[Type 7] Having doubts about my enneatype again =(

[Speed Gavroche]

I always act like if the person who aske for being typed is consisten, but I think too that Uwace could be true. Sad.

 

[Elfboy]

The only reason I think you are unhealthy is because you are endlessly struggling to discover your enneatype. You seem lost, a quality I doubt would exist in a high-functioning type. As I said, I relate to dom and aux fi-users of any type, and to withdrawn types. As far as 1 goes , when I read the riso hudson wisdom of the enneagram description it resonated strongly. 1w9 especially. So I doubt that's it.

My guess is you're not a ixfp or a xxfp. Similarly, my guess is you're not a 4 or 5. I would not rule out 9, just cause there can be a wide variety of mbti types that are 9. But if you are, I doubt you're a sp/sx, maybe sp/so or so/sp. 3 or 6 seems more likely to me.

I'd like to think I'm a four, but I put others needs before my own too much. I lose myself, forget what's important, go with the flow too much, and in general, am just too silent about my needs and wants. My major problem is my lack of inertia, wasting my time on stupid ocd bad habits like this website. I would do better to emulate the four more, in all honesty. But I'm scared to be honest.

struggling to see one's enneatype is often a sign that they're healthy. when you're unhealthy, your negative traits become extremely obvious. when you're healthy, your ego is kept more in check and harder to recognize. for the record, my major habitual problem is the same, lack of inertia and requiring lots of energy to do any kind of work. unlike you though, my problem is not fear driven. as for the instinct variant, I have no idea how you could think so/sp

 

[Elfboy]

rather than respond to each of the baseless "Elfboy is immature, unhealthy and pretending to be something he's not" responses, I'm going to respond to them collectively and save some time. Everything I've posted on this forum is the real me. my personality is multifaceted and has more sides to it than a dodecahedron, but each of those sides is real. I don't "change my personality type" or pretend to be stronger than I am (I do put my strongest foot in certain situations, but it's always real strength and confidence). if you have sound, logical reasons for thinking I am such, you're encouraged to express them, but being written off as such with no evidence repeatedly is more than a little annoying.
PS: good grief. at this rate, people are going to be saying I'm an ESFJ 2w3 so/sp in crazy 8 stress mode lol

 

[Kierva]

Maybe you're just an 8w9 with a 9 fast wing, I'm just browsing through the first few pages of the thread. Collective opinion states 7w8 or 8w9, so it would make sense that you could have fast 9 wing.

Will edit more.

Edit: This is my opinion and as such you may choose to discredit it. I'm seeing a lot of identification and that would be characteristic of 3s. Unfortunately PerN is down -- they have this great article on how to find your enneagram.

That being said I do remember having, or rather, making a thread of which I was "holding" onto a type and "made myself" into it, which is identification, as well as the type 3 behavior. My point is different types are similar, so it is important to find your main motivation. I was confused between 3w2 and 8w9 -- initially they typed me 3w2 because of the way I am at class but once it got down to the essence of why I was being that way, it was because I wanted to prove my strength, to people, to my mother, especially -- that I'm not a dumb failure.

Your confusion with 8 and 1 would be rather difficult I presume because of the core emotions being the same so I suggest you take a look at your *recent* behavior. The past does not exist, because as a kid you may have gone through traumatizing experiences which could alter your personality.

There are Helen Palmer tapes posted by Limit so I hope that these may be of help to your self-discovery.

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=EUIG09A4

PS: you remind me of myself back in PerN where I was notorious for changing my type like clothes. I'm not implying you do, it's just that yeah I know the "pain" of not being able to know your true type is because you're just not convinced. It would be of great help if we could read Jung's Psychological Types or even Don and Riso's book so that we can be enlightened. For now the basis of my typing is what seems to be closest to me, but I'm just not convinced yet.

 

[Mal12345]

i really have a hard time picturing an infp 1w9 slapping a girl and calling her a whore but what do i know

Elf said he punched her in the mouth. But 1w9 Ayn Rand bitch-slapped her lover Nathaniel Branden when she broke off their relationship.

 

[Elfboy]

They don't contain anger for ever until they see a right reason to express it, then they express it.

that's actually kinda what I was thinking about when I slapped her. basically, what went through my mind was unconsciously was "okay, I can hit her, but I'm only going to punch her in the face once. if not, I would just want to take out all my anger and frustration on her because I have this temptation to want to beat up women because it would make me feel better short term" fortunately my NFP powers were still working in the background or I pretty much would have become a wife beater without the wife.
PS: I'm happy to say this side of me is 100% gone now, I was VVVVERY unhealthy at this point in my life

 

[Mal12345]

obviously not all people of a certain type are going to be the same, but if they aren't similar and there aren't certain patterns and mannerisms that they can relate to, what's the point of having the systems at all. i feel like he's either not nearly as aggressive as he paints himself out to be, and is just creating some weird fantasy self, in which case i guess infp 1w9 could work. but if that's really how he acts irl, there's no way in hell he's either. the point is that none of us actually know what he's like, and he can make like 10 more enneagram type threads but it's not going to get him anywhere because he creates a different persona for everyone he makes, and there's no way of telling over an internet forum which is real and which is bullshit. you can call it "multi-faceted," but if you've seriously considered like every single enneagram type and haven't been able to narrow it down to 1 or 2 or even 3, it's probably not for you and never will be.

The part about creating 10 threads would be typical in these cases. And Sixes draw on many different kinds of internal resources as potentials to create whatever they need in this or that environment. But they also maintain an inner value-system as a core belief.

But what you don't seem to realize is that his difficulty at pinning down a type points to 3-6-9, and Sixes have the greatest difficulty of all the types. If he was an 8 or a 1 there would be no doubt. The very capacity for self-doubt points to Six. The very reason for creating this thread implies a Six. Being unable to narrow it down to 1 or 2 or 3 types implies that he's a Six.

I don't know if he needs more introspection, but I do know he needs to read more about the Enneagram, and not just the sketchy online crap. The real information is in books.

 

[Elfboy]

That would be typical in these cases. And Sixes draw on many different kinds of internal resources as potentials to create whatever they need in this or that environment. But they also maintain an inner value-system as a core belief.

But what you don't seem to realize is that his difficulty at pinning down a type points to 3-6-9, and Sixes have the greatest difficulty of all the types. If he was an 8 or a 1 there would be no doubt. The very capacity for self-doubt points to Six. The very reason for creating this thread implies a Six. Being unable to narrow it down to 1 or 2 or 3 types implies that he's a Six.

I don't know if he needs more introspection, but I do know he needs to read more about the Enneagram, and not just the sketchy online crap. The real information is in books.

I wouldn't say self doubting as much as "self skeptical" (less fear/insecurity driven) but this could point to 6 (as well as 5 or 4)

 

[Asterion]

The only way you're going to get to your type elfboy is by stepping back and disengaging from it, as many have already mentioned. It really doesn't seem to me (and others here) that you have a clear understanding of yourself, and that can take a long time develop. It can take years to create a complete understanding of the Enneagram and how it connects to reality, so many types overlap and manifest in different ways.

 

[Mal12345]

that's actually kinda what I was thinking about when I slapped her. basically, what went through my mind was unconsciously was "okay, I can hit her, but I'm only going to punch her in the face once. if not, I would just want to take out all my anger and frustration on her because I have this temptation to want to beat up women because it would make me feel better short term" fortunately my NFP powers were still working in the background or I pretty much would have become a wife beater without the wife.
PS: I'm happy to say this side of me is 100% gone now, I was VVVVERY unhealthy at this point in my life

The question I've been pondering was not how you felt before you hit her, but how you felt right afterward. And then, how you feel about it years later. I'm referring to your Fi feelings about values which you say were "still working in the background," assuming Fi.

 

[Elfboy]

Maybe you're just an 8w9 with a 9 fast wing, I'm just browsing through the first few pages of the thread. Collective opinion states 7w8 or 8w9, so it would make sense that you could have fast 9 wing.

Will edit more.

Edit: This is my opinion and as such you may choose to discredit it. I'm seeing a lot of identification and that would be characteristic of 3s. Unfortunately PerN is down -- they have this great article on how to find your enneagram.

That being said I do remember having, or rather, making a thread of which I was "holding" onto a type and "made myself" into it, which is identification, as well as the type 3 behavior. My point is different types are similar, so it is important to find your main motivation. I was confused between 3w2 and 8w9 -- initially they typed me 3w2 because of the way I am at class but once it got down to the essence of why I was being that way, it was because I wanted to prove my strength, to people, to my mother, especially -- that I'm not a dumb failure.
Your confusion with 8 and 1 would be rather difficult I presume because of the core emotions being the same so I suggest you take a look at your *recent* behavior. The past does not exist, because as a kid you may have gone through traumatizing experiences which could alter your personality.

There are Helen Palmer tapes posted by Limit so I hope that these may be of help to your self-discovery.

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=EUIG09A4

PS: you remind me of myself back in PerN where I was notorious for changing my type like clothes. I'm not implying you do, it's just that yeah I know the "pain" of not being able to know your true type is because you're just not convinced. It would be of great help if we could read Jung's Psychological Types or even Don and Riso's book so that we can be enlightened. For now the basis of my typing is what seems to be closest to me, but I'm just not convinced yet.

that's precisely the same reason why I'm pretty confident I'm not a 3. I have tons of three-ish behaviors (enjoying dressing professionally, ambitious, entrepreneural, enjoy high status activities) but my motivations are the polar opposite. I can't maintain appearences for more than an hour before I have to go hide in the bathroom the rest of the night and recoup myself

 

[Elfboy]

The question I've been pondering was not how you felt before you hit her, but how you felt right afterward. And then, how you feel about it years later. I'm referring to your Fi feelings about values which you say were "still working in the background," assuming Fi.

Fi/Ne gave me the intrapersonal intelligence to know that wanting to punch her was more because i wanted to physically vent than because I thought what she was doing was evil. I was rationalizing my anger by saying that she deserved all the physical punishment I could give her but Fi was like "nigga please".
nowadays though, I probably be like "eww! you whore" in a non chalant sort of way and smirk/chuckle to myself once she'd walked by

 

[Mal12345]

I wouldn't say self doubting as much as "self skeptical" (less fear/insecurity driven) but this could point to 6 (as well as 5 or 4)

I agree you're not driven by fear as that is a lower-level aspect of your type. But your ENTJ shell is a counterphobic response to internal stresses which were invoked by external conflicts that you neither asked for nor wanted. The motives which drive you, as described in your bio, are not external but primarily internal.

 

[Elfboy]

The only way you're going to get to your type elfboy is by stepping back and disengaging from it, as many have already mentioned. It really doesn't seem to me (and others here) that you have a clear understanding of yourself, and that can take a long time develop. It can take years to create a complete understanding of the Enneagram and how it connects to reality, so many types overlap and manifest in different ways.

I understand all the parts of myself, my motivations, my ambitions, my fears; I just don't know which one's are less/more prevelant. I'm not a very fearful person to begin with (although I'm aware enneagram is more complicated than that) and ever since I learned that it was possible to become rich, my philosophy has been "why choose? I want everything. I just need to figure out how to get it." essentially it boils down to my greatest desire is to do what I want and my biggest fear is not doing what I want or someone preventing me from doing what I want (of course, this doesn't help enneagram typing me does it lol)

 

[Mal12345]

Fi/Ne gave me the intrapersonal intelligence to know that wanting to punch her was more because i wanted to physically vent than because I thought what she was doing was evil. I was rationalizing my anger by saying that she deserved all the physical punishment I could give her but Fi was like "nigga please".
nowadays though, I probably be like "eww! you whore" in a non chalant sort of way and smirk/chuckle to myself once she'd walked by

That last part describes the very essence of the type 6 behavior pattern. It could be a smirk, or a derisive chuckle, or something like that, but it's always the same wordless negative kind of value-judgment. It is a projection of how you feel about yourself. To say you were venting off anger is just the tip of the iceberg.

The first paragraph describes the valuing, morally self-controlled side of the Six.

 

[Elfboy]

That last part describes the very essence of the type 6 behavior pattern. It could be a smirk, or a derisive chuckle, or something like that, but it's always the same wordless negative kind of value-judgment. It is a projection of how you feel about yourself. To say you were venting off anger is just the tip of the iceberg.

The first paragraph describes the valuing, morally self-controlled side of the Six.

it sounds like the main problem of type 6 is mostly "whoa! I'm completely off balance and confused! what do I do?! "

 

[Mal12345]

I understand all the parts of myself, my motivations, my ambitions, my fears; I just don't know which one's are less/more prevelant. I'm not a very fearful person to begin with (although I'm aware enneagram is more complicated than that) and ever since I learned that it was possible to become rich, my philosophy has been "why choose? I want everything. I just need to figure out how to get it." essentially it boils down to my greatest desire is to do what I want and my biggest fear is not doing what I want or someone preventing me from doing what I want (of course, this doesn't help enneagram typing me does it lol)

Riso related this similarity between the 8 and 6:

"Although we have mentioned the counterphobic approach to the Six, the Eight really represents the counterphobic approach to life par excellence."

 

[Mal12345]

it sounds like the main problem of type 6 is mostly "whoa! I'm completely off balance and confused! what do I do?! "

At one level yes, at another level no. Your super-ego, which basically spoke to you in time to prevent further violence, is more helpful than confusing. But that's not to say 8s don't have a super-ego to prevent their aggressions from running amok.

 

[Viridian]

Let's try a different approach, Elfboy: over the past few years, what kind of personal demons did you have to overcome, pervasive habits and cycles that you have to make an effort to curb?

 

[skylights]

it sounds like the main problem of type 6 is mostly "whoa! I'm completely off balance and confused! what do I do?! "

yeah kinda. for me it's like, there's so much information and so many different ideas and possibilities. i know how i'd like to feel, but i don't always know how to get that. when i don't feel the way i want, i'm worried about how to get there, and when i do feel the way i want, i'm worried about hanging onto that feeling. it's easy when i'm sheltered and when i know all the rules, because i understand the system, but it's hard in the big world where things are so often subtle and concealed. how can i anchor myself so i know where i'm coming from and where i'm going, and so that i don't have to worry all the time?

when i finally let go - move to 9, i guess - it's a wonderful feeling. i don't have to try to meta-think all the time. it's like when you're on a really intense rollercoaster and you're tense at first but then you just let go and let the forces pass through your body, and you flow along with them instead of resisting. it's like becoming one with the world.