Now adolescence lasts until the person is 25

[Speed Gavroche]

also, that would mean that women go through the vast majority of their sexual prime before they are even considered "adults", which is ridiculous imo.

Indeed, it's completely ridiculous.

what's next, they raise the age of consent to 25? fuck that! If fucking people under age 25 makes me a fellon, you can send me to jail right now, cuz I'm a carnivore and I demand fresh meat!

You're right.

people develop at different paces and that we need to recognize that when they are being counseled on psychological issues.

The directive doesn't adapt to the individual pace of the person, it etablish "everyone is a kid until 25" as a norm. It's different. And it's bullshit.

 

[Lark]

I knew this thread would occasion a bunch of age of conscent posts and that simultaneously makes me sick and fucking despair a little.

 

[Elfboy]

oh, man there is so much wrong with pretty much everything you said. Don't you still live with your parents though?

relevance please?

 

[chickpea]

relevance please?

Idk, I consider moving out of your parents' house a pretty crucial step towards adulthood.

 

[Elfboy]

I think the opinion of a 22-year old gay man on what constitutes the "vast majority" of a woman's sexual prime can safely be ignored.
But since I'm bad at ignoring nonsense.....yeah, you're not just wrong, you're so wrong that it's both slightly amusing and slightly offensive. Even 25 year olds aren't in their prime yet, male or female.

whether or not my comment offended you is inconsequential. what is consequential is I've talked to numerous gay and straight men about this topic (straight men are more likely to be honest with another man than a woman) and listened to the opinions of plastic surgeons, two of which is in the following clip from 13:40-15:15 (I recommend the entire documentary. it's fascinating)

You have so much to learn once you grow out of hitting on teenyboppers.

well, that's not happening any time soon

 

[Elfboy]

Idk, I consider moving out of your parents' house a pretty crucial step towards adulthood.

in a sense, you're kinda right (though my view on this matter is a bit ethnocentric. in plenty of countries, living with one's family unit into the 30s is commonplace). in another sense, it's possible to have a functioning adult brain and make rational decisions while living with your parents. I'm making one such decision by staying with them for the moment. sure, it bites my ego (more than) a little bit, but it's worth the safety and tolerable food (living off ramen, cereal and pizza is certainly something that would take time to adjust to). I have enough to move out, but, while independence is a key facet of maturity, so it being willing to temporarily swallow your ego to do what's really in your best interest.

 

[Lark]

I read a great quote once you know that said some people are dead at 25 and not buried until they are 75.

Mind you it must date from a time when people werent just mature by 25 but experienced the mid life crisis and disillusionment.

 

[RaptorWizard]

Have you even had a job?

By official standards, yes indeed, I have had a job - at as early as age 13; I was a referee for soccer games.

I also do lots of traditional chores around my house, and I can kind of get my thoughts in the zone while performing them.

My dad does mechanical work, and I help out with that too.

And I'm also attending college right now.

So I have a fairly clear grasp of what it takes to be a family-dependent adult.

As for my real thoughts on maturity, I think it takes away our tendency to question things and be a rebel.

Just passively going with the flow and accepting the system will drag us down by its own weakness.

Lastly, it's worth noting that I have faith in my abilities to heal the world and be a guiding light for the human race to our ultimate salvation!

 

[TheStarchDefenders]

Lastly, it's worth noting that I have faith in my abilities to heal the world and be a guiding light for the human race to our ultimate salvation!

So, being treated as an adult is tough for ya. What might ^that be?

 

[RaptorWizard]

So, being treated as an adult is tough for ya. What might ^that be?

Bury your ideas in a vault for a thousand years to await the unfolding of human consciousness to comprehend your vision.

 

[Usehername]

[video=]http://www.ted.com/talks/meg_jay_why_30_is_not_the_new_20.html[/video]

*does anyone know how to embed TED talks? I can only figure out how to embed YouTube videos.

 

[TheStarchDefenders]

Bury your ideas in a vault for a thousand years to await the unfolding of human consciousness to comprehend your vision.

I like what you did there. Answered my question and spouted all of that....uhhh...whatever that crap was.

 

[skylights]

[video=]http://www.ted.com/talks/meg_jay_why_30_is_not_the_new_20.html[/video]

*does anyone know how to embed TED talks? I can only figure out how to embed YouTube videos.

I listened to that a while ago and liked it, and was surprised by some of the backlash in the comments. It seemed to me her overall point was "embrace time instead of waiting for it to pass, even if you're not doing exactly what you thought you might be". I didn't see it as a particularly threatening "hurry up and go" but more of a "don't feel like you have to wait this one out".

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

I read a great quote once you know that said some people are dead at 25 and not buried until they are 75.

Why do we think it is better to be an eternal child than an adult? When and why did becoming an adult be such a horrible thing? Because we have to have jobs? But when we were kids, we had school. It's the same thing!

EDIT: I see we are actually in agreement, and that we believe that having fun and doing things you like and adulthood aren't mutually exclusive. It's not like you could do whatever you wanted when you were a kid either. I found I had more obstacles, actually. It's a good enough statement above, though, so I'm keeping it up.

 

[kiddykat]

How about technology and its impact on childhood experiences?

Seems like the advent of technology has pushed kids to cramming in their study materials even more so that there's more to learn and less time for play. (Maybe from where I'm from bc all kids are now required to have access to i-pads in class)

I think technology can rob a kid's childhood away, therefore, crippling them in adolescence, which also adds to quarterlife crisis.

Kids need to be out, roll in mud, play with their friends, fight, laugh, hug, blow bubbles, play in their own worlds of imagination.. technology should be the last thing they touch so they can have healthier patterns of social interaction and behavior- not from a machine or behind a screen but actual real "live" people in person. They need to feel that connection!

I feel sorry for the younger generations, as mine was probably the last to truly enjoy childhood as stated above..

 

[Jaq]

You'll always being considered a kid by those older than you. At least until you're in a rocking chair somewhere. (If you make it that far into life.)

So I don't see how any definition outside of a legal one matters.

 

[Lark]

Why do we think it is better to be an eternal child than an adult? When and why did becoming an adult be such a horrible thing? Because we have to have jobs? But when we were kids, we had school. It's the same thing!

EDIT: I see we are actually in agreement, and that we believe that having fun and doing things you like and adulthood aren't mutually exclusive. It's not like you could do whatever you wanted when you were a kid either. I found I had more obstacles, actually. It's a good enough statement above, though, so I'm keeping it up.

To begin with I thought school's not like work but on second thoughts I think you're pretty close to the mark actually. In the last two to three years the extent to which the in and out group phenomenons, popularity contests and adolescent social game playing is still a major, major factor in adult life and adult workplaces, including professionals credited with having more insight has really, really hit home with me. I never would have thought it would be the case.

When you're a kid you're actually much less likely to be alienated by work, or certain sorts of work, than when you are an adult, when I think about the amount of toys I possessed and games I played which were actually about what adults consider menial work or manual labour. Its still the same today, my grand parents would wonder why the hell people spend so long on farmville but have awful looking gardens or concrete over their lawns to save the hassel of keeping them.

I used to think for a while that people liked the carefree dependency of being younger but I dont ever remember enjoying that myself and then I thought perhaps its to do with becoming disilluioned, you can only have so many first time experiences before they are all done and you know that while driving, drinking alcohol, sex, earning a living and receiving a pay check can be fun or rewarding they arent anything near as fun or rewarding as the fantasy of the same thing which you and your friends believed in back in the day.

 

[Pseudo]

whether or not my comment offended you is inconsequential. what is consequential is I've talked to numerous gay and straight men about this topic (straight men are more likely to be honest with another man than a woman) and listened to the opinions of plastic surgeons, two of which is in the following clip from 13:40-15:15 (I recommend the entire documentary. it's fascinating)

well, that's not happening any time soon

All of this. Just. So. Ridiculous.


Maybe squeeze in talking to a woman somewhere in there. They might have a bit of info on their own sexual primes. Also what is the relevance of gay men to female sexuality?

Also if find you idea of honest amongst men ....silly.

 

[baccheion]

Development, or perceived maturity, is more type related than age related. Judgers, especially SJs, tend to strive for (or settle into) what's typically seen as maturity, whereas perceivers (especially TPs) don't, and tend to be seen as "immature" for longer.

What the article is saying aside, "you don't shave and you say what's on your mind, so you're immature" is that talk.

If we could actually talk about cognitive development versus all the traditional BS, then we could see what maturity is for a certain type of person. For some people, becoming what is traditionally seen as mature is actually a massive failure in their life (they've lost who they are in favor of being some other type of person) and it has come as a result of constant nagging (and worse) to grow up and to conform to the standard of what it means to be grown.

There is something about the prefrontal cortex not completely developing until someone is around 25, so maybe there is something there.

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

I used to think for a while that people liked the carefree dependency of being younger but I dont ever remember enjoying that myself and then I thought perhaps its to do with becoming disilluioned, you can only have so many first time experiences before they are all done and you know that while driving, drinking alcohol, sex, earning a living and receiving a pay check can be fun or rewarding they arent anything near as fun or rewarding as the fantasy of the same thing which you and your friends believed in back in the day.

I think a lot of people do like that carefree dependency, though. Why, I can't fathom. People often express how much they miss childhood because it was "simpler".