I feel like I'll never know my true core enneagram lol.
Person viewing this: HE'S AN E6 or an E9! ONLY WAY!
No. I still think you are a social 4.
That doesn't mean I am right, but that's my opinion.
64...9?
RUNS AWAY LIKE THE 9... or maybe 6... or maybe whatever I am too!
Hello. Thank you all for coming to my TED talk. Much like F. Scott Fitzgerald I use 17 words to say what I could with 1.
Today I will be discussing the differences between two emos and one non-emo. AKA 4, 9, and 6. Also 8 is here as well for like 5 seconds solely for illustrative juxtaposition.
8's live in complete and utter denial of the emo, that's why they're so "strong". 4's aestheticize and/or intellectualize (w5) the emo. 9's are overwhelmed by and adrift within the emo because they don't have the keen emotional awareness of 4's so it's numb/death and therefore 9's are just very soggy sponges. 6's know the emo exists (that's how we differentiate them from 8's and why I even brought the 8's up), they acknowledge it and immediately begin to either sublimate it (phobic) or subvert it (cp). Unlike 9's and 4's, 6's blame external factors for the emo too, so it's like their relationship to it has this more resentful characteristic to it than the dejected characteristic of 4 and 9. This is why I've noticed the negative emotions of others make 6's uncomfortable, wether they realize it or not, they tend to want to expedite the process of getting over the emotions because that is what they do themselves. I think turbulent and emotional 6's are just a rapid sucession of that pattern. Which is why they seem so capricious and things.
Additionally, when you are an sx dom you are a 4 no matter what type you are. And that relationship is reflexive because 4's of any subtype will mistype as the sx subtype of whatever type they think they are. Similarly, when you are self-preservation, you're a 6 no matter what type you are. And when you're a 6, you're self preservation no matter what you actually are. If that makes sense. I don't know anything about social instinct because I honestly just don't care about that one. It hurts to think about it a weird way...it makes me angry and uncomfortable.
Which brings me to the type which most commonly mistypes as a 4: sexual 6, "strength and beauty". We can differentiate between a 4 (any subtype) and a sexual 6 because 4's are the ugly duckling no matter how beautiful of a swan they may be. They are not just "I am special", they are "I am special because I am the ugliest of all the ducklings". Sexual 6 is not the ugliest duckling, they instead subscribe to conventional attractiveness and it's correlative strength within the established structure ("strength and beauty"). Sexual/counterphobic 6 is willing to move very far from the center, but not leave the entire structure the way 4's do. Instead of being weird, they'll peacock and tell about how attractive/great they are. Which implies the uncertainty they themselves feel about this.
9 is also self-depreciating because they feel like they exist outside holy love (unconditional value) so even when they make little connections with 3 and begin to have little bursts of not low self-esteem, they won't ever be as agressive and constant about that stuff as the sx 6 because their insecurity is about ever even being able to reconnect to holy love/inherent value not just the manifestations of value or their correlation to strength. Which is why I think the idea that 9 is the most common type has some grounding, the way in which a 9 attempts to attain worth is reflected in what they attempt to embody. It opens up the type to many different manifestations rooted in the same issue (because if we look at them long enough we see the same half-hearted, two dimensional quality to that projected personality) therefore inviting diversity because the peacemaker is the only one that attempts to
embody and that strips away any rigid, defined aspects to the personality. Whereas even the other two attachment types have more definition. I didn't explain that well at all but at least I get what I'm saying. This last part is not that relevant so it's ok if no one else does.
Forever, you're just weird/feel weird because you're INFJ and at that, INFJ and a boy. Like my dad. Who you do remind me of in your patterns but not particularities. So yeah I do think you're a 6 but not because you can't decide on your type.
TBH, I just wanted to tell someone my thoughts about this/get them down in this word salad that correctly implies I have absolutely no idea how to balance my diction or speak in a way that's very comprehensible any more for some reason. So yeah, this isn't an attempt to convice any of you of anything.
Now, someone tell me things about my type. I don't know why no one ever wants to tell me things about my type. But I suspect it's because I don't have a personality.