iNtrovert
New member
- Joined
- Nov 28, 2012
- Messages
- 359
- MBTI Type
- Ni
- Enneagram
- 4w5
- Instinctual Variant
- sp/so
As an NF I find it easy to empathize with others but In certain situations I can become unsympathetic or emotionally closed off. Personally I've noticed I do this in the following situations:
1. When I'm not being listened to.
2. when I feel like I'm being taken advantage of.
3. When the person is not considering the feelings of other people around them.
4. When I feel that person has been given every possible resource to succeed and chose not to take advantage of them.
5. When that person is being ignorant.
6.When I lose respect for someone.
7.When I have been personally wronged.
8.When that person has wronged someone close to me.
In these situations I can become very judgmental,hold grudges, lose empathy and otherwise shutdown to that individual. I'm trying not to do that because people can change but in my defense it takes a lot for me to get to that point. It's normally a combination of all these things that I let build up and then one day it all comes boiling up to the surface the end result is usually an emotional wedge between me and that person. Then every time I try to feel sorry for them it's like there's an emotional road block there. It's like there's this brick wall between me and the people I have relationships with. The more connections I form with them over time the more bricks I remove from my wall. The converse is also true the more they do on my mental/emotional checklist the more bricks I add until I'm emotionally shut off. I guess I'd describe my individual relationships with people as a series of walls or a maze, some with more dead ends than others. This loss of empathy would occur in the sense that the whole maze is a dead end with no entry or exit and I'm completely closed off to them.
I was wondering if other NF's get like this. If so in what situations?
1. When I'm not being listened to.
2. when I feel like I'm being taken advantage of.
3. When the person is not considering the feelings of other people around them.
4. When I feel that person has been given every possible resource to succeed and chose not to take advantage of them.
5. When that person is being ignorant.
6.When I lose respect for someone.
7.When I have been personally wronged.
8.When that person has wronged someone close to me.
In these situations I can become very judgmental,hold grudges, lose empathy and otherwise shutdown to that individual. I'm trying not to do that because people can change but in my defense it takes a lot for me to get to that point. It's normally a combination of all these things that I let build up and then one day it all comes boiling up to the surface the end result is usually an emotional wedge between me and that person. Then every time I try to feel sorry for them it's like there's an emotional road block there. It's like there's this brick wall between me and the people I have relationships with. The more connections I form with them over time the more bricks I remove from my wall. The converse is also true the more they do on my mental/emotional checklist the more bricks I add until I'm emotionally shut off. I guess I'd describe my individual relationships with people as a series of walls or a maze, some with more dead ends than others. This loss of empathy would occur in the sense that the whole maze is a dead end with no entry or exit and I'm completely closed off to them.
I was wondering if other NF's get like this. If so in what situations?