To answer the OP, yes I think I'm fat for me. I became interested in my diet when I was eleven. I was actually a very small child, slender and extremely active, and small boned compared to some of my peers, so I'm not sure where this idea came from. When I hit puberty at 13, I was convinced I was a whale, at all of 105 pounds.
I used to hate that I was so large-breasted and broad shouldered. I have long legs for a short girl, but generally I'm an apple-shaped woman, and that's not the shape typically hyped up in fashion magazines. I realized at 13 I would never be 5'11" and have a visible collar bone (seriously, I don't know what the collar bone thing was about?)
I used to hate my arms in high school and refused to wear tank tops, though I look at pictures of myself in high school and I wasn't overweight at all.
I obviously developed more body confidence by 18 when I became an exotic dancer. In fact, in high school my senior year I was voted "most likely to pose for Playboy" in the underground newspaper along with another girl. I never lacked for dates. STILL...despite all this, I was always vexed by how short and apple shaped I am.
Everyone wants to be what they aren't. I have a lot more body confidence now that I'm older, but I don't think I'm in my ideal shape at the moment, I could lose a few pounds, even though apparently even a 19 year old athlete thinks I'm sexy and attractive. No amount of validation will erase my self-perception.
I even get upset when I'm thinner and someone tells me I have no ass. Because my ass disappears when I'm a little thinner.
I'm not like one of those women who has had a chronic eating disorder or anything, but liking my body is a thing that comes and goes. I can feel like I'm totally hot and sexy (clearly I'm pretty confident about my body if I'll show it off the way I have in the past)...but other times I feel like an absolute COW.