Amalgam
Member
- Joined
- Jan 21, 2009
- Messages
- 119
- MBTI Type
- INTP
- Enneagram
- 5w4
Yoga's great. Too bad I've been slacking on my work. Oh, I gave up pot. It was messing with my memory recall which I've always been on. I'm taking fish oil tablets now. Other than that it was a fairly active spring break. I really should have studied harder. It looks like I'll be able to move at the end of summer. This summer is already starting to look great. I just need to stay focused as being a computer science newb I need to learn as much as possible in that one. I've probably skipped at least one midterm so I'll take a late starting class if I have to. I'm disappointed with myself more and more, or maybe I've just been noticing it now.
I've been on typology quite a bit lately. Just chatting and it's interesting to hear the voice at the end of the rope. I'm thinking: should I stay or should I go now. I've been saving money religiously, but now I have a ticket for speeding and I lost my wallet on the same day. It's somewhere in my house I'm pretty certain. My credit card and checking cards are blocked now and I have no ID. That and I've been trying to study as much as possible.
I've mainly gotten over Jennifer, but I might want to be platonic friends. I highly doubt that she will, but there are more out there...I just don't address them much. I have been socializing again which is nice after these last few years of hiding from myself. I ask myself, would my life be any better with her around and how much she costs and really at this point I don't know what to do so I ignore it. It's also horrible that her phone number is in my wallet, and I don't have another way of contacting her. I don't think she checks her email at all. But I've written this massive letter, but it's a saved draft; I can't stand the thought of losing my perception of her while being tempted to blow the whole situation to hell.
I don't know. I just don't know. Plus I don't know about the whole creep idea. I'd hate to be considered that. So instead I wait months end and she's never called. I guess I can't really label it as either good or bad, but neutral. I used to really care about her and I still wish she has a good life, but I think the bad sex might have been a major downturn. What can I say it's just awkward to me now after not seeing a naked woman and I've got like pornodick. Regular sex hasn't done it for me, but I really should have played doctor with her. Whatever.
To be honest I'll probably send her a short email stating where I stand. The whole of the other one doesn't need to be known and I'll keep a hold of it digitally. At least it didn't do me too much harm besides the grades and money. I don't think I could afford one or if I'm even ready to be looking. I'm just trying to be a floater, while my legs pull me under. It takes so much energy to even think about it.
Well, that's enough vomit for tonight. I hope you all sleep well.
And for someone that wanted to know, I live. Is cripple around these parts?
I've been on typology quite a bit lately. Just chatting and it's interesting to hear the voice at the end of the rope. I'm thinking: should I stay or should I go now. I've been saving money religiously, but now I have a ticket for speeding and I lost my wallet on the same day. It's somewhere in my house I'm pretty certain. My credit card and checking cards are blocked now and I have no ID. That and I've been trying to study as much as possible.
I've mainly gotten over Jennifer, but I might want to be platonic friends. I highly doubt that she will, but there are more out there...I just don't address them much. I have been socializing again which is nice after these last few years of hiding from myself. I ask myself, would my life be any better with her around and how much she costs and really at this point I don't know what to do so I ignore it. It's also horrible that her phone number is in my wallet, and I don't have another way of contacting her. I don't think she checks her email at all. But I've written this massive letter, but it's a saved draft; I can't stand the thought of losing my perception of her while being tempted to blow the whole situation to hell.
I don't know. I just don't know. Plus I don't know about the whole creep idea. I'd hate to be considered that. So instead I wait months end and she's never called. I guess I can't really label it as either good or bad, but neutral. I used to really care about her and I still wish she has a good life, but I think the bad sex might have been a major downturn. What can I say it's just awkward to me now after not seeing a naked woman and I've got like pornodick. Regular sex hasn't done it for me, but I really should have played doctor with her. Whatever.
To be honest I'll probably send her a short email stating where I stand. The whole of the other one doesn't need to be known and I'll keep a hold of it digitally. At least it didn't do me too much harm besides the grades and money. I don't think I could afford one or if I'm even ready to be looking. I'm just trying to be a floater, while my legs pull me under. It takes so much energy to even think about it.
Well, that's enough vomit for tonight. I hope you all sleep well.
And for someone that wanted to know, I live. Is cripple around these parts?
