lol
i think clingy as in texting too often or calling too often in the beginning of the courtship.
i got out of a 4 year relationship where i was used to feeling stable, so during the entire courtship phase, i needed that stability again. so it led me to text or call too much, especially during the time of "holding out" the girl does.
i couldn't understand some things bc i was used to my ex not texting back if she was mad about something. then it made me think they were mad at me for some reason... i dunno. sent me down a spiral in a weird way. whereas if i was more aloof (like when i was used to being single) things would have worked out much smoother.
Relationships are not easy. That is for sure. Even with my husband, I am continuously learning and growing - finding out more about human nature.
Most times, I just have a "feeling" or a "gut instinct" regarding the right thing to do. But perhaps I also rely a little bit more than the typical ENFP on the experience I have had. I attribute that to the S/N balance...Intuition combined with an appreciation of experience.
Alas, there is no "formula" regarding how to act in a given situation, since every situation is different. It depends greatly on the person's personality and the mutual feelings and energy that is there....
...Which is what makes MBTI so fascinating because personality is really the crux of human experience. So even a few human beings' attempt to take something so complex, so marvellous, so beautiful - and transcribe it into a formula is something that interests me a great deal.
So, I go back to what I said earlier: You should be true to yourself. Let the chips fall where they may. If you are not true to yourself, your own personality, your own feelings, your own self, it will not bode well for any relationship.
Which is not to say that one should not learn, grow and develop. It also does not mean to have total disregard for others' feelings. But it does mean do NOT put yourself second. It is best to have a good regard for yourself and the other person. Be strong. Be you.