Damn, I had a perfect quote about INFP that would have totally answered your question instantly and without question, but I can't find it
Okay, so basically:
It's an Fi thing, and more importantly it's the relationship we as INFPs have with our feelings.
See, feelings are our currency. Our entire beings, our economy, is completely comprised of feelings that come in various sizes and values. Relationships are a HUGE deal. They're like... a multi-billion dollar contract, a merger between two corporations. Relationships are seriousness business, because we're talking massive amounts of currency being dealt with.
So, are you just gonna jump into a multi-billion dollar contract on a whim?
Hell no, that shit takes years to work out and craft and refine. How's the market looking? How's the other person seem? Am I gonna profit from it? And I probably need to watch the market trends to make sure that this investment is gonna be profitable for the entire foreseeable future, right?
That's how we see relationships.
We're constantly examining it and then making progress and stepping back to examine that progress. It's a huge fucking deal! We're meticulous about every little detail, so be prepared to see progress with your INFP, and then a period where they're double-checking all of the numbers to make sure the progress they've just made is stable.
Here's a quote that might help:
INFPs develop these insights through reflection, and they require substantial time alone to ponder and process new information.
Getting involved with an INFP is a patience game. We have to go over the feelings you're causing us, and it's really uncomfortable knowing that we're getting to close to someone like that. We're basically handing over our very beings to you, so we take a lot of time chewing it over and watching you, making sure you're the perfect person who will always keep us safe and won't hurt us.
Does that make sense?
So yeah, if you move to fast, it'll be a setback. It's not necessarily a deal-breaker though, unless you move so fast you can't undo it. It
is a dealbreaker if you move too fast and refuse to slow down, or if you refuse to let us set the pace.
And the patience game sort of serves as a general test, ya know? If you're still around waiting for us after we've finally reached the emotional confidence in the deal, then that's a huge thing to us. That shows you're in this for the long haul like we need you to be.
But, like I said, it takes a long time. I've heard of people chasing after INFPs for years, and it taking months to get to just kissing. Because relationships are about all of the other things, it's about sitting there and talking to you and being around you. It's not just the affection.
Just be careful, because our primary shadow function is Fe, so if an INFP is stressed they'll probably move faster than they're actually comfortable moving. Then when we're not stressed, we freak out that we did something we can't undo. It's like getting drunk and waking up, realizing you've had sex with your best friend.
So it's in your best interest to pay attention for that, because it's an unintentional INFP-caused setback, which can be frustrating since we're giving you the okay and then taking it back and being mad at you about it.
But that's the reason why.