bluebreads
New member
- Joined
- Oct 10, 2008
- Messages
- 9
- MBTI Type
- INFP
- Enneagram
- 4
<<this is from an older post of mineI have this friend who I just adore...most of the time. But like all friends, we have our differences and well...we're not at all that great at communicating our feelings when we're angry or annoyed with each other...especially since the cold war we had last quarter...well actually, she was the one being frosty and I was just confused and hurt with her behavior towards me. In the end I confronted her about it and her reaction wasn't and isn't something I'm used too (My family consists of ENTJs, INTJs, ENTPs who are all pretty blunt when they're angry)...her face just contorted in a combination of anger and annoyance...ands she basically said that she wasn't angry with me and that it was something she wanted to resolve herself...but I just didn't believe it! I was the only person she was being cold to. She was treating everyone else normally...just not me. All I remember was that I ended up crying and eventually, she sullenly began to talk to me again...and well things resumed like normal for a time. But now...
So my ESFJ friend (or perhaps ex-friend) and I haven't spoken in weeks. We've had a history of communication problems starting with last year (I've made a post about this a while ago) and now things are worse than ever.
Every time I try talking to her, she completely shuts me down with one-worded answers, shrugs, or outright silence.
And just now I think I may have exacerbated the situation by trying to confront her head on about how awkward things have become between us. I wasn't mean or cruel or anything. If anything I was just as direct as I could be...and that's something very hard for me to do. I guess my presentation could have been better...the more I tried to explain to her, the more awkward and nervous I got...and the more she seemed increasingly annoyed. She threw a lot of long looks at me, sighed, and when she did answer...she said she really didn't know what to say to all this...and then we had this god awful small talk conversation which she ended my claiming that she wanted to go to sleep...and she's not. She's downstairs downstairs watching television with our other friend.
I feel like I just don't understand her at all anymore. I don't make friends easily and while dumping her as friend seems to have become an increasingly tempting option...most of our friends are mutual...plus when we were on good terms, I really felt like we had a connection. I miss that. And it pains me so much.
I honestly feel like she hates me right now. I wish I could have been more confident...but f$^#...
God...I'm such an unhappy, stressed out mess right now. I don't know what to do. please help!