stringstheory
THIS bitch
- Joined
- Jul 12, 2009
- Messages
- 923
- MBTI Type
- ENFP
- Enneagram
- 1
I don't know if I agree with you about good vs bad drugs, AT. I lived on a reserve for several years where most people did drugs to cope with pain and depression and insecurity.
...
By medicating emotional pain even with weed (and honestly I don't know anyone taking weed that is not taking it for those reasons)
I just had to point this out, but maybe this is why?
i think I see what you are saying (that the issue is not necessarily the drug, it's WHY it is being used.) and I totally agree, but this is just me merging these two topics so I'm just sort of emotionally going off of what you wrote so
i really don't see why some drugs are "bad" when there are plenty of socially acceptable prescription drugs that have the same or similar effects. I see people using the word "numb" to describe how they feel with marijuana but it's interesting to me since I really find that marijuana does the same thing that my prescription mood stabilizers do. In fact, low doses of both work fantastically. Why one makes you "numb" and the other "stable" i don't understand. Especially since I sort of see mental illness as going both ways sometimes. Is it always something that's necessarily wrong with ME and my mind and my processes, or is it that the outside world that's all fucked up too? If so then well, no wonder it's hard to cope with sometimes!! I really resonated with what 21% posted earlier, it's just the pain of being.
I often feel the way the OP described; an overwhelming Fi. I've had similar experiences to all of the examples given in the OP. The worst for me is advertising, especially when I perceive it as really manipulating me emotionally and it get me to go back to a "place" i only truly experienced as a child. My roommate bought me a bottle of water the other day and the brand name was something like "Smiley Springs" or something like that and all these little smiley faces and children playing in a forest stream. I wasn't in a bad mood or anything, but I felt that to a certain degree I saw what they were trying to do and damnit, it was actually working. It got me very emotional and I didn't even know how to respond to that sort of emotion, and so I simply cried. A lot.
The problem I have is when such strong Fi is paralyzing. And it happens often. A recurring theme of discussion between me and my therapist is how utterly immobilized and defeated I feel knowing that there is literally no alternative to living in a world that, on a grand scale, has such utter disregard for my values and the values of many, many others. I can't just hop onto a ship to another planet where I feel more at home...this is it. My only option is to cope. So what I hold out for is when these same strong emotions are inspiring or energizing..like the ones that make me want to make a career out of assisting others. The way I try to see it is that the pain is just waiting to be focused into energy, constructive or destructive.