It's a little more bleak than that. It's not the 'I got dumped a day ago, I need a girl's night out' sort of thing, it's more like she doesn't know if she'll be able to talk or swallow again after this surgery she's getting on her thyroid...she seems to be much more worried about the scarring though.
To go on what Whatever said, doing or saying something that says you really care about them is about the best thing. Unfortunately in a situation like this though it will definitely be tough to keep a smile on their face. Do try though, she will notice it and will appreciate it
For me personally, if I'm really depressed or something, someone who was constantly there for me and dotting on me would be incredibly sweet and endearing, though I imagine I'd push them away after while because I'd start to feel guilty about her investing so much time into me.
coconut said:
I know an ISFJ, and I'd like to know if this is something that's part of being an ISFJ . . .
In any discussion or topic, ISFJ relates it to self. Global warming becomes,"It was so hot that I just couldn't stay cool so I had to put on shorts and when I was little, we used to have really hot summers..."
National health care becomes, "I had to go to the emergency room two years ago and it took four hours, and they gave me this antibiotic, and it gave me hives, and I used to get hives when I was little..."
Child abuse becomes, "Once someone thought I was too harsh with my child and they told me so, and it hurt my feelings, and they shouldn't have hurt my feelings..."
No topic is too big, too general, or too global to be turned into an opportunity to talk about how this person felt about some personal incident with even the slightest relation to the topic at hand. And, no, this isn't a person who's selfish; this is a very nice person who would give anything to anyone to be helpful.
I like to talk about big picture generalities, and I get bored with trivialities; can I find some common ground with this ISFJ?
Hmm...I know that I tend to relate to a particular topic with personal acedotes (see my response above for an example) as I feel that it adds context to the discussion. However, I always try to stay on topic. Global Warming, for example, I would have to remain objective on as I have no personal experience on the matter but for other topics like religion or politics, THOSE I have some personal experience on and could relate that somehow.
Something you need to keep in mind with ISFJ's is that we are Si-doms, which means as we go through life and experience things we creatd databases in our heads about those experiences and when we encounter new or similar experiences, we compare it to what we've experienced and felt before.
As such, we tend to relate to things personally because we're comparing them to past personal experiences.
For example, ask me about politics and I'll tell you about how I've personally experienced the effects of certain policies or decisions made by government (As a property manager, I not only work in what is one of the most heavily regulated businesses, I have several tenants that receive some sort of assistance from the government).
As my about religion, and I'll relate it to my own experience from being a fundamentalist Lutheran to becoming an atheist (what I am right now).
For me, doing so puts the topic in the context of a real world situation which to me is a very practical thing to do as it makes it easier to understand (or so I think anyway, I'm sure others wouldn't feel the same way).