Maou
Mythos
- Joined
- Jun 20, 2018
- Messages
- 6,153
- MBTI Type
- INTP
- Enneagram
- 549
- Instinctual Variant
- sx/sp
Before I begin, just wanted to say this is in no way an attack on people who have to take these in order to function. This is just my experience.
Last year in August, I was going through a very difficult time in my life. I visited my abusive family for the first time in almost 10 years for closure, and my long time cat passed away suddenly with cancer. Many people I knew, had passed away. I was starting to have a difficult time functioning without being on the verge of a panic attack, and or suicidal thoughts. So I went and seen a doctor for my depression and they put me on Zoloft. I took this for about 4-5 months. During the time span, I noticed significant changes to my thought processes. It turned off my "anxiety", but my brain didn't know how to function without it. My memory especially, was affected. I was confusing reality, with something I dreamed more than once. I would forget simple tasks, or forget what I came to the store for. My recall, suffered heavily. But hey, it helped with my depression right?
No, not really. It just killed my emotions. I stopped feeling positive, or negative. It was endless apathy, without anxiety. Therefor nothing felt exciting as well. This, combined with my cognitive decline in sharpness, began to bother me more than anything else. I began to miss some of the aspects of my condition, because they helped me function in certain ways better than without it. As the whole 3 days grace song says "Id rather feel pain, than nothing at all", resonates with me. Because without pain, I do not even feel alive. So I tried switching what I was on, to Lexepro, and it turned out to be much better for me. But still, it does the same thing as Zoloft where it fucks with my memory. While it isn't as bad, it does allows for some of my condition to seep through to give me something emotional to work with. I got diagnosed with cPTSD, and probably have PMDD. I will soon be off these SSRI, and hopefully, my memory will come back.
Has anyone else experienced something similar on these drugs?
Last year in August, I was going through a very difficult time in my life. I visited my abusive family for the first time in almost 10 years for closure, and my long time cat passed away suddenly with cancer. Many people I knew, had passed away. I was starting to have a difficult time functioning without being on the verge of a panic attack, and or suicidal thoughts. So I went and seen a doctor for my depression and they put me on Zoloft. I took this for about 4-5 months. During the time span, I noticed significant changes to my thought processes. It turned off my "anxiety", but my brain didn't know how to function without it. My memory especially, was affected. I was confusing reality, with something I dreamed more than once. I would forget simple tasks, or forget what I came to the store for. My recall, suffered heavily. But hey, it helped with my depression right?
No, not really. It just killed my emotions. I stopped feeling positive, or negative. It was endless apathy, without anxiety. Therefor nothing felt exciting as well. This, combined with my cognitive decline in sharpness, began to bother me more than anything else. I began to miss some of the aspects of my condition, because they helped me function in certain ways better than without it. As the whole 3 days grace song says "Id rather feel pain, than nothing at all", resonates with me. Because without pain, I do not even feel alive. So I tried switching what I was on, to Lexepro, and it turned out to be much better for me. But still, it does the same thing as Zoloft where it fucks with my memory. While it isn't as bad, it does allows for some of my condition to seep through to give me something emotional to work with. I got diagnosed with cPTSD, and probably have PMDD. I will soon be off these SSRI, and hopefully, my memory will come back.
Has anyone else experienced something similar on these drugs?