Spamtar
Ghost Monkey Soul
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2009
- Messages
- 4,468
- MBTI Type
- INTP
- Enneagram
- 5w4
Glad I found this forum. I'm INTP and I have never been out on a date. I'm very confidence. So I asked out many girls but 0% success. I went to parties. 0%. I tried different method, just tell them how i really felt. That didn't work either.
0% rate is really starting to bother me. I mean I been asking girls out for couple years now. I don't sound "desperate". I'm starting to wonder what's wrong with me. I'm a great guy to be with. I know I can be very quite and socially awaward.
This is how things goes mostly.
1. start a conversation (it can be anything depending on the situation).
2. small talk 5-10minutes usually but can be longer or shorter depending on situation
3. ask em out on a date if i want to get to know them little bit more.
4. usually they smile and give em their number
5. i call them 2 days later ( I wait two days cause i don't want to look desperate or anything)
6. phone is either off or they don't pick up. I leave a message and if they call then it's a date if they don't call than i forget about it cause i'm not gonna call them and leave bunch of messages.
7. If they do pick up, small talk for like a minute or two," how are you" or "remember me". than i say are you free friday night, they say no. than they say " I'll call you when I have free time" They never call.
Suprising I have never gotten a fake number. I even asked for a girls number I just met. I walked up to her and talked for like a minute and asked for her number. at first she was like WTF face but she gave me her number.
It sounds like you need to work on the "comfort" phase of attraction. In other words it seems there is the initial attraction to move into the comfort phase (deeper rapport) but you eject shortly afterwards.
Consider putting the phone number in your pocket and go beyond small talk to get and know the female better. If she has to split shortly after you get her number consider calling her back not to get "a date" rather build deeper rapport (caveat after a rapport established work on kino or other devices to build up her "buying temperature"/sexual attraction).