[ISTJ] Are ISTJ's insecure?

[Lily flower]

Are ISTJ's ever insecure? What does that look like?

 

[swordpath]

I'd say avoidance.

 

[2XtremeENFP]

My ISTJ seems to be so humble that it may even be insecurity.

 

[Cimarron]

My ISTJ seems to be so humble that it may even be insecurity.

I think you are on to something. (Hi again!) I've been told something similar, by friends: That my timidity and accomodating stance (or whatever you'd want to call it) seems to stem from insecurity sometimes.

But what do we mean by "insecure"? Lily Flower sounds as if she expects it to be something that shakes an ISTJ's confidence in the moment, but usually it's things that are longer-term, eroding at the base of confidence over time. This may be harder to spot.

An easy way to throw them off is to catch them unaware and take away their usual options to solve it, but I don't think that's what you mean.

 

[2XtremeENFP]

I think you are on to something. (Hi again!) I've been told something similar, by friends: That my timidity and accomodating stance (or whatever you'd want to call it) seems to stem from insecurity sometimes.

But what do we mean by "insecure"? Lily Flower sounds as if she expects it to be something that shakes an ISTJ's confidence in the moment, but usually it's things that are longer-term, eroding at the base of confidence over time. This may be harder to spot.

An easy way to throw them off is to catch them unaware and take away their usual options to solve it, but I don't think that's what you mean.

Hi again to you too!!

Yeah, that is true. What kind of insecurity...

To branch more from what I see with my ISTJ it is a lack of confidence for sure. Especially in situations where a person would need to exude confidence in order to succeed. For example, job interviews. He is looking for a new job, but he doesn't do well in interviews because he doesn't like to sell himself, or brag about himself, because he views it as untrue and surface-level. He can't say things just to say it. I think it's because he isn't confident in his skills or knowledge, all he is confident in, is that fact that he will work hard, he will show up on time, and he will finish projects on time. But sometimes, employers need to see more of a strong desire and passion that I think ISTJs can lack and that can be viewed as insecurity......if that makes sense?

 

[Cimarron]

To branch more from what I see with my ISTJ it is a lack of confidence for sure. Especially in situations where a person would need to exude confidence in order to succeed. For example, job interviews. He is looking for a new job, but he doesn't do well in interviews because he doesn't like to sell himself, or brag about himself, because he views it as untrue and surface-level. He can't say things just to say it. I think it's because he isn't confident in his skills or knowledge, all he is confident in, is that fact that he will work hard, he will show up on time, and he will finish projects on time. But sometimes, employers need to see more of a strong desire and passion that I think ISTJs can lack and that can be viewed as insecurity......if that makes sense?

I completely relate to this. I don't think this scenario is, but I think other similar ones could just as well be. Hmm...

 

[Giggly]

My Dad is ISTJ and he's not insecure. Maybe younger ISTJs are, but I don't think they're any more insecure than any other type. They are often more modest though and don't go around bragging.

 

[d@v3]

Hi again to you too!!

Yeah, that is true. What kind of insecurity...

To branch more from what I see with my ISTJ it is a lack of confidence for sure. Especially in situations where a person would need to exude confidence in order to succeed. For example, job interviews. He is looking for a new job, but he doesn't do well in interviews because he doesn't like to sell himself, or brag about himself, because he views it as untrue and surface-level. He can't say things just to say it.

..I can totally relate to this! Job interviews are very awkward for me. It helps a lot when the interviewer knows me.

I think it's because he isn't confident in his skills or knowledge, all he is confident in, is that fact that he will work hard, he will show up on time, and he will finish projects on time. But sometimes, employers need to see more of a strong desire and passion that I think ISTJs can lack and that can be viewed as insecurity......if that makes sense?

Yeah, this is the annoying part. I just don't understand how you can see "strong desire" and "passion" talking for 20 minutes with someone you don't know. To me, these things are demonstrated not spoken.

As far as knowledge goes, here is an example:

I'm confident in what I know, but I'm not so sure as to how well I could teach others this same knowledge. This is difficult for me because I'm probably going to end up teaching the youth at some point. ...And as an ISTJ, I am not so excellent when it comes to dealing with the kiddies!

However, when it comes to knowledge on military or police protocols, I have full confidence in teaching. This is different though, because presumably, I would be teaching people who want to be there and need me to teach it to them!

 

[freeeekyyy]

I'm sure they can be, but no more or less than any other type. It may manifest differently from some though.

 

[Orangey]

I imagine that if they were truly insecure they would be the avoidant/angry type with deep paranoia about how the world is against him/her.

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

I just don't understand how you can see "strong desire" and "passion" talking for 20 minutes with someone you don't know. To me, these things are demonstrated not spoken.

Amen. I can relate to this.

 

[miss fortune]

mine's about as secure as a lump of granite... I've never seen him flustered about ANYTHING... he is disturbingly calm

seriously, I've never seen him be anything EXCEPT for calm!

 

[Mal12345]

Are ISTJ's ever insecure? What does that look like?

All I can say is that I know an ISTJ who is insecure. What does that look like? Social anxiety covered up with a lot of bluster and loudness.

 

[2XtremeENFP]

Yeah, this is the annoying part. I just don't understand how you can see "strong desire" and "passion" talking for 20 minutes with someone you don't know. To me, these things are demonstrated not spoken.

haha this is interesting, my istj says the same things! I think as a NF maybe I feel more connected to showing it easily and reading it easily. He gets so frustrated when I try and get him to think differently about this so I just kinda stopped trying haha

 

[bcubchgo]

mine's about as secure as a lump of granite... I've never seen him flustered about ANYTHING... he is disturbingly calm

seriously, I've never seen him be anything EXCEPT for calm!

just because he doesn't externalize it with you (probably because he feels secure with you) it doesn't mean he isn't bothered by things. if he encountered someone or something that would seriously challenge or disturb his model of behavior or normality it would probably disturb him. ISTJ's thrown into the middle of situations they don't understand can be highly disruptive and volatile.

 

[miss fortune]

just because he doesn't externalize it with you (probably because he feels secure with you) it doesn't mean he isn't bothered by things. if he encountered someone or something that would seriously challenge or disturb his model of behavior or normality it would probably disturb him. ISTJ's thrown into the middle of situations they don't understand can be highly disruptive and volatile.

nope... he just sits back and watches like a cat... it's positively admirable

 

[Cimarron]

haha this is interesting, my istj says the same things! I think as a NF maybe I feel more connected to showing it easily and reading it easily. He gets so frustrated when I try and get him to think differently about this so I just kinda stopped trying haha

"If I could show passionate interest and excitement so easily with a stranger like that, then I wouldn't even be me anymore..." It could be frustrating in this way.

 

[Owfin]

Uh, I'm not insecure! Right guys?

 

[kdpianochickk]

I think everyone gets insecure at times... when I am, I either try to just suck it up and get over it, because obviously, there is a task at hand that I must handle, or I try to take a super temporary break from the situation...

 

[kidd]

Some of my family accus me of being insecure. I'd rather regress into my autistic coma. When in a situation where I can't get away.