briochick
half-nut member
- Joined
- Dec 14, 2008
- Messages
- 633
- MBTI Type
- eNFP
- Enneagram
- ;)
- Instinctual Variant
- sx
I've noticed that the more I've come to understand my own personality the more I can recognize similarities in other people. I can see like-kind often in similar ideas about life, or feelings about home and making goals, and majors. I met a soft spoken guy in his late 20's who was talking about (but hadn't yet) getting his graduate degree. He'd had a very similar major in college and also taught esl abroad. He was pretty self-effacing. I could see like-kind. Some of my proudest and worst qualities reflected back.
Here's the thing though, I often don't get along with like-kind nearly as well as you'd think I would. I find that I match with INFJs in conversations, and INTJs. They consider me a bit flaky but otherwise we have fun. I GET other INFPs but I'm usually absurdly disappointed in them. Like; so much skill just sitting there. It is a very similar sentiment that I feel about myself.
Then there are others who I get but I'm offended by. A particular ENFJ comes to mind.
Others I can have basic conversations with but it must be limited to very superficial things or offense is taken on both sides, like with my ESFP sister or an ESFP friend of mine.
There are ones I don't get, and who sometimes annoy me, but I need, and with whom there is a mutual appreciation, xSFJs are generally this case.
People are much more complicated than a simple cognative functions system. Much more. My father and I are both Idealists but he approaches the world as something to conquer or protect yourself from, I approach it as something to be cautious with and seek to understand, his anger directs outwards, mine inwards. He believes that morality changes on a day to day basis, I don't.
My sister and my brother are both Artisans but they approach life very differently as well. Thinking similarities, but attitude differences.
In addition I've been studying a bit of enneagram, which I think explains the attitudes better.
Anyway, it's been nice, nice to let go of rigid ideas and use them as general guidelines to understand people, to begin to get at their motivations, to understand myself and what I can connect to, what I can only appreciate, and what I can't stand. I find that it's not necessarily personality, but the person.
What about you?
Here's the thing though, I often don't get along with like-kind nearly as well as you'd think I would. I find that I match with INFJs in conversations, and INTJs. They consider me a bit flaky but otherwise we have fun. I GET other INFPs but I'm usually absurdly disappointed in them. Like; so much skill just sitting there. It is a very similar sentiment that I feel about myself.
Then there are others who I get but I'm offended by. A particular ENFJ comes to mind.
Others I can have basic conversations with but it must be limited to very superficial things or offense is taken on both sides, like with my ESFP sister or an ESFP friend of mine.
There are ones I don't get, and who sometimes annoy me, but I need, and with whom there is a mutual appreciation, xSFJs are generally this case.
People are much more complicated than a simple cognative functions system. Much more. My father and I are both Idealists but he approaches the world as something to conquer or protect yourself from, I approach it as something to be cautious with and seek to understand, his anger directs outwards, mine inwards. He believes that morality changes on a day to day basis, I don't.
My sister and my brother are both Artisans but they approach life very differently as well. Thinking similarities, but attitude differences.
In addition I've been studying a bit of enneagram, which I think explains the attitudes better.
Anyway, it's been nice, nice to let go of rigid ideas and use them as general guidelines to understand people, to begin to get at their motivations, to understand myself and what I can connect to, what I can only appreciate, and what I can't stand. I find that it's not necessarily personality, but the person.
What about you?