[ENTJ] Communication with an ENTJ?

[TheEmeraldCanopy]

I'm friends with an ENTJ, yet I often find I struggle with talking to her. I feel very unsure of what to say. I wish this wasn't the case, and that we could have more naturally flowing conversations without me second guessing myself.

I suppose it's because I'm unsure of how my comments affect her. I do seem to be able to crack her up though occasionally, and that reassures me. I look up to her strength and how self sufficient she is, and I know she is a great person.


What kind of things do ENTJs like to talk about? Any advice for an INFP?

 

[professor goodstain]

internally put more focus on clearity than harmony in your conversations. Kroeger and Thuesen 101.

 

[juggernaut]

Well this ENTJ absolutely loves discussions of a philosophical nature; especially topics in epistemology, methaphysics, logic, and philosophy of science. I also really enjoy discussions about bioethics and aesthetics (so much the better if you can tie these issues to those listed in the previous sentence, e.g., is there a difference between an elegant proof and a beautiful proof?). Theorizing about various systems ...physical, logical, mathematical, biological...will get my attention in a heartbeat as well. Bits of gossip now and then are tolerable, but generally only if they're moving the conversation toward something more substantial (such as "did you see how ridiculous Dennett and Dawkins were behaving in that interview?"...apologies to the devout atheists among us).

internally put more focus on clearity than harmony in your conversations. Kroeger and Thuesen 101.

Very good suggestion. The best idea clouded in gobbledlygook is just gobbledygook to us.

 

[LadyJaye]

My best friend is an ENTJ, and we talk for hours about all sorts of things. She loves it when I can introduce her to something new that she's never heard of or seen before - anything smart and sharp. I don't have to worry about how my words affect her, because if there's a problem, she'll alert me to it. But we rarely have that problem because we're both fairly blunt talkers, and don't offend easily with one another.

One thing I've noticed through my years of friendship with her, and with other ENTJ's, is that they're amazing listeners, always reflecting back what I've said to let me know they're hearing me.

 

[Walkman]

I'm a male ENTJ and my closest confidant is a female ENTJ. I think both of us prefer people to be extremely direct and to the point. Don't "beat around the bush".

Most of my friends are NT's -- the main thing we seem to have in common is that we enjoy talking about almost anything.

ENTJ's act more self sufficient that we really are. There can be a lot of "F" hidden below the surface of an an ENTJ.

 

[BlackCat]

My best friend is an ENTJ, and we talk for hours about all sorts of things. She loves it when I can introduce her to something new that she's never heard of or seen before - anything smart and sharp. I don't have to worry about how my words affect her, because if there's a problem, she'll alert me to it. But we rarely have that problem because we're both fairly blunt talkers, and don't offend easily with one another.

One thing I've noticed through my years of friendship with her, and with other ENTJ's, is that they're amazing listeners, always reflecting back what I've said to let me know they're hearing me.

I can relate to everything you just said here.

I'm a male ENTJ and my closest confidant is a female ENTJ. I think both of us prefer people to be extremely direct and to the point. Don't "beat around the bush".

Most of my friends are NT's -- the main thing we seem to have in common is that we enjoy talking about almost anything.

ENTJ's act more self sufficient that we really are. There can be a lot of "F" hidden below the surface of an an ENTJ.

Do you not show that "F" side of yourself because you see it as irrelevant to show, or what? Also I love that sharp and to the point style, I really do. I get tired of bullshit in conversations a lot of the time, and I don't usually get that with you guys.

I'm pretty sure it's an N trait to like to talk about theory, and you could expand this as "anything." It wouldn't bother me to talk about something that didn't have much to do with me, it's just fun to talk about that kind of stuff.

Also welcome aboard the forums, you ENTJs rock. You ought to make an introductory post!

 

[Bougal]

I have an INFP friend and we always had wonderful conversations about the motives of individuals. We talk for hours about the reasons for wars, the minds of sexual predators, the senselessness of nationalism and mindset of our classmates. We also have wonderful conversations about our desires to travel the world, philosophy and the art that we create. We watch a lot of movies together, and then we dissect them after.

I love the passion that you guys have, and when I am around you it is contagious- - I feel most passionate when I am with one of you.

 

[chegra]

I'm friends with an ENTJ, yet I often find I struggle with talking to her. I feel very unsure of what to say. I wish this wasn't the case, and that we could have more naturally flowing conversations without me second guessing myself.

I suppose it's because I'm unsure of how my comments affect her. I do seem to be able to crack her up though occasionally, and that reassures me. I look up to her strength and how self sufficient she is, and I know she is a great person.


What kind of things do ENTJs like to talk about? Any advice for an INFP?

Yep everybody is on point, anything about theory or anything new.
Oh yea one point to note, I dont know if its an entj thing or its just me, but I dont think we like "yes" person.

We might tolerate them but when it comes to getting close we need critical people.
Not someone who will accept every idea that pops into our head.

ENTJ, value those type of critical relationships because we tend to make hasty decisions. Having another point of view provides us with perspective.

 

[Bougal]

Oh yea one point to note, I dont know if its an entj thing or its just me, but I dont think we like "yes" person.

We might tolerate them but when it comes to getting close we need critical people.
Not someone who will accept every idea that pops into our head.

ENTJ, value those type of critical relationships because we tend to make hasty decisions. Having another point of view provides us with perspective.

I agree with this.

 

[professor goodstain]

Yep everybody is on point, anything about theory or anything new.
Oh yea one point to note, I dont know if its an entj thing or its just me, but I dont think we like "yes" person.

We might tolerate them but when it comes to getting close we need critical people.
Not someone who will accept every idea that pops into our head.

ENTJ, value those type of critical relationships because we tend to make hasty decisions. Having another point of view provides us with perspective.

Yes. me too. Yes.

 

[Rangler]

Let us know when we do something you appreciate. We really do like feeling valuable.

 

[Kangirl]

Be direct and forward. I can enjoy talking about anything - *anything* - but I appreciate directness very, very much. Beating around the bush = frustrated ENTJ.

 

[htb]

Beating around the bush = frustrated ENTJ.

Which could lead to an acerbic ENTJ, likely resulting in a reticent INFP, likely resulting in a pertinacious ENTJ, etcetera.

INFPs: Don't deny conflict, especially if debates contribute to a cooperative effort. Try to appreciate the ENTJ's low priority given to consensus for its own sake, particularly when the two of you are in agreement and a third party is preventing your team from achieving its goals.

 

[Edgar]

Talk to an ENTJ about business ventures, or various ways of how to eliminate competition.

They eat that shit up.

Also, male ENTJs love to talk about military history, and female ENTJs love to talk about how "all guys want" her.

 

[Venom]

I'm a male ENTJ and my closest confidant is a female ENTJ. I think both of us prefer people to be extremely direct and to the point. Don't "beat around the bush".

Most of my friends are NT's -- the main thing we seem to have in common is that we enjoy talking about almost anything.

ENTJ's act more self sufficient that we really are. There can be a lot of "F" hidden below the surface of an an ENTJ.

ENTJs have what you might call...a gooey center

As far as who has great communication with ENTJs: i think you all should check out ISTPs. The ones that arent borderline personality disorder (running around breaking and stealing shit for their own amusement) are REALLY awesome. They really relate to the NT temperament, and their Ni is an auxiliary. I think their Ti-Ni axis paired with Se works a lot like our Te-Se axis paired with Ni. We both can get really into "what is 'actually' going on", cutting away at the fat, or theories that have no basis in reality etc


My ISTP friend and I can debate anything, no matter how personal or offensive it should be to the other. That is a good thing in the world of ENTJ.

 

[Lexinator]

I have an INFP friend and we always had wonderful conversations about the motives of individuals. We talk for hours about the reasons for wars, the minds of sexual predators, the senselessness of nationalism and mindset of our classmates. We also have wonderful conversations about our desires to travel the world, philosophy and the art that we create. We watch a lot of movies together, and then we dissect them after.

I love the passion that you guys have, and when I am around you it is contagious- - I feel most passionate when I am with one of you.

Passionate, entrepreneurial, philosophical and intellectual discussion topics rule the day !

 

[Frank]

Just let it flow freely. Unless it's complete horse shit I tend not to judge people by what they say and appeciate candor and imaginative converstions. Actions are more susceptible to my judgement any day.

 

[Kangirl]

female ENTJs love to talk about how "all guys want" her

SO true.

Wait. Edgar, what are you saying?

Actions are more susceptible to my judgement any day.

Me too. A lot.

 

[FDG]

I'm an ENTJ, over time I've developed a dislike for any kind of "deep" or "theorethical" kind of talk. I prefer small talk, bullshit, or joking.

 

[Marc790]

Damn right. A lot of times, I'd be stuck in meetings or just having a conversation with someone, and if I had any hair, would pull that shit out, because people take 20 minutes to ask a simple question. Yet, my prompting to hurry up gets viewed as my being an asshole. Well, I am an asshole, but truth is, I am one who gets to the point.

ENTJ's, it seems, can weave ideas into sentences with ease; it becomes frustrating when others can't do that.

Marc

I'm a male ENTJ and my closest confidant is a female ENTJ. I think both of us prefer people to be extremely direct and to the point. Don't "beat around the bush".

Most of my friends are NT's -- the main thing we seem to have in common is that we enjoy talking about almost anything.

ENTJ's act more self sufficient that we really are. There can be a lot of "F" hidden below the surface of an an ENTJ.