PeaceBaby said:
I think if the ENFJ can truly emerge as a leader here there is still space for reparation
Tallulah said:
what exactly makes a good leader?
yes, it's an interesting question, isn't it.
helpful, perhaps, would be the idea of picking and choosing battles. she can have primary say in the big calls, but in little things, she may need to just let a little bit go and let other members do as they please. she wants what she wants, but because her vision
requires other people, she's going to have to deal with the slightly messy reality of working with them. she can allow for a little deviation without losing her vision - the important part of it, at least.
you and the others might be able to help her figure out what each person really needs to be happy about how the band is going, and how to meet these needs without losing sight of the "heart" of the band itself. she will need to let Fe guide Ni, instead of vice versa.
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theoretical tangent:
unfortunately i have been in a group where a (tested, self-confirmed) NFJ leader just decided to ignore the people he didn't like. the problem with that is that the group no longer becomes a group about something, it becomes the NFJ's group. now, in the case of my group, i have to admit that i trusted the NFJ more readily than a lot of other members, and he tended to ignore people who i felt acted in ways that were detrimental to the group. however, i feel like i was okay with it because our conceptions of what the group should be were very similar. if i had different ideas, i may have been less content.
i am very much in favor of group mission statements for this reason in groups whose leaders will inevitably change (for example, in college groups whose leaders will graduate). that keeps the group anchored to a mission agreed upon by all individuals up front, and delineates the boundaries for what can be questioned and what cannot. people can then latch onto that mission as they please - through Ni envisioning, Fi idealism, whatever - but there's something besides people defining what the group is about, which gives the group itself - as a whole - a lasting identity.
though of course in the case of a band, which may not exist without certain members, that is less necessarily applicable.