CunningLinguist
New member
- Joined
- Nov 2, 2009
- Messages
- 15
- MBTI Type
- INFP
- Enneagram
- 4w3
Hi guys, INFP here, hoping to figure out what type I've gotten myself involved with. When you get so involved with someone I'm finding it's hard to objectively analyze them because you see elements of many types within them. Or maybe they're just crazy. Be warned, this is a long post. But hopefully detailed enough to make some speculations.
-Said he didn't want to do MBTI because he didn't want to be categorized or typed. Also stated "there's no such thing as introverts or extroverts, people are just 'verts".
-Web designer, gets unnerved when there are changes at work like last week when a guy he socializes with outside of work was moved into the position of being his boss due to company-wide restructuring. He always takes such things personally. He has a fear he's being pushed out/getting fired any day. Says that when people at work don't give him enough to do he's bored and feels useless. Then feels guilty because others seem fine sitting at a desk all day while he hates it. Claims that he deliberately tries to get attention by showing up to work later and later so that they will either a) fire him or b) confront him about it, when he tells them to give him more work. Once they give him more work he starts coming in on time or early. Has this extreme need to stay busy to avoid being bored but also has difficulty with a 9-5 structure, feels more awake late at night (as do I).
-Always working on side projects at home when not at work...either redesigns of his website or making a new comic book. Wants to make comic books for a living, is really into comics and sci-fi, huge Buffy fan, attends Dragon Con.
-Says he loves me because no one has understood what his life is like before in terms of emotions. He seems to be very emotionally moody...or at least more externally emotionally moody than I, because I find myself relating but find it odd that he outwardly expresses angst. He says he's honest with me because he has nothing to gain from lying. Also, the moodiness all seems to be tied to deep fear of failure. He told me before he was 25 he was always "oh things will work out somehow, I can't fail because I'm me". Then he didn't get a job he wanted and a relationship didn't work out and now he says he has constant fear of screwing things up somehow.
-When not working spends free time with his family. States that he won't move while his grandparents are still alive. Makes the family calendar every year, is into family genealogy. Says his feelings are hurt when people discount what's important to him-being with his family. Wants me to attend every football tailgate, family gathering, anything family-related. I find this exhausting sometimes. The thing is, he does at times too but he always goes anyway. Is generally the family member who drives people places or fixes stuff for them. Also tends to gossip a lot around his family. Also enjoys saying mean/innappropriate things around his mother for entertainment because they always shock her. She seems very SFJ, and was disappointed in him for his Halloween costume (priest robe w/Norwegian death metal makeup) when he went as Judas Priest.
-Says people accuse him of lacking morals because he acts however he wants but that he does have them-he has his own created internal value system.
-Says he views sex and romance as separate, the romance is laying around talking, saying 'I love you' (which he wants to do way more than me-he said it first, just randomly blurted it out one day), cuddling, spending time together but sex is done because it feels good. He describes me as wonderful and perfect with unnerving frequency. Again, it feels weird to me to be outwardly expressive of such things. And after he asked and I told him I loved him back he checked again a couple weeks later, and has done so. He seems to need reassurance that I haven't run away yet.
-Is very into his appearance in that he always wants to straighten his hair, moisturizes, scolds himself if he eats too much (seems afraid of being fat). Asked me one day if I thought he was gay when we met, I said no but that my roommate had. Claims people often mistake him as that. His voice isn't the deepest, he gets really excited and uses hand gestures in conversation, he seems to be uncaring about using traditionally female words like 'slut' to describe himself, likes to joke about wearing pink or painting his nails (black only). His mother says he's the daughter she never had.
-Within a couple minutes of meeting an ENTJ that I know he asked me why we don't hang out with her more. He seemed to become more energized around her. Also another male friend of mine, who is either ENTJ or ENFJ seemed to make him more talkative. He's about as quiet as I am in social interactions unless a topic of interest comes up. My INTP and INFP friends really like him and always want to hang out. He seems to really like them too. But he's very good about being willing to meet everybody, he seems very aware of being nice to who he's "supposed" to be nice to. He also seems to really like my mom, she's an ISTJ. A couple times I've complained about things she does that I find annoying and he sides with her, saying something like "that's how a mother should be". In terms of friends, he seems to have many acquaintances (just like me) but only a couple actual friendships that he maintains longer than the duration of social activity (like working in the same place). The friends that he has maintained the longest are all girls from high school and he's always had difficulty making male friends outside of work.
Okay, if you've made it down here congrats! Type away!
-Said he didn't want to do MBTI because he didn't want to be categorized or typed. Also stated "there's no such thing as introverts or extroverts, people are just 'verts".
-Web designer, gets unnerved when there are changes at work like last week when a guy he socializes with outside of work was moved into the position of being his boss due to company-wide restructuring. He always takes such things personally. He has a fear he's being pushed out/getting fired any day. Says that when people at work don't give him enough to do he's bored and feels useless. Then feels guilty because others seem fine sitting at a desk all day while he hates it. Claims that he deliberately tries to get attention by showing up to work later and later so that they will either a) fire him or b) confront him about it, when he tells them to give him more work. Once they give him more work he starts coming in on time or early. Has this extreme need to stay busy to avoid being bored but also has difficulty with a 9-5 structure, feels more awake late at night (as do I).
-Always working on side projects at home when not at work...either redesigns of his website or making a new comic book. Wants to make comic books for a living, is really into comics and sci-fi, huge Buffy fan, attends Dragon Con.
-Says he loves me because no one has understood what his life is like before in terms of emotions. He seems to be very emotionally moody...or at least more externally emotionally moody than I, because I find myself relating but find it odd that he outwardly expresses angst. He says he's honest with me because he has nothing to gain from lying. Also, the moodiness all seems to be tied to deep fear of failure. He told me before he was 25 he was always "oh things will work out somehow, I can't fail because I'm me". Then he didn't get a job he wanted and a relationship didn't work out and now he says he has constant fear of screwing things up somehow.
-When not working spends free time with his family. States that he won't move while his grandparents are still alive. Makes the family calendar every year, is into family genealogy. Says his feelings are hurt when people discount what's important to him-being with his family. Wants me to attend every football tailgate, family gathering, anything family-related. I find this exhausting sometimes. The thing is, he does at times too but he always goes anyway. Is generally the family member who drives people places or fixes stuff for them. Also tends to gossip a lot around his family. Also enjoys saying mean/innappropriate things around his mother for entertainment because they always shock her. She seems very SFJ, and was disappointed in him for his Halloween costume (priest robe w/Norwegian death metal makeup) when he went as Judas Priest.
-Says people accuse him of lacking morals because he acts however he wants but that he does have them-he has his own created internal value system.
-Says he views sex and romance as separate, the romance is laying around talking, saying 'I love you' (which he wants to do way more than me-he said it first, just randomly blurted it out one day), cuddling, spending time together but sex is done because it feels good. He describes me as wonderful and perfect with unnerving frequency. Again, it feels weird to me to be outwardly expressive of such things. And after he asked and I told him I loved him back he checked again a couple weeks later, and has done so. He seems to need reassurance that I haven't run away yet.
-Is very into his appearance in that he always wants to straighten his hair, moisturizes, scolds himself if he eats too much (seems afraid of being fat). Asked me one day if I thought he was gay when we met, I said no but that my roommate had. Claims people often mistake him as that. His voice isn't the deepest, he gets really excited and uses hand gestures in conversation, he seems to be uncaring about using traditionally female words like 'slut' to describe himself, likes to joke about wearing pink or painting his nails (black only). His mother says he's the daughter she never had.
-Within a couple minutes of meeting an ENTJ that I know he asked me why we don't hang out with her more. He seemed to become more energized around her. Also another male friend of mine, who is either ENTJ or ENFJ seemed to make him more talkative. He's about as quiet as I am in social interactions unless a topic of interest comes up. My INTP and INFP friends really like him and always want to hang out. He seems to really like them too. But he's very good about being willing to meet everybody, he seems very aware of being nice to who he's "supposed" to be nice to. He also seems to really like my mom, she's an ISTJ. A couple times I've complained about things she does that I find annoying and he sides with her, saying something like "that's how a mother should be". In terms of friends, he seems to have many acquaintances (just like me) but only a couple actual friendships that he maintains longer than the duration of social activity (like working in the same place). The friends that he has maintained the longest are all girls from high school and he's always had difficulty making male friends outside of work.
Okay, if you've made it down here congrats! Type away!