Lily flower
New member
- Joined
- Jun 28, 2010
- Messages
- 930
- MBTI Type
- INFJ
- Enneagram
- 2
I have an ENFJ friend who is incredibly charming. Wherever he goes, the men admire and follow him and the women act like they are besotted.
But when it comes to understanding people and their motivations, he seems completely clueless. He doesn't understand when people are trying to deceive him. If someone gets mad at him he just looks mystified. He doesn't seem to understand any of the complaints that are being made against him. Usually he just apologizes and pours on more charm, (which usually works).
My question is: How can someone who is so good at charming people be so bad at truly understanding people? It doesn't make any sense to me. Don't you need to understand people to charm them?
But when it comes to understanding people and their motivations, he seems completely clueless. He doesn't understand when people are trying to deceive him. If someone gets mad at him he just looks mystified. He doesn't seem to understand any of the complaints that are being made against him. Usually he just apologizes and pours on more charm, (which usually works).
My question is: How can someone who is so good at charming people be so bad at truly understanding people? It doesn't make any sense to me. Don't you need to understand people to charm them?