a bit of character and charm if the house doesn't look lived in.

It's kinda funny. I'm not at all a tidy person, but when I know someone is coming over, I clean the place from top to bottom because I don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable or think that I'm untidy...which I am...

 

[JTG1984]

Dear ISFJs,

I hear that you like the lights off when you have sex, is that true?

 

[Little Laura]

Dear ISFJs,

I hear that you like the lights off when you have sex, is that true?

Do you even have sex?

BAHAHA! Oh dear. This makes me laugh. To be honest, I have been told that I am addicted to sex. Although, I once had sex with a guy that I had no feelings for at all. It made me feel so dirty that I wanted to tear my skin off.
I love sex when I am having sex with someone I care about. For me it's all about being enthusiastic and letting the person know that that is exactly where you want to be. Plus, that feeling of being so closely connected with someone...amazing!
I use to prefer having the lights on all the time, but I am begining to prefer a little light. I often close my eyes and focus more on the sensation of what is happening and sometimes seeing everything distracts me. It's not about being self-concious, it's about being able to focus. It's almost more intense when you remove the lights.
Who knows for others though? That's just me. LOL

 

[Giggly]

Dear ISFJs,

I hear that you like the lights off when you have sex, is that true?

Well, that depends. If he's good-looking lights on if he's ugly lights off please. jk

What Little Laura said.

 

[Little Laura]

Well, that depends. If he's good-looking lights on if he's ugly lights off please. jk

What Little Laura said.

BAHAHAHA! I knew you'd agree with me as I was writing it!

 

[IZthe411]

ISFJs

What do you feel is the difference between you and me, the ISTJ?

 

[JTG1984]

ISFJs

What do you feel is the difference between you and me, the ISTJ?

We have personality, you don't.

 

[Timeless]

Supposedly we are the worst possible match! Both in MBTI and in Socionics.

ENTP + ISFJ =

(...the computer is the ENTP)

What do you think about that? or better yet, what have you experiences been with ENTPs?

 

[tinker683]

Ooo...I like this thread! xD

Why does my ISFJ mum insist on having her house so clean and tidy (to the point that it looks like no one actually lives there) when visitors are coming?

I reckon you lose a bit of character and charm if the house doesn't look lived in.

I don't know about your Mom, but I do that because I want my guests to think I have my shit together (however false that may actually be)

I have two questions for all ISFJ's:

What would be your motto in life? and what do you stand by? (e.g. morals, values, principles)

1) "Perform thought and deed as you would have the same thought and deed performed unto yourself" or something like that. Basically, if I want someone to be nice to me then I need to be nice to them. If I want someone to work hard, I need to work hard first

2) I'm a Humanist and derive my values from that

When you, an ISFJ, get mad at someone about something, do you cool off the next day and forget what you were mad about?

I know this was directed at Giggly, but I thought I'd chip in an answer: It depends on what it is and who it is. If it's a friend or family member that I like then mostly likely yeah. If it's something I don't like though and if they did something to REALLY piss me off then I'll seethe for a few days but each day I'll become incrementally less annoyed.

Uhh, it just started. Give it time. Warm, tinker, and FeatheredFrenzy are not here and JTG is probably in vent.

Happy to chip in! Although, I work ALL the damn time so my answers will be probably in the evenings

If someone asks something that might be a touchy subject do you feel the need to over explain? I always thought it was "normal" since my smom did it and I grew up with it, then I learned a simple answer works wonders. If you don't feel the need then what do you think might be motivating her?

I actually have a very bad habit of doing this, as I always feel a 'simple' answer is insufficient as I need you to understand the who/what/when/why/where/context of said touchy subject.

On that note, don't ask me to explain how I first fell in love or what my depression was like or you'll get a 10-15 paragraph response

I hear that you like the lights off when you have sex, is that true?

I prefer them on, I like to see what I'm doing. Incidentally, the first time I had sex (which was with my ENFJ-ex) she insisted on the having the lights off...the first few times. I managed to ween her away from that and show her the glorious benefits of illumination

What do you feel is the difference between you and me, the ISTJ?

The only one I can think of is that a lot of ISTJ's that I know have an "ick" attitude toward touchy-feely romance stuff whereas I revel in it

I could be mixing them up with another type though

Supposedly we are the worst possible match! Both in MBTI and in Socionics.

ENTP + ISFJ =

(...the computer is the ENTP)

What do you think about that? or better yet, what have you experiences been with ENTPs?

I know one woman that I think is an ENTP and honestly I'd date her in a heartbeat...if she lived closer and didn't think I was some huge, cheesy dork . No, her and I get along great but honestly her and I are just two very different people. She's got a sugar high for science and geology and while I think that's cool and all...when I can't hold a discussion with her about it or when I don't show as much enthusiasm, it irks her.

Still, I think she's a very sweet woman who's been trashed a lot by guys and as such has walled her emotions in. She doesn't like it when I try to draw out the woman I know is underneath all that armor she has but for some strange reason she likes to talk to me a lot anyway. I think I'm slowly wearing her down with my love-dovey-sappiness

That or I'm just full of shit. Still, I like talking to her none the less and she seems to enjoy my company so it works. I could date an ENTP but I prefer ESxP's personally

 

[incubustribute]

Supposedly we are the worst possible match! Both in MBTI and in Socionics.

ENTP + ISFJ =

(...the computer is the ENTP)

What do you think about that? or better yet, what have you experiences been with ENTPs?

Honestly we'd be worse of with INTJ or ENTJ. I love ENTP's! What I've found is that as far as decision making goes, I can mesh well with their approach, but my Ti is probably a little more accented than most ISFJ's. It's when you get to the whole perception thing that I lose them. They're kind of on separate wavelengths with the way they see the world and the way they process information. But generally I have a harder time relating to ENFPs than ENTPs.

 

[incubustribute]

Dear ISFJs,

I hear that you like the lights off when you have sex, is that true?

That is most certainly not true.

 

[Snow Turtle]

If someone asks something that might be a touchy subject do you feel the need to over explain? I always thought it was "normal" since my smom did it and I grew up with it, then I learned a simple answer works wonders. If you don't feel the need then what do you think might be motivating her?

It's possible she's trying to cover all the bases. I usually give extremely long-winded confusing answers, to make sure that my listener knows everything. The downside, they usually switch off after a while

 

[incubustribute]

BAHAHA! Oh dear. This makes me laugh. To be honest, I have been told that I am addicted to sex.

I've had a theory that this is an ISxJ thing. I need to go to the mature section and ask that one. I feel like most of us innocent little Si doms are too scared to venture off that far into the deep end though. Maybe I'll do an anonymous poll...

The reason behind this (I think) is that Si doms have such a rich inner world of sensations, but it's all sort of oriented in the past. So once we've started that particular behavior, it's really kind of embedded into our brains as an intense sensual experience, and we have a hard time forgetting it.

 

[JTG1984]

Dear ISFJs,

How are you different from ISFPs?

Do you think you're better or worse human beings?

 

[incubustribute]

Dear ISFJs,

How are you different from ISFPs?

Do you think you're better or worse human beings?

must....resist....urge to explain.....functions....

We're definitely better at being consistent with our duties, but ISFPs probably have a better general outlook on life; they'd be much more attuned to improvising and figuring stuff out on their own than we would. When an ISFJ gets into deep trouble or gets depressed or something, we tend to extrovert our feeling side a LOT. We hang out with people, we listen to advice (and take it very seriously), we latch onto people who are close. ISFP would most likely try to rely on their own convictions and feelings on the matter and if that fails, go out and live for the moment to try to forget.

 

[Snow Turtle]

Which do ISFJ treat better: Family or Close Friends?

 

[JTG1984]

Which do ISFJ treat better: Family or Close Friends?

Friends are the family you choose.

I treat them both with love and respect.