Keirsey, in PUMII, in his paragraphs describing Healers [INFP], says the following:
"Healers find it difficult to believe in themselves and to trust themselves. Deeply committed to the positive and the good, yet taught to believe there is evil in them, they can come to develop a certain fascination with the problem of good and evil, sacred and profane. They are drawn toward purity, but can become engrossed with sin, continuously on the lookout for the wickedness that lurks within them. Then, when they believe they have yielded to an impure temptation, they may be given to acts of self-sacrifice in atonement. Others seldom detect this inner turmoil, however, for the struggle between good and evil is within the INFP, who does not feel compelled to make the issue public."
a little further, about mating, conveying the same idea:
"INFPs cling to their dreams, and often find it difficult to reconcile a romantic, idealized concept of conjugal life with the realities of everyday living with another person. Even at the best of times, they seem fearful of too much marital bliss, afraid that current happiness may have to be paid for with later sacrifices. The devil is sure to get his due if one experiences too freely of happiness, or, for that matter, of success, or beauty, or wealth, or knowledge."
What do you think about these statements?
Are you tormented by this inner, private, Manichean conflict?
Is the image of the guardian angel popping over one shoulder and the inner-devil over the other appropriate?
After a break-up do you often feel like you deserve to suffer?
I agree with the first paragraph for myself, but not the second. I got married at 21 and I knew that there would be thorns with the roses and bumps along the way. I feel that I deserve to as much happiness as the next person and that any happiness I get from my marriage is reflective of what both me and my husband put into our marriage.
I never felt like I 'deserved' to suffer in break-ups.
Good vs. Evil is a frequent topic between my husband and I, but where he sees evil as something to be cut out, I see evil as something to be reformed and transformed into positive.