Halla74
Artisan Conquerer
- Joined
- Jan 20, 2009
- Messages
- 6,898
- MBTI Type
- ESTP
- Enneagram
- 7w8
- Instinctual Variant
- sx/so
Here's a perspective from an ESTP, 7w8.
I've always been an aloof, objective, tactical, problem-solver.
Somehow my purpose in life is to figure out how to make things happen.
Emotions are not a primary skill set for such a life, and I really didn't have to deal with them until about two years ago, at the tender age of 34.
Why did I have to develop my tertiary function, Fe? Because I was in a really difficult part of my life, and I was unable to make decisions as to how to resolve things, and move on.
I'm going to say that again.
Me, an ESTP, was unable to make DECISIONS.
Why?
Well, as it turns out, not all decisions can be solved in a spreadsheet, or with on the fly analytical problem solving skills. There are some MAJOR decisions in life, and of course many EVERYDAY decisions too that require each of us to decide how we FEEL about something.
Well, how about that? If you don't have a well developed set of feelings, you can be stopped in your tracks. I would have NEVER guessed that a possibility if it had not happened to me first hand. I actually went into a major depression over this, as I have never been unable to make things happen, or been unable to decide my destiny in real time. That really screwed my head up.
So. What did I do?
I layed by the pool and thought. And thought. And thought some more. And that didn't help. Then I layed by the pool some more and tried to FEEL. I asked myself some silly questions: (1) How do I feel right now? (2) Why do I feel this way? (3) What does it mean? (4) What am I going to do about it?
After about a month of asking myself these things several times per day, my feelings began to come alive. It was freaking WEIRD. But it got me through my issues. It let me solve my problems. It allowed me to find a way through things, and ultimately I got better very quickly.
Now, almost two years later, I have a fairly well developed set of feelings. i am able to make decisions better than ever before, and in many cases even faster than before. I am no longer ignorant of the fact that making decisions with my feelings does not put me at risk for being irrational. My thiniing skill set is always on over drive, but now that I have feelings to guide my thoughts, I am able to get to the real information needed to solve problems, instead of being paralyzed by details that are bountiful in supply, but are not really at all important to me.
So, I'd like to take a moment to thank you wonderful Idyllics for using your feelings, and for showing the rest of us how to do it well. Please be patient with the Thinkers in your lives. We are not heartless assholes. We are trying to make ourselves useful by offering fool proof solutions to things that are valid under all circumstances. Us being "aloof" just means we are trying to be unbiased. We really do care. Our feelings can be hurt, and when they are it's pretty deep, but we tend to get over it quickly. We are not beyond hope. It just takes the right circumstances in our lives to compel us to develop something we are not naturally good at.
Peace to you all,
-Halla
I've always been an aloof, objective, tactical, problem-solver.
Somehow my purpose in life is to figure out how to make things happen.
Emotions are not a primary skill set for such a life, and I really didn't have to deal with them until about two years ago, at the tender age of 34.
Why did I have to develop my tertiary function, Fe? Because I was in a really difficult part of my life, and I was unable to make decisions as to how to resolve things, and move on.
I'm going to say that again.
Me, an ESTP, was unable to make DECISIONS.
Why?
Well, as it turns out, not all decisions can be solved in a spreadsheet, or with on the fly analytical problem solving skills. There are some MAJOR decisions in life, and of course many EVERYDAY decisions too that require each of us to decide how we FEEL about something.
Well, how about that? If you don't have a well developed set of feelings, you can be stopped in your tracks. I would have NEVER guessed that a possibility if it had not happened to me first hand. I actually went into a major depression over this, as I have never been unable to make things happen, or been unable to decide my destiny in real time. That really screwed my head up.
So. What did I do?
I layed by the pool and thought. And thought. And thought some more. And that didn't help. Then I layed by the pool some more and tried to FEEL. I asked myself some silly questions: (1) How do I feel right now? (2) Why do I feel this way? (3) What does it mean? (4) What am I going to do about it?
After about a month of asking myself these things several times per day, my feelings began to come alive. It was freaking WEIRD. But it got me through my issues. It let me solve my problems. It allowed me to find a way through things, and ultimately I got better very quickly.
Now, almost two years later, I have a fairly well developed set of feelings. i am able to make decisions better than ever before, and in many cases even faster than before. I am no longer ignorant of the fact that making decisions with my feelings does not put me at risk for being irrational. My thiniing skill set is always on over drive, but now that I have feelings to guide my thoughts, I am able to get to the real information needed to solve problems, instead of being paralyzed by details that are bountiful in supply, but are not really at all important to me.
So, I'd like to take a moment to thank you wonderful Idyllics for using your feelings, and for showing the rest of us how to do it well. Please be patient with the Thinkers in your lives. We are not heartless assholes. We are trying to make ourselves useful by offering fool proof solutions to things that are valid under all circumstances. Us being "aloof" just means we are trying to be unbiased. We really do care. Our feelings can be hurt, and when they are it's pretty deep, but we tend to get over it quickly. We are not beyond hope. It just takes the right circumstances in our lives to compel us to develop something we are not naturally good at.
Peace to you all,
-Halla