[ENFP] enfp's fact or fiction

[targobelle]

As I search these forums I realize the least posted about MBTI type is actually the enfp. It was rather shocking to me as I am an enfp, and I think we may be actually the least known of all the types.

Anyway I wanted to add a place in here for members to learn a little about this long lost type and decided that enfp's could help you all understand us better.

 

[Schizm]

 

[targobelle]

Nothing useful to add I see...... :rolli:

 

[Sahara]

Ok, one thing I always read about ENFP's is the "grass is always greener on the other side", how does it feel to you to constantly be considered the cheating type? also I realise that you are not like that, but was there a point in your life before you fell in love with your husband that you did find yourself stuck in the "grass is always greener on the other side" mindset? and how did it feel to you?

EDIT: none of this is meant to cause offence, I just wished to hear it from an enfp perspective

 

[lastrailway]

I think both my elder and younger sisters are ENFPs, the older maybe INFP but with low I.
They both tend to take things very personally, so sometimes I have to really choose my words very carefully not to offend them. Especially with the young one who is in a sensitive age, because my elder sister I consider her to be adult enough not to get offended so easily. Really, sometimes talking with them is like walking around a minefield
Besides that, they are both very sweet girls, both very sincere and direct and well-liked. But then, maybe I am typing them wrong. I am not very good in typing other people (or even my own self)

 

[Lateralus]

Ok, one thing I always read about ENFP's is the "grass is always greener on the other side", how does it feel to you to constantly be considered the cheating type?

I've ranted about this more than a few times because I think it's BS. I don't think ENFPs are more likely to cheat. I think that when they are young and immature, ENFPs are more likely to drop one relationship for something else, but that's not the same as cheating. If cheating goes against the principles of the ENFP (and I think it's against the principles of most people), they will not do it. This behavior is not an issue with a mature ENFP.

I think there are other types that have a greater tendency to cheat, they just have fewer opportunities.

 

[Totenkindly]

Still, NPs all suffer to some degree with the "grass is greener" syndrome -- the ability to imagine possibilities, coupled with the dislike for closure, can be a real kicker sometimes.

F just tends to flit more than T, and E tends to get immersed more in the outer world of possibility than I (who sits at home and gets lost in the individual world more often)... which is why ENFP tends to be considered more of the wanderers.

But this is not the same as cheating, and mature ENFPs (with highly developed Fi) can have very strong moral values that impose some restraint. I would guess that those who focus more on Fi and less on Ne have it easier, those with a very strong Ne might flit more.

 

[Wolf]

ENFPs are super attractive, uplifting, and so-forth. I like ENFPs, they're great.

The thing is that they aren't really like the people mentioned above, I think they're thinking of the ESFP, because ENFPs are like introverted extroverts. Every single one I've known had a distinct ability to be rather alone without notable negative effects, though they often yearned for more, they could also be content in this state much easier (and longer) than any other extrovert I've come in contact with. They're also the only non-NT extrovert that seem to enjoy being social online, but I have yet to understand why this is.

I'd say they're the most alluring NF with the least need to make an effort to be. ENFJs are often difficult, INFPs are kinda spacey, and INFJs tend to take forever to warm up to people (yet I really like them and they like me).

 

[targobelle]

I have to say that I am enjoying reading what members think about enfp's.

I must admit that I have thought long and hard about the 'grass' on the other side of the fence, and while my curiosity has been peaked on many occasions I am not one who personally is really interested in actually checking it out. For now the fantasy of my mind is enough to keep me happy.

 

[Valiant]

I am ENFP, and you got to take into focus that some things we just don't want to change beacuse of morals and other factors.
For an example, I work for 12 days per month and i'm off for 16 days in a row. Ship electrician. Those 16 days I spend doing wild shit, partying all over the country and outside of it at various places. I have paid trips so it doesn't really matter where I am, the thing that matters is that i'm back after 16 days in not to roughed up shape. My kind of ENFP is the adventurer. But I really appreciate emotional stability. More than adventuring. ENFP isn't just one person and a lot of factors, each of us is different... I know a few ENFP's that i'd like to kill because they are so fucking unstable XD no not really kill... But you know... Some of them reeeeally irritates me.

 

[miked277]

enfps are great fun. i think i saw this said in another thread here or on intpc but you can give an enfp any kind of input and they will make it fun or funny.

i could go on, but the basic principle here is everyone should have an enfp friend

 

[spirilis]

The ENFPs I know are incredibly fun, socially warm people who always try to get along with everyone, but they are definitely fragile in some ways albeit try their hardest to hide it. I find I can bounce thoughts off their mind like a game of ping-pong without having to watch what I say much, and if I bring up a touchy topic I always qualify my intentions as honest and sincere, and they never have any trouble accepting that.

The couple ENFPs I have in mind (one male, one female) I try to maintain a position of "true friend" to them, someone they can babble on about anything (personal or not) while assuming my trustworthiness (which I keep) and they both seem content with that.

Another ENFP I know, who I work with, maintains his professional distance from me but frequently the barriers drop and he exposes his silly side.

I'd say if I could pick someone to go on a pleasure-seeking road trip with, it'd be an ENFP. (I went on a short road trip ~4hr each way with the male ENFP friend; he, my INTJ roommate and I drove out to Pittsburgh one time and while my roommate was the least silly and most quiet of us, the ENFP and I were joking to the point that I could hardly breathe for 5 minutes straight)

 

[Metamorphosis]

Like Wolf said, I've also noticed that they are like introverted extraverts. They are awesome, but harder to find.

 

[Lookin4theBestNU]

So.....do we get to grill you with questions we have always wanted to know about you guys?

 

[targobelle]

well that was actually what I thought would happen to be honest. We could set the record straight... Although you must realize that we can be sensitive at times so if you could take that into consideration when "grilling" that would be much appreciated! lol

 

[Wolf]

The ENFPs I know are incredibly fun, socially warm people who always try to get along with everyone, but they are definitely fragile in some ways albeit try their hardest to hide it. I find I can bounce thoughts off their mind like a game of ping-pong without having to watch what I say much, and if I bring up a touchy topic I always qualify my intentions as honest and sincere, and they never have any trouble accepting that.

That's probably the most difficult thing about the ENFP. I don't know when I'm hurting them because they hide it so well. It's also really weird that they don't seem to be offended by your holding any point of view, but it's kinda neat at the same time, because you'll very seldom end up in an argument... The question is how to tell when to back down so they don't feel trampled upon; I can see that you might need to ask them what they think about something rather than asserting your thoughts first.

Regardless...

 

[cafe]

My dear friend of . . . almost ten years (wow! I'm feeling a little old here-- my now almost eleven year old son was still nursing when my friend pounced into my life) is an ENFP.

She keeps being too busy with real life to play with me here. :sad:

No questions at this time, just lots of

 

[targobelle]

I like being defined as an enfp

 

[Lookin4theBestNU]

OK here is the question for any ENFPs who would care to answer....


Let's say there were some tasks that you REALLY did not want/like to do. What "tactics" might you employ to get out of doing them given 'outright refusal' was not an option? If you have time could you also please explain the process of reasoning that would go into your answer(s).

 

[niffer]

but they are definitely fragile in some ways albeit try their hardest to hide it. I find I can bounce thoughts off their mind like a game of ping-pong without having to watch what I say much, and if I bring up a touchy topic I always qualify my intentions as honest and sincere, and they never have any trouble accepting that.

We are good at swallowing.

OK here is the question for any ENFPs who would care to answer....


Let's say there were some tasks that you REALLY did not want/like to do. What "tactics" might you employ to get out of doing them given 'outright refusal' was not an option? If you have time could you also please explain the process of reasoning that would go into your answer(s).

Assuming these are things assigned to me by other people:

- postpone doing the task (or hint at the fact that you may have to)
You have to ease your way out of it...make yourself seem difficult. Hopefully there will be someone else better or more available-seeming for the job that could take over for you..
This includes hiding when they come looking for you, not showing up and making excuses when they set times to talk to you, shying away from topics, etc.

- make other lame excuses
If they refuse to accept them then they'll seem inconsiderate...

- fake a breakdown (either emotional or physical - whichever is most convenient)
People never see me this way. They'll inevitably feel bad for me..

- explain why you sincerely cannot do it
Most reasonable people should understand my reasonable reason as to why I wouldn't want to do whatever it is...

- slowly shut off more and more of you to them until they get the picture
Note: this is the last resort
I am one to respond to people as much as possible. Showing that I am no longer willing to communicate with them serves a double purpose.