What is the value in making mistakes in life's journey?
I don't know anymore. I used to think it was an important part of living life, an inevitable side effect of actions taken in a world so much bigger than me with nuances no one can fully understand. But now? I dunno. Maybe it's just something we tell ourselves to make us feel better about all the ways we fuck up. Ourselves, others, we come into this world, grow up in it, and see it get a little more rough for wear, nostalgia is a lie that we're brought up to believe in, so does anyone really learn anything or do we all just pick something that makes our brain scream less and say: Sure. It's important that happened because...I dont know...
Do you learn from your mistakes?
Some of them. I dont stick pennies in light sockets. I dont try to breathe under water. But then again, other things? No. I dont learn from all my mistakes, I still sometimes cling to this absurd notion that there's somehow a way things should be. That people are less shitty than everything you hear in the news makes it out to be, that people are more than a hairs breath from tearing each other to shreds... That there's some sort of value inherent in mercy. The silly stupid things that matter to people, do matter because
someone cares about them. That there's hope of fixing things in my life that are broken. That when you take a hit, you get up and get back into the fight. I still hold out hope. That I'm not just a slow poison. So I learn from some and not others.
Describe the process on how you learn best from important life lessons.
I don't understand the question and I'm feeling honest enough to not try to pretend that I understand how to answer it let alone how to do it in life. If I have a process it's reflexive not cognizant as far as I know.
Are you afraid of making a mistake or are you bold and experiment by taking chances?
Of course I'm afraid of making mistakes. I grew up in an environment where mistakes didn't exist. Every action had one of two outcomes either it was perfect and every thing was fine. Or it wasn't and there was no excuse. So I learned to fear mistakes. But it's never stopped me from making them. At a certain point you realize. If I'm fucked no matter what I do, I might as well do something that seems like a good idea at the time. I don't really know how to ease into things irl so I just sort of throw myself into life, because I grew up seeing what happens to people who don't. There are no certainties in life, safety and security are a lie as far as I can tell. There are no certainties in life apart from the one that says one day you're numbers up. So I might as well try to look on the bright side of life...